Moon Festival ~Does Moon Goddess Dream of Dumplings~
EP 0: Moonlight Hunter
Dr. Roman: Hmm-hmm♪ La-la-laaa♪
Dr. Roman: Whoa, Fujimaru. Why are you looking at me like that?
Dr. Roman: Mmm, it's like you're saying “I, myself, don't know, but this must be a form of happiness.”
Dr. Roman: Your expression is like a mixture of spiritual insight, affection, and a little pity. Has something happened?
Fujimaru 1: No, but, Doctor finally...
Dr. Roman: What, were you watching me?
Dr. Roman: And what do you mean by “finally?” I didn't do anything!
Fujimaru 2: Why are you walking around with an empty plate?
Dr. Roman: Yeah, that's the problem. I keep waiting and waiting, but Mash hasn't come back yet.
Dr. Roman: I asked her to grab something from storage for me, but I wonder if something happened...
Da Vinci: Hey, Romani, where are the dumplings? I'm about to show footage of the moon.
Da Vinci: Let's hurry up and hit the booze. After all, we've been holding out for this day.
Dr. Roman: ...Hmph, yeah right. That's what you say, but you've already started drinking like a fish, you lout...
Dr. Roman: Wait a little while longer, Da Vinci. Not all the staff members are here yet.
Fujimaru 1: Alcohol?
Fujimaru 2: Dumplings?
Dr. Roman: Huh? Fujimaru, didn't you hear? The outdoor calendar shows it's almost the end of summer.
Dr. Roman: Meaning it's almost time for the Moon Festival. It's said the harvest moon shall liven up conversations between friends.
Dr. Roman: The date isn't exactly right, but as long as there's a beautiful full moon in the night sky, it's perfect for the Moon Festival.
Dr. Roman: There's not a lot to do for fun in Chaldea, so I prepared this thinking we could use a break, but...
Da Vinci: Mash hasn't come back yet. She was getting the dumplings from food storage.
Da Vinci: She said, “I'm powerful now that I've become a Demi-Servant, so leave it to me.” Then she took off on her own...
Da Vinci: I have a bad feeling about this. Fujimaru, go see what's up—
Dr. Roman: The alarm? What's going on?!
Mash: This is serious, Doctor! Someone has raided our food storage!
Mash: As well as the offerings we prepared for the festival and everything else... Chaldea's food reserves are nearly down to zero!
Fujimaru 1: What?!
Mash: Ah. Good morning. I'm happy to see you're as healthy as ever.
Dr. Roman: Is this the place for that kind of conversation? I'm impressed by how much you trust each other.
Fujimaru 2: That aside, those glasses really look good on you, Mash.
Mash: Ah... Thank you. My eyes are good so I don't really need them, but...
Da Vinci: Okay, look around you. This is supposed to be a tense scene.
Dr. Roman: No, this is not the time to discuss that. Somebody raided our food storage. Who could it be?!
Mash: The thing is... None of the surveillance cameras picked up anything... They're not broken, but...
Mash: ...but it's like all of the recorded footage has been painted over with a heart mark, so we can't see anything.
Mash: The analysis team in the monitor room said...
Mash: “When we watched the footage, we got dizzy and fell unconscious, one right after the other...”
Da Vinci: Hmm... I see. This is a real pickle.
Dr. Roman: A pickle?! Leonardo, have you gone bonkers, too?!
Da Vinci: Ah, pardon me. I was just having a bit of fun. But anyway, Romani, take a look at this Singularity.
Da Vinci: Three minutes ago, someone Rayshifted to France. That must've been the cause of the alarm.
Mash: Rayshift... With no authorization, and solo? You're saying the culprit escaped by Rayshifting?
Mash: I can't imagine a Servant capable of something like that...
Dr. Roman: Good point. Right now, Chaldea doesn't exist in normal dimension.
Dr. Roman: The only ones who can go outside are Master Fujimaru and contracted Servants.
Da Vinci: On the other hand, a Contracted Servant can do evil deeds.
Da Vinci: But only special and extremely powerful Heroic Spirits could bend the rules of time and space.
Mash: ...Um, did you make a contract with such a powerful Servant?
Mash: There are no records of it, as far as I know...
Da Vinci: Yes, but the order of cause and effect would be opposite, you see?
Da Vinci: We're talking about a Heroic Spirit that could bend time and space, and stretch the string of possibility for “eventually forming a contract”
Da Vinci: into the “eventual outcome of a contract.” It would be an incredibly powerful Heroic Spirit.
Dr. Roman: ...If it finds the coordinates of Chaldea using nonsensical means like that, that's incredible...
Dr. Roman: But... I see,
Dr. Roman: if the culprit here is a Heroic Spirit who's willing to form a contract with Fujimaru.
Dr. Roman: Then the damage we suffer wouldn't be critical.
Dr. Roman: Because whatever the future, Fujimaru wouldn't form a contract with an outright villain.
Mash: No, Doctor. The problem is that we don't have any food left.
Mash: At this rate, Senpai's health management and tea time after a Grail expedition can't be guaranteed.
Mash: As the Master's Servant, I propose we take measures quickly.
Dr. Roman: Y-yeah, I guess this is not the time to be thinking, “If we're out of sweet dumplings, we can just have sweet bean paste instead.”
Dr. Roman: Fujimaru. For the sake of Chaldea's future,
Dr. Roman: and our fun Moon Festival, would you go check out the situation for us?
Fujimaru 1: Yes I'll go, Doctor.
Dr. Roman: I knew I could count on you. That's why you're the Master of Chaldea.
Fujimaru 2: You really like sweet bean paste, huh?
Dr. Roman: Well, of course. Sugar is indispensable to someone who works with his brain.
Dr. Roman: Actually, I was more of a pancake guy, but I got addicted to it when I went to Japan. Hahaha.
Mash: All right, Doctor, please prepare for the Rayshift. I'll get every last sweet dumpling back!
Da Vinci: (The culprit must be a Divine Spirit-class Servant that can Rayshift by itself...)
Da Vinci: (Well, some things are better left unsaid!)
Mash: Rayshift is complete. This is—the France we're familiar with, right?
Mash: The one who raided Chaldea's storage is here—? Huh? I hear something being fired nearby...
Woman: Oh my. What do we have here?
Mash: ...Master. There's a woman in strange clothes...
Mash: She's holding a bow in an improper posture, firing not so effective arrows, and—
Werebeast: Ghraaaaaa!
Mash: She's fighting a pack of werewolves! What's going on here?!
Fujimaru 1: I don't know, but let's help her!
Fujimaru 2: For now, let's fight!
Woman: Oh my! Are you here to give me a hand, stranger? Hehe, aren't you a decisive one?
Woman: I will take up on your kind offer. Let's fight together.
Woman: We can leave the fun conversation for after the battle. Right now, let's take out these bandits!
--BATTLE--
Mash: Combat complete. But, I still sense enemies nearby.
Mash: Doctor, let me know the status of the surrounding— Doctor?
Fujimaru 1: Bad connection?
Mash: Seems like it... We can perform a Rayshift to return to Chaldea from here, but...
Fujimaru 2: Think Roman's slacking?
Mash: Huh? The doctor's being lazy, you think?
Mash: I can assure you that is not the case. Dr. Roman isn't the type to slack off at his job.
Mash: The more pressing concern is this woman.
Mash: Um... Excuse me. You're not a normal human, are you? Are you...a Servant?
Woman: Hmm? Am I a Servant? Oh, you mean a Heroic Spirit! I know all about them!
Woman: Indeed! I am a Servant! The splendid hunter forever seen in the night sky—
Woman: My name is Orion! That's me! Round of applause, please!
Mash: You heard her, Senpai. What do you think?
Fujimaru 1: Clap, clap, clap.
Orion: Hehe. Thanks for the applause. I don't know who you are, but I think we can be friends♡
Fujimaru 2: Wasn't Orion a guy?
Orion: Truth is stranger than fiction, you know.
Orion: They say that Orion was a fast-talking, no-good skirt-chaser who'd go after any woman he saw, but—
???: PGRYU!
Mash: Pgryu?
Orion: Hehehe. Sorry, I think that's my tummy rumbling. I haven't had anything to eat in so long.
Orion: Anyway, they say all kinds of mean things about Orion in the legend, but he's actually a pure-hearted, wonderful hunter!
Orion: And I've materialized to prove just that... Well? Do you believe me?
Mash: She's appeared in order to repair her reputation... In other words, to correct an incorrect history!
Mash: I know how you feel, Miss Orion. Your skills with a bow—
Mash: I'm really confused as to how you could hit a target effectively with that stance,
Mash: but that was really impressive! You're as good as the Greek myths say!
Mash: The legendary hero who never misses, who seduced the Goddess Artemis!
Orion: Oh my. Oh dear. Never misses, you say? Hehehehe.
???: Pgryyyrururur!
Fujimaru 1: Your stomach again?
Mash: Aww, that's bad manners, Senpai. You shouldn't ask a girl about her tummy.
Fujimaru 2: Huh? Seduced a goddess?
Orion: Oh, that's true. More specifically, he made a goddess fall in love with him♡
Mash: By the way, Miss Orion. Have you seen anyone suspicious around here?
Mash: We're looking for someone who stole a large amount of provisions from our base...
Orion: Suspicious people... Maybe that trio I just saw?
Orion: They were running that way carrying something strange.
Orion: But, they were a little out of it. All the food was falling out all over the place.
Orion: See those wolves gathering? They're here to get the food that fell out.
Mash: Senpai! That's good information! Let's hurry and follow them!
Mash: Oh, but we need to get those dumplings back... Especially those super rare dumplings. I have to defend them at any cost...
Fujimaru 1: Huh... Super rare... What?
Mash: Oh—that's right. You don't know about it.
Mash: Mixed with the other dumplings are some special ones, made by a famous Japanese shop named Nanayabashiya.
Mash: Their taste rivals a 10,000 yen sukiyaki, and their value rivals a dozen Saint Quartz...
Mash: They're special. I'm not sure what I'm saying anymore.
Fujimaru 2: Mash, calm down.
Mash: Oh... Right. Sorry. I panicked. It's definitely not that I'm hungry.
Mash: Anyway, they're very special dumplings. They're humanity's greatest treasure, and must be defended at all costs.
Orion: I see! I understand. Can I help, then?
Orion: I owe you for saving me, and I need to showcase my archery skills, too. You're a Master, aren't you?
Orion: If you saw Orion being useful here, I'm sure you would want to contract with her, right?
Mash: That would be great. Thanks for your help, Miss Orion.
Fujimaru 1: Yeah, let's get those dumplings.
Fujimaru 2: Let the hunt begin!
Mash: Right! We'll pick up the rare dumplings as we chase after the thieves!
Mash: This is a special mission, unlike any we've done before, but let's do our best!
EP 1: Antoinette and Company
Mash: I see light ahead... It's a campfire! We caught up to them, Master!
Mash: But that's—that's—
Marie: Here you go, d'Eon. Open wide. Say aaah♡
d'Eon: Th-th-thank you, Marie... Okay... Aaah.
Marie: Delicious, aren't they? They're so plump and chewy, and that sweet, sugary taste...
Marie: And they're so cute, like snowballs. I'd love to learn how to make them.
Marie: Here, you have some, too. Aren't sweet dumplings lovely, Sanson?
Sanson: Y-Yes... I accept this gratefully, my Queen. But is this really okay?
Sanson: It said “Take what you like,” but for us to take all three tons of it...
Marie: My dear Sanson, you need to take what you can, when it's offered to you.
Marie: Your modesty is commendable, but it's not good to be too modest.
Marie: What happened to the bold Sanson who readied the guillotine?
Sanson: No... My queen, I didn't actually like the guillotine. Quite the opposite...
d'Eon: You complain too much, executioner. Her Majesty said we're taking them.
d'Eon: So we shall help her do it. That's all there is to it. Fortunately, we have access to Marie's glass carriage.
d'Eon: Carrying a ton or two of snacks is easy. We should've taken more.
Marie: Heheh. d'Eon understands a maiden's heart.
Marie: They're so delicious! It's natural for a person to want as much as they can carry.
Marie: Okay, say aah♡
d'Eon: Aaah!
Sanson: Wait, you're eating more?! That's too much!
Sanson: As a man of medicine, I must advise against consuming any more calories. You'll get fat...
Marie: Really, you don't have to worry, Sanson. Everything I eat goes right to my breasts.
Marie: The more I eat, the bustier I get. So there's no way I'll get fat.
Sanson: Wh-what...did you...say?! I-is that true, Marie?!
Sanson: That's medically impossible! But if it is true, I...I!
d'Eon: ...How crude. Sit down and stop panicking. But it's true, executioner.
d'Eon: Her Majesty has grown to have one of the finest bodies in France. It's truly amazing.
Sanson: —Tell me more! Give me more details! This is important for medical science!
Marie: It's not medical at all! It's something all girls have in common!
d'Eon: (...I don't know...I think it's only you, your Majesty, who doesn't have any fat go to her belly...)
Sanson: —! Chevalier!
d'Eon: I know! Get back, your Majesty!
Mash: You're all under arrest! Surrender peacefully, you dumpling thieves!
Marie: Oh, it's you!
Marie: ...You're ...You're... Who are you again? Sanson, do you know them?
Sanson: Of course not. If you think you do, you're probably imagining it.
Sanson: They're probably bandits, lured here by the light of our campfire.
d'Eon: Indeed. For once we agree, executioner.
d'Eon: Take up your swords, brigands! You'll pay for ruining her Majesty's snack time!
Marie: Hm... I really do think we've met somewhere, though...
Marie: I can't remember it... This is so strange... I have this feeling that we'd get along great...
Marie: But, now that it's come to this, we shall fight! Forgive me for the rough welcome, familiar ones!
Marie: I'm sure you have your reasons, but we're enemies now. I'm not letting you have these dumplings!
Mash: That's Marie for you. What a selfish declaration of war!
Mash: Let's go, Senpai! First, let's jog their memories in battle!
--BATTLE--
Sanson: Gah!
d'Eon: Tch... They bested me!
Marie: Auuuggghhh!
Mash: The battle is over. Now we can talk—
Orion: Wait, Mash. There's one more back there. This presence... It's the same type of loser, just like my darling!
???: Hahaha...hahahaha... So you saw me. Impressive...
Mash: S-Senpai! A really shady-looking pervert came out of the shadows!
???: I'm no pervert. I am Amadeus Mask. The wandering fairy.
Marie: Oh my! Amadeus Mask! You were following us in secret again?
d'Eon: You again, pervert? Go back to Vienna!
Sanson: Heh... I can really count on you, huh? You showed up in our hour of dire peril...
Amadeus Mask: Hehehe... The one I think I'd get along with dislikes me, and the one I don't care for finds me reliable... What's going on here?
Amadeus Mask: Well, it doesn't matter. Maria is in trouble. I can swallow my pride and work with you, even if I don't want to.
Amadeus Mask: Unknown travelers, prepare yourselves.
Amadeus Mask: It's obvious that Maria and her friends are in the wrong, but you know, I don't really care.
Amadeus Mask: Let us begin the symphony! Whew, I'm getting excited!
Amadeus Mask: Can you beat these three true perverts, now that they're orchestrated by me, the God of Music?!
d'Eon: —Wait a moment. Did you just include me in your statement?!
--BATTLE--
Amadeus: So yeah. A one-star Servant like me has no chance of winning.
d'Eon: You truly are the worst! All you did was slow us down!
Mash: Did you see that, Senpai? ...When Amadeus' mask slipped off, it hit Sanson on the back of the head...
Mash: ...And instantly knocked him out... Is that level of coordination only possible because they've known each other for years?
Marie: Don't worry about that, Mash. If Sanson was awake this discussion would take longer.
Mash: Marie, do you remember us now?
Marie: Yes, as we were fighting, somewhat. There's a lot to talk about, but first, here.
Marie: You can have these wonderful confections back. We had a small amount. I'm sorry.
d'Eon: (A small amount... A small amount? N-no, if her Majesty says so, then it's fine...)
Mash: No, as long we have them back, it's okay. We were going to give these equally to everyone...
Mash: Huh? Um...is this all? You were saying there were three tons worth a moment ago...
Marie: That was at the start. I did load up the carriage, but...
Marie: We ran into a group of three people passing by, and gave them most of the dumplings as a sign of friendship.
Mash: What?! You gave them almost three tons worth?
Marie: Of course. When you think about it, no matter how good they are, you can't eat three tons, can you?
d'Eon: Yes, that's right. I would've preferred you to think about that sooner, though.
Mash: That's a very good point, Marie... So where did the three strangers go?
Marie: They said they were going to pray near the waters of Marseille. If you hurry, you might catch them.
Mash: Senpai!
Fujimaru 1: Yeah, let's hurry, Mash!
Fujimaru 2: Yeah, let's get the grinding going, Mash!
Mash: Marie, I'd love to talk more, but we're in a hurry...
Marie: Yes, I know. Please be careful, Fujimaru.
Marie: May fortune smile upon your journey! Vive la France! And whassup!
d'Eon: My queen?! (Turns around in shock)
EP 2: Battle at the Coastline
Georgios: Hmm...
Martha: ...
Georgios: ...It's quiet. Very quiet. Don't you think, St. Martha?
Martha: Indeed. The ocean waves are calm tonight. By the way, St. Georgios...
Georgios: What is it? Oh, you want a photo?
Georgios: Unfortunately, my specialty is landscapes, not people.
Martha: No one wants one of your photos. I'm talking about those.
Georgios: Oh, these? My apologies. It's about time, yes. Will you go first?
Martha: Oh, my. I'm a little embarrassed.
Martha: But I cannot turn down your offer, St. Georgios.
Martha: Excuse me... Aaah.
Martha: Oh! These smell so good, and its texture on the tongue! It's super-duper yummy—Ahem.
Martha: It tastes splendid. The wisdom of the East is not to be dismissed.
Georgios: I'll have some for myself—Ahem. This is...Oho! It's hot! It's hot, but sweet!
Georgios: It seems simple, but you don't tire of it. It has a smooth surface, but a complex taste.
Georgios: Simple, yet deep. How to describe it?
Kojirou: You describe it as tasty, you two. If you'll excuse me, I'll have one myself.
Kojirou: Hmm... Mm...They're bite-sized, but not so small that it's not enough.
Kojirou: These dumplings are clearly the work of a master. I am in awe.
Kojirou: Truly, you can find geniuses in any era.
Martha: ...
Kojirou: What's wrong, Martha? Is there something stuck on my face?
Martha: No, I was just wondering what that black, honey-like sauce was.
Martha: I don't want one for myself. For one thing, I don't trust you.
Martha: You've been tagging along with us for days. Why don't you tell us what you're after?
Kojirou: My goal is as I spoke of when we first met. I seek a duel with you. That is all.
Martha: And I refused. I preach the folly of battle.
Martha: Besides, why must I fight you? I'm not the type.
Kojirou: Oh? Is that really true?
Martha: It's true! You sound like you don't believe me! Are you making fun of me?
Martha: What is your problem, anyway? Are you even a real samurai?
Kojirou: Hahaha. You saw right through me. When I have to act like a samurai, I can.
Kojirou: I am a wanderer, I act differently at different times.
Kojirou: But I'm not the only one. You seem to be carrying such burden as well.
Kojirou: A particularly big one. Tarasque, was it?
Martha: Huh!? You're after my Tarasque? Not me!?
Martha: I don't know how many wyverns you've taken down, but I doubt you can do anything with that skimpy sword?
Martha: Don't underestimate the scales of the Tarasque. They were thick enough to withstand one of my punches!
Kojirou: Oh, your punches? How interesting. I thought your weapon was a staff?
Martha: !!! Oh, how silly of you. Ahahah.
Martha: Perhaps you're hard of hearing? I'm a saint. I would never punch anyone.
Georgios: Hahaha. Come to think of it, before “He” gave her the staff, St. Martha was completely empty-handed, I'm told.
Georgios: So before you settled in as a Saint, you were fighting dragons with your bare hands, huh?
Georgios: I find that fascinating. As a fellow dragon slayer, I would've liked to have caught that with my camera.
Martha: I have not punched any dragons! I don't street-brawl anymore, and I've never fought with my bare hands in my life!
Martha: And Georgios, didn't you say you only photographed landscapes?
Mash: ...Another set of three Servants. I guess you could call these the three dragon slayers...
Mash: We're lucky Siegfried isn't here. ...Let's get ready to head in, Master!
Mash: Enough cooking and eating dumplings! Surrender peacefully to the ropes!
Martha: Huh? What's this about ropes?
Kojirou: She means to not struggle against her. In old Japan they'd tie up criminal's bodies with ropes before taking them away.
Martha: R-Ropes... Couldn't they just tie our hands... That's crazy, tying up someone's whole body...
Georgios: Criminals? I've no idea what you're talking about.
Mash: ...Um, I'm sorry, Mr. George. Those dumplings were stolen from Chaldea.
Mash: So I think you became guilty the moment you ate them.
Mash: But if you just give them back, we can forget all about it...
Georgios: ...I see. Even if we didn't know, how could we do such a thing?
Georgios: We paid for this food, but if it was stolen in the first place...
Georgios: Miss, we've never met before, but you seem to be telling the truth.
Georgios: I'll return this bag of food to you. That is the least we can do.
Mash: Huh...Oh, right. That would be a big help, but...
Fujimaru 1: We're not...fighting?
Fujimaru 2: I can't believe you actually listened to us!
Martha: Of course. We're famous saints, you know.
Martha: We admit when we're wrong, and strive to correct it. Though I do wish I could've had some more.
Martha: And only St. Georgios paid any money. Since I am not at any loss I don't really mind.
Georgios: That's right. Now, please take them. And return to this “Chaldea” place of yours.
Kojirou: I'm simply a freeloader, so I have no objection. Battle solves nothing.
Mash: Everyone... Senpai, let's go back. The mission is complete!
Orion: Hmm? Wait a second.
Orion: That was very touching, but I think that samurai's hiding a rare dumpling in his pocket.
Kojirou: Hmm? Samurai? Do you mean me?
Orion: And the saint has some behind her back, right?
Martha: Wh-what are you talking about?
Georgios: How disgraceful, you two... I do apologize.
Georgios: I'll stay here. Feel free to take these criminals back with you.
Orion: And you, the man with long hair, your camera pack is stuffed with hidden dumplings.
Georgios: THOU ART A DRAGON!?
Mash: Mr. George...
Georgios: Huh!? What a sharp-eyed lady... It seems we have no choice but to fight...
Martha: Indeed. It's not fair to call me a thief, and I want more dumplings anyway.
Martha: Just this once, I'll abandon my holy vows. Even though they are weightier than Tarasque.
Mash: Tarasque's pretty light then, huh?
Martha: Kojirou, you fight, as well. You've eaten plenty of free food up until now.
Kojirou: Yes, I've got nothing to do with this, but fair enough. You shall taste the wrath of my secret blade.
Fujimaru 1: They're coming, Mash!
Fujimaru 2: That's the problem with saints...
Mash: Right! They weren't listening to us at all!
--BATTLE--
Georgios: What have I done... What got into me?
Georgios: It must be the magical energy of the moon that compelled me to use Ascalon.
Georgios: Please realize, milady... The true enemy...is close at hand... (ka-thud)
Fujimaru 1: Georgios?!
Fujimaru 2: Mr. George!?
Kojirou: ...I never before fought out of greed, and now greed has dulled my blade...
Kojirou: In the moment greed took over, my defeat was assured... Bean paste buns are scary...
Kojirou: Oh, and I was strangely strong not because I'm on my home ground, but because of my class affinity? (ka-thud)
Fujimaru 1: LEGEND OF SAMURAI?!
Fujimaru 2: Kojirou what's-his-name!?
Mash: Both of them died well... We have the dumplings right here, so I'll get some incense for the funeral.
Martha: They haven't disappeared. They're just pretending to pass out because they're embarrassed.
Martha: Men can be so proud over the silliest things. Who cares if you lose a fight?
Georgios: A brutal strike! DWAH!
Kojirou: Such merciless truth! KWAH!
Fujimaru 1: ...That one really did knock them out.
Fujimaru 2: ...Is she really a saint?
Mash: It's true that men and women may have different views on fighting.
Mash: Statistical data shows that women engage in competition on a daily basis, and don't obsess over a single defeat.
Mash: They'd prefer to use the extra calories obsessing over more constructive things, I hear.
Fujimaru 1: Is that true for you, too?
Mash: I...I don't know. I haven't fought enough to really find value in the outcome of a fight.
Fujimaru 2:
Mash: Yes, but this is just statistical data. It differs for each individual.
Orion: Hey, guys, I hate to interrupt, but that scary woman is running straight for the sea.
Martha: Hahahaha! It's too late! Come forth, Tarasque! Scramble ride!
Martha: I'm outta here, kiddies! Next time we meet, I'll get you for this!
Mash: Oh! The sea parted, and a dragon came out... No, a turtle? An extremely tired-looking iron dragon?
Mash: Whatever it is, it's spinning up into the sky!
Mash: It looks just like an unidentified flying object, doesn't it, Senpai?
Fujimaru 1: Yeah, that's what everyone thought.
Fujimaru 2: She just made the morning papers.
Martha: Oh, but as a way of expressing our gratitude for the dumplings...
Martha: Yes, we did buy them off of a strange group in a glass carriage—
Martha: But later we ran into a fat man calling himself an emperor, and gave him the other half.
Martha: He was very skilled at persuasion...A professional debtor. The type who never pays back what he owes.
Martha: Be careful! You'll find him in the wasteland!
Orion: Hmm, after saying all that, she just flew off.
Orion: Looks like we've got more work to do. I don't mind, though. I'm having fun.
Orion: What will you do, Mash, Fujimaru? If you're going to give up, now might be the time.
Mash: No, we'll get as many dumplings back as we can.
Mash: Let's go, Master. That fat man is definitely our next foe!
EP 3: Moon Over the Ruined Castle
Caesar: Not bad. Not bad at all. I prefer plump, delicious fruit, but this is not bad.
Caesar: Excellent form. Easy to transport. Keeps for days. And more than anything, easy to eat!
Caesar: Yes, yes, yes, yes! What is this? I can't stop putting them in my mouth!
Caesar: Once you start, you just can't stop! I've got no choice but to eat all the dumplings in the world!
Caligula: WWAAARRHH! NNEERROOO!
Caesar: Heh, I see you're devouring them, too. You're not a true Roman emperor unless you love to eat.
Caesar: Though I guess I'm not really an emperor. I just laid the foundations for an empire.
Caligula: WAAARGGHH! FATSO!
Caesar: I am not fat! I am plump!
Orion: There's a huge pile of dumplings behind them... We finally reached our main target, I guess.
Orion: What will you do? Try to talk to them?
Fujimaru 1: I don't think that'll work.
Fujimaru 2: Let's heed Martha's warning.
Mash: Y-yes... The tyrant Caligula is a Berserker. We won't be able to talk to him.
Mash: Caesar is a Saber, so we can communicate with him, but he's also a little TOO good at talking.
Mash: If we try to talk to him, he might just “round” up the conversation in his favor.
Orion: Yeah...He's really...round.
Mash: For now, let's approach them, Senpai.
Mash: If we attack them from the front then we're in accordance with the laws of chivalry, we won't be cowards.
Fujimaru 1: You seem like you're getting angry.
Fujimaru 2: Chival...ry?
Mash: Stop acting like a food processor.
Mash: Those provisions belong to Chaldea, not Rome!
Caligula: ...? Not...Rome? Rome...isn't...a dumpling...
Caligula: But great Caesar is...round... What is...the meaning...of this?
Caesar: Stop comparing me to things that are round!
Caesar: ...Sigh. You interrupted my wonderful snack time... A mess. This is truly a mess.
Caesar: But I guess you've appeared at last. You're here for these Moon Festival dumplings, right?
Caesar: I managed to embezzle these from that wicked Rider...
Mash: (Senpai, did he just say “embezzle?” I'm not hearing that wrong, right?)
Caesar: And I have a just reason for doing so. Well? Will you listen to me, milady?
Caesar: You will, of course! Everyone listens to me! My speeches are said to be worth their weight in gold!
Caesar: So allow me to tell you how I made these dumplings mine.
Mash: U-um, that's not necessary... Let's just fight. Yeah. Fight.
Mash: I'm not really interested in the reason. Please just give them back...
Caesar: Ahem. I haven't introduced myself. How could I forget?
Caesar: I am none other than the famous flower of Rome, the Crimson Swordsman, Red Saber!
Mash: Sorry. You're going to get sued for that.
Caligula: Impossible!
Caesar: Hmm, no good, huh? I thought I could pull it off.
Caesar: And Caligula, you too?
Caesar: Anyway, allow me to continue. Traveling this bountiful land, I encountered a delicious scent.
Caesar: And then—
Fujimaru 1: You came, you saw, you bought! Right?
Mash: I understand how you feel, but be quiet, Master.
Fujimaru 2: ... (Deliberately say nothing)
Caesar: ...No response, huh? Sad...How very sad...
Caesar: Anyway, I sensed a wicked plot was involved. Thinking I should probably take action, I confiscated them.
Caesar: But if they were stolen, I can understand your anger. A sense of righteousness can create stronger feelings than revenge.
Caesar: I dislike fighting. It's a pain. So let's do this.
Caesar: First, I will trust you, and give you back these dumplings.
Caesar: You will go around and sell them at three times the price, then come back.
Caesar: I'll take the money, and give you no less than double what they're worth!
Caesar: Well? Your gain, not loss, and I get the satisfaction of having trusted you.
Caesar: How about I give them back to you under these terms?
Fujimaru 1: Ooh...So peaceful!
Orion: Calm down, Fujimaru!
Orion: I'm easily tricked, so I'm not one to talk, but you're being tricked right now!
Fujimaru 2: Ooh...Such a rip-off!
Mash: That's right, Master.
Mash: Martha was correct. Talking to Caesar is a waste of time.
Caesar: Hmm. It didn't work, huh? I tried copying Cleopatra...
Caesar: But, very well. Fighting it is. Caligula, prepare yourself.
Caligula: KWAAAOOOHH! They're clearly in the right, but WWWRROOAAH!
Caesar: Heh. Come, then! I'll give you a taste of my Crocea Mors!
--BATTLE--
Caligula: GGGNNOOOAAAH!
Caesar: Hmph, there's limits to what I can do as a Saber?! If only there were a class where I could win more easily.
Mash: Combat complete. We won, Master.
Mash: We'll take the dumplings back, then. Now we can return to Chaldea—
Mash: Huh? It's so...heavy?! I was able to carry it before, but...
???: ...Nom nom...nom nom...
Orion: Wait, Mash?! There's someone in the bag!
Caligula: What? Wait...I'll look...inside...
Caligula: Glory is given...to the victors... It is not good...to deny them...that...
???: No need. These belong to me.
Caligula: Gnuh?!
Altera: Oops. Have I cut the bag, as well? Forgive me. I do not destroy life. (Nom nom)
Fujimaru 1: Something crazy came out?!
Mash: That's um...Who is that? It's clearly a top-class Servant, but...
Fujimaru 2: Well, he had to be a good guy at the end...
Caesar: Indeed. I suppose it's Caligula's destiny to be killed through a cloth...
Orion: No way...Altera?! What's she doing here?!
Altera: Why are you surprised, woman? Wherever there is civilization, I appear.
Caesar: Altera? The Great King of the Western World, a warrior of the Huns, the avatar of destruction?
Caesar: But how did she get here? And how exactly did she get inside that bag?!
Altera: I walked here, basically. Rayshift is civilization, so I do not use it.
Caesar: You walked again?!
Orion: ...Mash, Fujimaru. She looks calm, but don't underestimate that woman.
Orion: She's a natural predator, not just of us, but of you humans.
Orion: She destroys any buildings she sees, as well as some she doesn't see. She doesn't target anything of nature, but she ends up destroying it too.
Orion: She's a giant pain in the neck, who destroys everything around her just by walking.
Altera: That is a misunderstanding. I do make distinctions.
Altera: In the end, it comes to feelings. I've realized there are different types of civilization.
Altera: Nom, mmm. Basically, there are both good and bad civilizations.
Altera: Dumplings are good civilization. Moon Festival is bad civilization.
Altera: So I am taking these dumplings, nom, and destroying you for having Moon Festivals, nom.
Altera: If you get in my way, I will show no mercy.
Altera: I will use this War God's sword, I happened to find on the ground, to destroy you.
Orion: What do you mean “happened to find?” Anything you use turns into that thing!
Caesar: Hmm, this is bad. I'll help you! I can't let what happened to Rome be repeated!
Mash: Master! The mysterious enemy Servant is coming! We'll fight her with everything we've got!
--BATTLE--
Altera: ...Well, that was not successful. The dumplings were good, though.
Altera: Oh—When will this dream—When will my Noble Phantasm attain its true power—
Mash: Good...The enemy Servant has vanished. Now we can finally—
Dr. Roman: Whew! Finally made it through! Hello? Hello?
Dr. Roman: Are you two okay!? I just detected an incredible vortex of magical energy!
Mash: Doctor, are communications back? ...Did you activate the Rayshift?
Dr. Roman: Yeah, I detected the provisions near you, and activated the Rayshift.
Dr. Roman: You have nothing else left to do, right? Then hurry and come back to Chaldea.
Dr. Roman: The Moon Festival party will be waiting for you.
Mash: Yes...That's right. We did achieve our goals, but...
Fujimaru 1: Huh? Where's Orion?
Mash: That's right. I don't see her anymore. I wanted to thank her for her help...
Caesar: Hmph. I'm still here. Do you have any goodbyes for me?
Fujimaru 1: You were useless against Altera.
Caesar: I can't help it. It's my class affinity. I wouldn't be more useful than that woman Archer.
Fujimaru 2: Want to join us for the Moon Festival at Chaldea?
Caesar: No, thank you. The offer is enough. Unknown Master, I hope we meet again someday.
Mash: Thank you for your help, though.
Mash: Just having you on our side was a big help.
Caesar: Yes, it means one less enemy. You understand war well.
Caesar: And so I shall give you one final warning.
Caesar: When it comes to food, the first owner and the last owner are different.
Caesar: So who is the true owner of these dumplings?
Caesar: Was it the one who prepared them? No. The one who cooked them? Even less so.
Caesar: Then who do they belong to? They belong to the one who is last to eat them.
Caesar: You claimed ownership of the dumplings, but from “that person's” perspective, that's nothing but a joke.
Caesar: Listen well. If you fail to realize this, the truth will remain forever hidden in darkness.
Mash: Caesar, what do you mean?
Caesar: Hahahaha! Stay hungry, and you'll find the answer someday!
Caesar: Farewell, farewell to you, girl with a bosom that's soft like a dumpling!
Mash: I-I take back my thank you! I think Rome is a bad civilization!
Dr. Roman: I was a little worried for a while there, but I'm glad to see you both safe.
Dr. Roman: We're handing out all the dumplings you recovered now. The Moon Festival party will begin soon.
Dr. Roman: Just rest a little until then.
Dr. Roman: I'd love to know what happened out there, but I'll wait.
Dr. Roman: You can tell all the staff about your adventures.
Mash: Sure, but, um...Doctor. Did you find the cause of the communications problem?
Dr. Roman: O-Oh, no. I couldn't find it. All our equipment was working normally.
Dr. Roman: But if there was a cause—
Da Vinci: It wouldn't be on Chaldea's side, but your own.
Da Vinci: Some kind of problem should have shown up during the time you Rayshifted and when the comms came back online...
Da Vinci: Fujimaru, any idea?
Fujimaru 1: ...A little.
Fujimaru 2: ...Pick...Up...
Da Vinci: Well, if it wasn't a problem, you can forget it. Good work out there!
Da Vinci: Enjoy the rest of your time at the Moon Festival party!
Mash: ...Something doesn't feel right.
Mash: I still feel like... I want some more rare dumplings.
Mash: We haven't caught the thief, and the greatest question still remains.
Mash: Who was that Orion?
EP 4: Does Moon Goddess Dream of Dumplings?
Mash: Oh?
Fujimaru 1: Huh?
Mash: These...appear to be the hills of France...
Mash: But what are we doing here? We were gathering rare dumplings...
???: Hehehe. I'll tell you, Mash.
???: “Thank you for all the work you've done for me and Orion. Good job, you two!”
Orion: Just kidding! Good evening, Master of Chaldea.
Mash: Miss Orion!
Orion: Hey, how've you been, Mash♡ It's a bit late, but do you need an introduction and explanation?
Fujimaru 1: Yeah, I think we kind of do.
Orion: Hehe. Soft on the outside, and prickly where it counts. I like it.
Orion: All right, time to explain! I was the one who attacked Chaldea's food supply!
Orion: Or at least, that was the plan. But it didn't work.
Orion: Um, I virtually proved the causality of being summoned by you, and managed to get into Chaldea,
Orion: but then it was just one failure after another. Lots of nasty traps kept me out of the storage.
Orion: All I could do was transport your entire storage into the Singularity.
Orion: And once I'd done that, I jumped to retrieve them, but...
Orion: By an unfortunate coincidence, a passing queen got to them before I could.
Orion: You know the rest. I chased after the dumplings,
Orion: gathered almost enough rare dumplings for the special Craft Essence, and waited for the time of my full revival!
Fujimaru 2: No, I think we're good.
Orion: R-Really? Hmm, you don't need an explanation, huh?
Orion: But, that's fine. It makes this easier. All that's left to do is fight.
Mash: So you were the real culprit? But why?
Orion: For the dumplings, of course. The dumplings.
Orion: The dumplings are a manifestation of faith, created for the moon... An offering to the moon.
Orion: Do you understand? They're a way to win the favor of the gods and bring them here.
Orion: Even if Chaldea didn't intend for it to happen, doing a ritual like that in a place with a summoning system...
Orion: ...was enough for me to awaken. More specifically, it slapped me awake.
Orion: But when I woke up, I was starving. I didn't have nearly enough magical energy.
Orion: So I wanted dumplings. The sacrifices that were created for me.
Orion: They are thoughts, created for me. A rare source of magical energy that exists to feed me.
Mash: Then—for the last few days Senpai and I have been running around to try and revive you!?
Orion: That's right♡ But please don't treat me as evil or anything.
Orion: I'm on your side...well, I'm not. But, I'm not your enemy.
Orion: If my darling is on your side, then I'm willing to be, too.
Orion: Anyway, thanks to all the rare dumplings that Fujimaru found, I can join your other Servants.
Orion: All that's left is to wait for you to summon me— But first, don't you think we need to test your skills?
Fujimaru 1: [♂ Agreed. You'll pay for tricking me. /♀ Agreed. You're going to regret this.]
Orion: Hmm... I guess you're right. I didn't trick you, but it is true that I was having fun...
Fujimaru 2: Can we talk instead of fight?
Orion: Impossible. I don't like humans to start with. And I dislike the weak ones the most.
Orion: So I want you to show me that you're strong enough to beat selfish, unreasonable, and inhuman old me.
Orion: Otherwise, you can't handle a Servant like me.
Mash: Sigh...I figured it would end like this.
Mash: But I was kind of ready for it, so it's fine!
Mash: Mash Kyrielight— Ready to go, Master!
Fujimaru 1: Right! Let's beat this goddess, Mash!
Orion: That's the spirit! Let me reintroduce myself then.
Orion: I am the deity of moonlight, the elegant representation of purity, virginity, hunting, and eternity—
Orion: One of the ancient gods of Mt. Olympus! I, the Moon Goddess Artemis, shall test you!
Orion: I hope you do well. Try and beat me, just like my darling did that day♡
--BATTLE--
Artemis: Kyaaahh! You! Beat! Me!
Mash: We did it! A perfect victory, Master! We defeated the Moon Goddess Artemis!
Artemis: (Sob, sob) I told you to fight hard, but you didn't have to hit THAT hard... Oww!
Artemis: Now causality is established. I don't know when we'll meet again.
Artemis: Maybe when we do, I won't remember Mash, or you, Fujimaru.
Artemis: But I have become a part of you. The Moon Goddess shall flow from Olympus to Chaldea.
Mash: No... Goddess Artemis is disappearing...
Artemis: Aww, silly. Next time, just call me Artemis, Mash.
Artemis: This is just a temporary goodbye. I'm sure that before long...we'll see each other again on those familiar seas.
Artemis: Until then, goodbye! It wasn't very long, but I enjoyed our Moon Festival night adventure!
Mash: Artemis...disappeared.
Fujimaru 1: We'll see her again.
Mash: You're right. Even if none of us remember what happened tonight, I'm sure we'll be able to get along.
Fujimaru 2: I hope we can see her again.
Mash: We will. She loves humanity so much. I'm sure we'll see her soon.
Mash: I know she said she didn't like humans, but I'm sure that's just because she can't leave us alone.
Mash: ...The dream is ending. Our night of adventure is coming to a close.
Mash: Good work this time. I'll see you when you wake up, Senpai.