Adventure of Singing Pumpkin Castle
Prelude
Mash:
Good morning, Senpai. I know you just woke up, but an invitation has arrived for you.
Mash:
Here you go. The envelope is traditional looking,
and extremely formal.
Mash:
There's no return address on it but clearly this is Senpai's name on the envelope.
Mash:
From the heading, it appears to be an invitation to a Halloween party.
Fujimaru 1:
Halloween! Is it already that time?
Mash:
Yes. It is, indeed, that russet-colored season now.
In Japan, it's the time for viewing autumn foliage.
Fujimaru 2:
What's Halloween?
Mash:
You're not familiar with it?
Mash:
It was originally a year's end celebration in Celtic culture,
but it changed over time to become All Hallow's Eve...
Mash:
It's now a celebration put on the night before people offer up prayers to saints.
Mash:
Though, I haven't actually experienced a Halloween celebration...
Mash:
The bigger problem is the invitation itself, Senpai.
Dr. Roman:
I happened to overhear your conversation.
A Halloween celebration, you say?
Dr. Roman:
Sounds fun! I love festive events like that! Back when the Director was with us, she would never approve such things...
Fujimaru 1:
...That's [♂ kinda /♀ a little] inappropriate, Doctor.
Dr. Roman:
Oh... I guess it was. Sorry, that was my bad.
I'll be more careful from now on.
Mash:
The Doctor didn't mean any harm, Senpai.
Words just never go through his brain, as usual.
Dr. Roman:
I feel absolutely ashamed... The greatest flaw of a science otaku is the utter lack of delicacy.
Dr. Roman:
I really need to spend more time paying my respects to the late Director. This time I will put more time and emotion into it...
Fujimaru 2:
The Director is still alive.
Dr. Roman:
Huh?! She's alive?!
Ah, I see. You mean she lives in our heart.
Dr. Roman:
After all, I feel the same way.
Dr. Roman:
I never fail to clean the Director's Office, and I make daily offerings with her favorite dried fruit.
Dr. Roman:
You know what, I think that tonight, I'll put up some pumpkin decorations in the Director's Office.
Dr. Roman:
Although, Olga Marie never admits when she likes something. She'll probably say something like,
“What are these useless things?!”
Dr. Roman:
...Okay, I need to stop. It's a celebration, and here I am dampening the mood with my talk.
Dr. Roman:
Ahem! All right, let's turn this mood around—
Dr. Roman:
But really, Fujimaru!
You're a smooth one, scoring an invitation like that!
Dr. Roman:
Who could it be from?
I certainly don't recall sending you that.
Mash:
I didn't send it either, Doctor.
But if neither you nor I sent it, that means...
Dr. Roman:
Undoubtedly, this is some kind of mischief. After all, letters from the outside world can't be delivered here.
Mash:
In any case, Senpai, let's read the invitation.
Mash:
Please rest assured that it is free of razor blades or any other dangerous items.
Letter:
Dear Fujimaru, I am writing to inform you of a splendid Halloween party that is to take place.
Letter:
My little Castle Csejte is now completely remodeled!
Letter:
You'll be swallowed up in classic and dragonic decor☆
Letter:
I hereby humbly invite you to a dream-like night of elegance and wonder.
Letter:
At the party, you will find splendid pumpkin cuisine from the four corners of the world,
Letter:
as well as a splendid serenade from an adorable idol,
a sweet serenade from a young girl that will set your heart on fire,
Letter:
and a serenade that's sung by an unparalleled diva.
It all awaits you.
Letter:
Indeed, it shall be a grand ball that could set any soul alight. It will surely sink its teeth into your heart and savor it as well.
Letter:
Both your mind and body will have a deluxing experience! Won't you come and bask in the spectacular sensation of being mired in a nightmare?
Letter:
The theme is, “Sweet Blood Märchen Torture.”
I eagerly await your attendance.
Letter:
—Be sure to come, okay?
Dr. Roman:
That is horrible!
Mash:
The fact that she emphasizes singing three times seems unbearably sinister to me.
Mash:
...Senpai, what shall we do?
Fujimaru 1:
This “deluxing” is supposed to be “relaxing,” isn't it?
Mash:
You're right. I wonder if she wrote it out of excitement or if she didn't know what she was saying.
Fujimaru 2:
So this “torture” bit is...
Mash:
She really means “torture.” To translate it accurately, it would be “Sweet, blood-covered, fairy tale-like, and torturous.”
Mash:
There's no signature on the invitation, but... Based on the content of the note, I have a good idea who sent it.
Mash:
A Servant who loves to sing... Loves to daydream...
And also enjoys blood and torture. It could only be...
Fujimaru 1:
Elisabeth...
Fujimaru 2:
Bátho...
Dr. Roman:
No, you must not utter another syllable. To speak her name is to summon her, Fujimaru!
Dr. Roman:
Just as speaking the truth isn't always the best idea,
spotting a disaster before it happens doesn't necessarily mean you can prevent it.
Mash:
So—precisely what are you trying to say, Doctor?
Dr. Roman:
Well... If you can't avoid a dangerous situation,
it's easier to charge in without a second thought!
Dr. Roman:
That philosophy has gotten me through most problems or troubles that I've encountered.
Fou:
Fou, fooooooou!
Mash:
Let's just ignore Doctor's advice.
He doesn't understand human emotion whatsoever...
Mash:
...Senpai.
Are you planning to respond to the invitation?
Mash:
I've...never experienced an event of this kind, so I am interested, I suppose...
Dr. Roman:
Oh, the residual Spiritron information on this letter indicates its point of origin.
Dr. Roman:
You could go anytime you want...
So what will you do, Fujimaru?
Fujimaru 1:
Mash, let's go to the party together!
Mash:
Of course! I look forward to your guidance and support!
Fujimaru 2:
As a matter of fact, I happen to love pumpkins.
Dr. Roman:
Oh dear, you're not very honest, are you? But, if you love pumpkins so much, I suppose you'd better go.
Dr. Roman:
She seems to have gathered some good materials.
I'll join you as well.
Mash:
Then let's head out to the theme park of our dreams - a Halloween party!
Mash:
...Um.
We should bring lunch with us, shouldn't we?
Section 1: Haunted Forest
Mash:
We've arrived. The time period is unknown but the location appears to be somewhere in Europe.
Mash:
That said... It feels both a bit frightening and yet fun, somehow. How odd.
Mash:
There are jack-o'-lanterns hanging all over the place,
and all the skeletons are dancing about.
Fou:
Fou, fooou! Fa!
Dr. Roman:
It's a much grander setup than I imagined...
Perhaps I underestimated her...
Mash:
Yes... Since this is Miss Ba...ry we're talking about,
I thought she'd be more of a paper decorations kind of girl...
Dr. Roman:
Seems like we might need to pay extra attention here.
Dr. Roman:
I'm picking up some weak hostile signatures here and there. There's no telling what could happen here.
Be on your guard as you investigate.
Mash:
Right, this was totally unexpected, so it's sure to be more than we bargained for!
Mash:
Now, let's go, Master!
Mash:
All that glitters isn't gold, but when in Rome, do as the Romans do, they say!
???:
Leave it there... Leave it there...
Leave some AP or stones and stuff there...
Mash:
Hmmph! So a ghost-type is the first up,
I see... How typical.
Mash:
It's far from surprising, but well, I suppose it is what it is.
It's the most basic of basics in a haunted house scenario.
Mash:
On second thought, this could be fun.
Senpai, quickly now! It's time for some ghost-busting!
--BATTLE--
Mash:
I'm not picking up any more enemies nearby.
Those must've just been some strays.
Mash:
I suppose that's the quality of enemies you get right at the entrance. We need to find the real deal as soon as possible—
Mash:
Um, shouldn't we head toward that totally suspicious-looking castle over there, Master?
Fujimaru 1:
That castle... An evil castle of blood... Ugh, my head!
Fou:
Fooou...
Dr. Roman:
I understand how you feel.
Do you need a tranquilizer?
Fujimaru 2:
You're in high spirits, aren't you, Mash?
Mash:
Yes, absolutely! Uh, I mean...
Of course I am, since this is our work and all.
Mash:
I wasn't hoping it would be like going to a real theme park or anything, um, definitely not!
Dr. Roman:
Huh? ...Hmmm...
That's odd. Maybe this gauge is broken...
Mash:
Doctor? In your professional opinion, did you notice something odd about that ghost just now?
Dr. Roman:
Eh, not really.
It was probably my imagination. Just forget it.
Dr. Roman:
(A nearby tremor in the Singularity... Really. It couldn't be. Hmmm, I'll just pretend I didn't see anything.)
Dr. Roman:
You kids just go on enjoying yourselves. You'd best head to the castle first, like the invitation said.
Mash:
Of course we will! Let's head for the pumpkin village just beyond the forest!
???:
Eh heh heh, eh heh heh heh heh...
Eh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh...
???:
I...
...'ve?
???:
fo...
...und
???:
you
☆
Fou:
...Fou?
(Turns around, feeling a sudden cold chill)
Section 2: I Will Come to Your Side, I Have Come
Mash:
It's further than I expected, but this town certainly looks more impressive than I imagined.
Mash:
What do you think, Master?
If you like, we could pause here for a moment to rest.
Fujimaru 1:
That sounds good.
Mash:
All right then.
Doctor, we're going to take a short break.
Fujimaru 2:
It'd be nice to eat some pumpkin pie.
Mash:
!!!
Good thinking, Senpai.
Mash:
As good as being chosen by Weekly Halloween Magazine to receive the title of “This Autumn's Number One Master,” maybe?
Dr. Roman:
Hmmm, I'm not detecting any enemies near you.
Looks like you should be able to relax for a bit.
Mash:
All right, it's time for our homemade lunch then.
Here's to our super lunchtime!
Kiyohime:
My, how valiant.
In that case, shall I lay out a blanket to sit on?
Mash:
Ah, good idea. Please do.
Kiyohime:
There you are, Master. Please have a seat.
Here, these are homemade grilled rice balls.
Fujimaru 1:
Thanks.
Kiyohime:
And here is some tea.
Fujimaru 1:
It's delicious!
Kiyohime:
Oh, you're too kind...
Fujimaru 1:
By the way...
Kiyohime:
Yes? What is it?
Fujimaru 1:
What are you doing here?
Mash:
Now that you mention it...
Why are you here, Kiyohime?
Fou:
Fofooooou!
Kiyohime:
Oh my, I would've thought one's wife would naturally always be at one's side.
Kiyohime:
I went to the trouble of hiding for him in a box tied with a bow, but my silly husband is just so indifferent.
Kiyohime:
Then he went and fell for that unspeakably shady invitation. As your loving wife, I couldn't sit by and do nothing.
Mash:
How odd. Somehow, it feels as though the words I'm hearing and the actual written words are fatally irreconcilable.
Fou:
Fou...
Kiyohime:
And that, basically, is why I've come here.
Fear not, I shall guard you flawlessly.
Kiyohime:
Yes, 24 hours a day, from head to toe, from all directions, without a second's hesitation.
Kiyohime:
Go on now, let the fanfare sound!
For “Kiyohime is now your wife!”
Fujimaru 1:
Thanks for your continued support.
Kiyohime:
Ohhh, you're so cold!
But it's part of your charm, eh heh heh heh heh...
Dr. Roman:
Well, I'm overwhelmed with anxiety for your future,
but what do you think, Mash?
Mash:
For once, I'm actually in agreement with you, Doctor...
Kiyohime:
Oh my, it seems something is nearby. Now then, Master,
let us hold hands and go forth on a “honeymoon.”
Fujimaru 1:
That was way too forced.
Kiyohime:
Tee-hee☆
--BATTLE--
Kiyohime:
I might or might not have heard about skulls being used as wonder drugs...
Kiyohime:
Master, would you care to use one?
Fujimaru 1:
Absolutely not.
Fujimaru 2:
No, thank you.
Kiyohime:
I suppose not.
Shall we depart?
E：???:
Heh, heh, heh...
It seems my next guest has finally come.
F：???:
Hee, hee, hee, the next guest is no one special.
All the most important guests seem to have arrived.
F：???:
Which is why this will be my very first and last love song.
Hmm, how melancholy.
F：???:
However, I doubt this is the last fool to come.
Oh fleeting Master, shall I just call you Oxygen?
E：???:
Oxy... What?
Truly, you say the strangest things sometimes...
E：???:
Anyways, even if this is both my first and last, that makes it all the more real for little ol' me!
E：???:
All the preparations are complete for me to make my grand entrance, right?
F：???:
Leave it to me, the food's all cooked!
It's my seven-spice blend chicken-turkey! It's delicious!
E：???:
Impressive... I hired you under the exaggerated boast that you were an all-powerful maid, but it seems you actually are all-powerful...
E：???:
Ah, but little ol' me will handle the main dish.
Be sure to leave some for me.
F：???:
Le...Leave that? Severed...meal? And... What meat now?
Stop using all these hard words, you lizard.
F：???:
But somehow, I understood it all. It's my habit to eat every bit of my breakfast. Namu Amida Butsu.
E：???:
Namu... What?
F：???:
It's a fancy phrase in Japan.
F：???:
I use it to mean, “Please forgive my brutality and depravity, for I am naught but a brutish beast.”
E：???:
...You're pretty knowledgeable sometimes, you know...
E：???:
Well, anyways.
Has everyone been dispatched?
F：???:
Good to go. Surrounded on all sides. You'll wait here with all the grace of a proper castle master, won't you?
E：???:
Yes, that way I can enjoy this banquet to the fullest.
E：???:
...
...
E：???:
Wait, I do have some free time after all...
Maybe little ol' me ought to go and meet them too?
F：???:
Hmm, I'll kill you then?
E：???:
I-I was just joking! Joking!
I just thought I'd try!
Section 3: The Woman of Mirage
Mash:
Senpai, I'm sensing a Servant.
Kiyohime:
Yes.
Make sure you stay behind me, my husband.
Mash:
Um, did you just say “my husband?”
Kiyohime:
I did. Why?
Mash:
Oh, um... No...
I was just wondering if that was the right term...
Dr. Roman:
By the way, the original Japanese for husband means
“a person who looks after you,” so I think it's okay to use for either a man or a woman.
Dr. Roman:
Isn't that great, Fujimaru?
Fujimaru 1:
No, no, no.
E：???:
La-la-lah♪
E：???:
It's a lovely night, isn't it everyone? A young, sweet night. Are you a young, bitter [♂ man /♀ woman], I wonder?
Kiyohime:
I-I sense a wicked woman!
Get back, my husband! Get a billion miles back!
Fujimaru 1:
Yup, sounds like a great idea.
Dr. Roman:
Heh, you just want to get away from Kiyohime, don't you?
Kiyohime:
Say that again?
Dr. Roman:
Nothing! Nothing!
Fujimaru 2:
I won't be able to come back, though.
Kiyohime:
Oh, you're so shy, Master... No matter how far away you are, I'll always come get you♡
Fou:
Fou... Fooouu...
Mash:
“This is bad, like Anchin bad...” Is that what you said?
Mash:
That won't do, Fou. Even if it's something everybody knows, this is where you keep quiet.
E：???:
Oh my, hehehe!
What cute guests we have!
E：???:
Welcome to our fantastic Halloween party!
My name is Mata Hari.
Mata Hari:
We have quite the party lined up for you tonight.
I hope you enjoy yourselves.
Mata Hari:
I'll get things started off with a dance.
One moment... (Strip, strip)
Kiyohime:
!?
Fou:
Doufo—u?!
Mash:
Wait a second!
Why are you taking off your clothes!?
Mata Hari:
Well, that is my specialty.
Kiyohime:
Ahhhh!
Indecent! Filthy! Lewd!
Kiyohime:
M-M-M-M-M-My husband! I will slay this indecent woman! How dare she show her bare skin!
Mata Hari:
Oh my, oh my!
Hehehe, if you prefer to do it that way, that's quite fine.
Dr. Roman:
...Tch.
(Silently deactivates recording mode.)
Mash:
Doctor?
Dr. Roman:
I didn't do anything. Not a thing.
Unfortunately, it's time for combat.
Dr. Roman:
Every party needs dancers.
Everyone, fight to your heart's content!
--BATTLE--
Mata Hari:
Is the opening act done yet?
It's my turn now.
Mata Hari:
Behold the power of Mata Hari, the woman with the Eyes of the Sun! ...I guess that's a good opening.
--BATTLE--
Mata Hari:
Oh my, I lost.
You may proceed.
Mata Hari:
There's still much more song and dance for you to enjoy!
Mata Hari:
Deluxe to your heart's content!
Mash:
Servant Assassin has retreated.
Mash:
...Good.
It appears the party's just getting started.
Kiyohime:
Should I make my wedding reception something like this?
Fujimaru 1:
I-I don't know...
Kiyohime:
Get your act together.
This isn't just my problem, you know?
Fujimaru 2:
I'd like a quiet ceremony.
Kiyohime:
Oh my! I was just thinking the same thing!
Kiyohime:
I was just about to say that I didn't want a flashy ceremony!
Dr. Roman:
My, there's certainly a sense of hopeless despair in knowing that the result will always be the same, huh Fujimaru!
Section 4: Queen of Blood-Soaked Tomatoes
E：???:
Oh my...
What a pain.
E：???:
Why do I have to clean my own castle?
E：???:
This isn't... This isn't a job for nobility!
Argh! Out, damned spot! It's not coming out!
E：???:
I keep rubbing it and rubbing it, but it's like a pig who won't squeal no matter how much you whip it!
Mash:
...There she is, Senpai!
It's the wicked witch from the fairy tales!
Fou:
Fou, fooouu!
Fujimaru 1:
Shh! Be quiet, Mash!
Fujimaru 2:
You seem happy, Mash.
Mash:
Oh... Sorry, I wasn't thinking.
We have to be sneaky, right Master?
E：???:
Damn this stupid spot! I'm all out of patience!
Take that! Phantom Maiden!
E：???:
There. Blew the whole thing to pieces.
That'll do. Good job, me.
E：???:
I am one of the most famous vampires on the planet...
I must be terrifying, beautiful, and merciless!
E：???:
...It's so noisy outside, though.
How many fireworks are they setting off?
Kiyohime:
Oh my, how ugly!
She's like a Berserker, almost!
Kiyohime:
Look, my husband! She's not putting in any effort!
Of course, my cleaning skill is A+++ rank.
E：???:
Ahhhh!
H-How long have you people been there?
Mash:
Um, Kiyohime... I don't remember you having that skill.
Kiyohime:
I do. Look, I can burn burnable trash, and non-burnable trash. With my mouth.
Fujimaru 1:
That's not cleaning.
E：???:
–You saw me, didn't you?
You saw the dark, bloody banquet of Carmilla!
Dr. Roman:
Did you guys see a bloody banquet? I didn't...
Carmilla:
There was a banquet! You guys just couldn't see it!
I cooked the tomatoes!
Mash:
I see... That's why your nails are red.
I was sure that's the real—Ahem. Excuse me.
Mash:
This is a theme park of dreams.
Only unhappy fairy tales are allowed here!
Mash:
Anyway Carmilla, why are you getting so heated over cleaning?
Carmilla:
...Humph.
That stupid girl ordered me to.
Carmilla:
Aarrgh! Why does the Grail even exist?
Why did I end up a Servant?
Mash:
The Grail? You mean THE Grail?
Fujimaru 1:
It's in this castle?
Fujimaru 2:
What idiot put it in this castle!?
Carmilla:
Yes. You may not believe it, but it's true.
Its power is what forced me to do this.
Kiyohime:
Oh my... That must be terrible.
But—How fascinating.
Kiyohime:
If the Grail grants a Servant's wish, then...
Hehehe... If I can get my hands on it...
Kiyohime:
Fufufufufufu!
Fou:
Fou, fo—u!
Carmilla:
...I know I can't be one to talk, but don't you think she's as dangerous as the fireworks outside?
Dr. Roman:
Hahaha. She's more of a landmine than a firework.
Kiyohime:
Silence, you.
Kiyohime:
So far, I've been playing tourist, but now my goal has changed.
Kiyohime:
I'm going to defeat the mistress of this castle and get the Grail. You're okay with that, right, my husband?
Fujimaru 1:
(Shakes head in a certain direction.)
Fujimaru 2:
(Shakes head in a certain direction.)
Kiyohime:
Oh my! You're so happy you shook your head both up and down AND side to side.
Kiyohime:
Enough talking, then.
Kiyohime:
You, Servant whose name I don't know.
Will you lead us to the mistress of this castle?
Carmilla:
You think I will?
I, Carmilla the Vampire?
Carmilla:
My role is to entertain the guests.
Now—enjoy this blood-freezing terror!
--BATTLE--
Carmilla:
That concludes my warm-up.
Glad to see you have spirit, pigs.
Carmilla:
After I've brought you to your knees, I'll collar you and keep you as pets.
Carmilla:
Of course, as my slaves you'll have to clean for me!
Carmilla:
Now, are you ready? I'll use my Phantom Maiden to paint the walls with your blood!
Mash:
Um, wouldn't that just make an even bigger mess?
--BATTLE--
Carmilla:
Grr... That stupid dragon girl with her songs and dancing... No true noble would do such a thing...
Carmilla:
Hehehe, but perhaps this is for the best...
Oh, I'm about to...
Carmilla:
GYAN!
Kiyohime:
No slacking off from your cleaning by playing dead.
Carmilla:
(Sob, sob...)
Kiyohime:
So the dragon girl's got the Grail, huh?
I wonder what she wished for.
Kiyohime:
Well, I can guess.
E：???:
I see. So both Mata Hari and Carmilla have fallen.
Are the little [♂ Puppies /♀ Deerlets] suffering?
F：???:
Of course. Life itself is suffering.
Most people are always suffering.
F：???:
But at the same time, most suffering can be alleviated with the softness of a paw, or perhaps a tail.
F：???:
In other words, they don't suffer that much at all.
By the way, do we have enough carrot cake?
E：???:
–I see. Then make them suffer more.
More cruelty! More despair!
E：???:
That's the most important part of this Halloween party!
F：???:
First I've heard of it, but sure thing!
Kitty's ready for the banquet!
E：???:
Now come, little [♂ Puppies /♀ Deerlets]!
Come to me!
E：???:
I'll give you a welcome to make you wish you were never born!
Section 5: Secret Joy of the Impaler
Vlad III:
–Hmm, so you made it this far, huh?
Vlad III:
Carmilla went easy on you...
Or perhaps not.
Vlad III:
Very well then. I grant you the honor of fighting with Vlad Tepes, the Dracul.
Kiyohime:
Oh my. We actually ran into a serious warrior for once.
Class-wise, he's the same as me, though.
Kiyohime:
Of course, no Berserker can rival me in elegance and breeding.
Vlad III:
You make me laugh, man-eater.
Your sin will scorch you from within.
Vlad III:
Both you and I have trod a wicked path.
Know that neither of us shall return to the light.
Kiyohime:
...That kind of ticked me off.
You will pay dearly for that.
Vlad III:
Of course. This is a banquet, a place for entertainment!
And so—
Vlad III:
Even the jesters must give it their all.
Vlad III:
As the ruler of a nation, I know the importance of festivals. Man needs circuses as well as bread.
Mash:
Wow... He's so serious! He's the one person who doesn't get the mood for this event!
Dr. Roman:
In a sense, he's a true Berserker...
The only sane man in a world of the insane.
Vlad III:
—I find that a touch rude.
I consider myself a gentleman with a sense of humor.
Vlad III:
Mata Hari's dance was one of mirth.
Carmilla's dance was one of suffering.
Vlad III:
I would like to add a dance of my own, a dance of blood...
Vlad III:
But I must beg your forgiveness.
I'm afraid I'm much better at embroidery.
Mash:
...Embroidery?
Your hobby is embroidery?
Mash:
Did you make that splendid regalia yourself?
Vlad III:
Hahaha! How kind of you, milady.
But no, this was the work of a special tailor.
Vlad III:
I wanted to try my hand at it myself, but I had my position to think of.
Vlad III:
Young girl, if you like, I shall give you a lesson later.
Vlad III:
An applique of a praying man would decorate your master's clothes well.
Mash:
Vlad!
Vlad III:
But first, we must attend to the battle.
I've been asked to “hype up this party,” you see.
Vlad III:
And the best way to liven up this banquet, I believe–
Is with your screams.
Vlad III:
Let us begin with an appetizer.
Eat, as your bones scream in pain!
--BATTLE--
Vlad III:
Indeed, banquets are splendid.
It was worth going along with that girl.
Kiyohime:
...So it's “that girl” after all?
Vlad III:
Of course. Out of all Servants, there are few who could spread such sweet delusions without shame.
Fujimaru 1:
No, I think there are probably a lot...
Fujimaru 2:
Well, I'm sure there's plenty...
Kiyohime:
Oh my... Master.
Your passionate gaze... It's making me blush.
Dr. Roman:
No, this isn't such a simple matter.
Dr. Roman:
Even with the Grail's power, for a Servant to summon another Servant...
Vlad III:
Be not afraid, foreign mage.
We simply—answered the summons ourselves.
Vlad III:
What she found was only a tiny sliver of the Grail.
It lacks the power to incinerate eras.
Vlad III:
She probably found it by chance during your battles at Orleans.
Vlad III:
It must be the blessing of God that it was entrusted to the most harmless Servant there.
Kiyohime:
...She doesn't seem harmless to me.
Vlad III:
She has the mind of a child.
Vlad III:
She's a very immature Servant who takes her childish thoughts and makes them real.
Vlad III:
She acts neither for good nor evil, nor for dreams or greed. She simply seeks her own entertainment.
Vlad III:
...But that's why it is fine.
Her entertainment is a pure joy, unlike ours.
Vlad III:
I know of it myself. Before I became the dragon who defended my nation, I, too, was once a father.
Vlad III:
Now, it's time for me to fight for real.
Vlad III:
My stakes have found their place in history.
And now you shall feel their wrath!
--BATTLE--
Vlad III:
...Hmmph. Enough, I suppose.
Mash:
...He's barely scratched, isn't he?
Fujimaru 1:
I can't believe I survived that.
Vlad III:
Of course.
I'm the only one who's being serious here.
Fujimaru 1:
I was serious as well!
Vlad III:
Splendid, splendid. My work here is finished.
Vlad III:
Now then...
Keep playing along until the end.
Vlad III:
She seemed so worried about whether or not you would come.
Kiyohime:
Oh dear. You're much nicer than you look.
Sure you're not related?
Vlad III:
...I'm simply taking pity on a comrade.
It's harder than you think, always being called a vampire.
Kiyohime:
Whew, I'm so tired...
And my throat is parched, too.
Kiyohime:
My husband, would you happen to have any cough drops?
Fujimaru 1:
Here you go.
Kiyohime:
Thank you!
Kiyohime:
We're giving each other cough drops now...
We're practically married!
Mash:
I wouldn't say that.
I'm the one who provided that cough drop.
Kiyohime:
I see... A pity.
Kiyohime:
Either way, so far we've dealt with Mata Hari, Carmilla, and Vlad III.
Kiyohime:
That's quite a few, but there might be more Servants who wish to join in on all the fuss...
Fujimaru 1:
There's one thing I know for sure.
Both:
–?
Fujimaru 1:
I've got a bad feeling about this.
Mash:
Same here...
Section 6: Hyper Enthusiastic Maid Cat
Tamamo Cat:
RAAAAWWRRR!
Raging Cat-Dou-Ken!
Tamamo Cat:
Yo! I am Tamamo Cat!
Tamamo Cat:
My (temporary) Master, it's time for you to take me for a walk!
Dr. Roman:
You know, you look really tired...
Fujimaru 1:
It's tough to keep up with these people.
Fujimaru 2:
Don't worry. I'm fine.
Kiyohime:
...She just showed up without any warning whatsoever, didn't she?
Tamamo Cat:
Hmph. Don't compliment me, snake-girl.
Or shall I use your kimono to sharpen my claws?
Kiyohime:
That wasn't a compliment.
And stay away from me.
Tamamo Cat:
Hmph. You aren't complimenting me, and you want me to leave. So one of us has to die, then?
Fujimaru 1:
Let's talk about this first.
Fujimaru 2:
Hold on a second.
Tamamo Cat:
Yup! We need conversation, a heart to understand!
That's it, my (temporary) Master! You get it!
Tamamo Cat:
So, I'll fill you in.
I'm busy, so I'll make it quick.
Tamamo Cat:
I'm a guard. My job is to set the Halloween traps,
and cook the jack-o'-lanterns.
Mash:
Oh, you eat those, huh?
Tamamo Cat:
It's good.
Tamamo Cat:
But at Chaldea, it's only the second-best dish.
It's just a lowly spirit, but man does it stink!
Tamamo Cat:
Ahahahahaha!
Kiyohime:
Dealing with her is so tiring. It's impossible to believe she's related to my texting buddy Tamamo–
Kiyohime:
No, maybe she's...
Maybe she's like this at heart, too?
Kiyohime:
The kind who will happily break the rules in a serious setting?
Tamamo Cat:
All right! It's party time!
Here we go! It's the FINAL BATTLE!
Tamamo Cat:
Now, my (temporary) Master!
It's time for pumpkin ghost pies!
Tamamo Cat:
Eat till you're ready to go BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
Tamamo Cat:
By the way, no poison in these, but here's a tip...
Tamamo Cat:
One of these pumpkin ghost pies was made by my current Master, woof!
Fujimaru 1:
So it's really got poison in it?
Fujimaru 2:
So it's Russian roulette?
Kiyohime:
I see.
No wonder you have nothing but bad vibes!
--BATTLE--
Tamamo Cat:
Nwahahaha!
I said it was just one, but I lied!
Tamamo Cat:
There's actually a few more, including my failed creations! Make sure you eat them this time, woof!
--BATTLE--
Tamamo Cat:
Now it's time for me to join in on the Russian roulette!
MEOOOWW!
Mash:
Oh, her purrs sound ordinary!
I think she's getting bored!
--BATTLE--
Tamamo Cat:
Meow! I came! I saw! I conquered!
Why's that hottie so fat?
Kiyohime:
You lost, Tamamo Cat.
Tamamo Cat:
What... That's surprisingly white...
How about we say I won the battle and won the war?
Kiyohime:
You lost the battle, and lost the war, too.
Tamamo Cat:
Then I lost everything!
How can I face my employer?
Tamamo Cat:
I know. Since I can't face her, I'll betray her!
How about I lead you straight to the goal?
Fujimaru 1:
Sure thing.
Tamamo Cat:
Hm... A moment ago, we were trying to kill each other,
and now you trust me? Isn't that a little too generous?
Tamamo Cat:
Anyway, all aboard the Tamamo Cat Train!
Choo choo!
Fujimaru 2:
You're very dedicated.
Tamamo Cat:
Yup. Being a guide is my real job, after all!
Did you like that, my (true) Master?
Tamamo Cat:
Now, I shall lead you to the mistress of the castle,
the mastermind who sent you the invitation, woof!
Tamamo Cat:
Her true identity is—
Meh. You probably figured that out already.
Kiyohime:
Hah... We finally made it, huh?
Kiyohime:
I know exactly who it is—
but what I don't know is why.
Kiyohime:
What is that idiot dragon girl thinking, I wonder?
Section 7: Melody Just for You
Tamamo Cat:
Former Master! Former Master!
Are you ready?
F：???:
J-Just give me a second! Okay, that's good, this is good,
and that's... Probably good!
Tamamo Cat:
RED LIZARD!
F：???:
Who are you calling a lizard? I'm a dragon!
I said give me a second!
F：???:
...I think we're all good!
Okay, open up!
Mash:
All right–
Kiyohime:
Here we come!
F：???:
–Hahaha, you're here, my little [♂ Puppies /♀ Deerlets]!
Wait, all you people came too?
Kiyohime:
Huh? Huh?
This is–
Mash:
Senpai's...personal room?
Fujimaru 1:
It's not this messy!
Fujimaru 2:
It's filled with pumpkins!
F：???:
You seem surprised, [♂ Puppies /♀ Deerlets].
F：???:
That's right. While you were fighting,
I used the power of the Grail to redecorate.
Mash:
The Grail can do anything, can't it?
F：???:
...Come on, aren't you surprised?
Mash:
I'm sorry?
Kiyohime:
At what? I'm very surprised to see this connection to my husband's room.
F：???:
Not that!
Indeed, 'twas I who sent that mysterious invitation!
Elisabeth:
The beloved, blood red Caster idol, Elisabeth Báthory!
Elisabeth:
I'm still a newbie idol, but I've got a bright future!
My singing and acting abilities are (someday going to be) known worldwide!
Elisabeth:
You could say that I'm a major idol on the verge of her big break! Feel free to be blown away!
Mash:
Wow. (Applauding.)
Fou:
Fou, awoo, ooh!
(Agreeing.)
Elisabeth:
Hey!
I'm starting to think you don't mean it.
Elisabeth:
Can't you be more, I don't know, enthusiastic?
Fujimaru 1:
It's hard when it's so obvious.
Fujimaru 2:
This isn't a surprise!
Elisabeth:
No surprise?
After all the effort I put into hiding my identity?
Elisabeth:
I had a silhouette and everything!
I even changed my voice!
Kiyohime:
Yes, but you gave yourself away by using Castle Csejte as your setting.
Elisabeth:
Oh.
Mash:
You didn't notice that, did you? I thought not...
Elisabeth:
Oh dear...
It's hard, being too famous.
Kiyohime:
Not that famous, really.
Well, that doesn't matter at all.
Elisabeth:
It does matter!
The surprise is ruined!
Kiyohime:
IT! DOES! NOT! MATTER!
Anyway, I had a question for you, Count Dracu-dumb.
Elisabeth:
Count Dracu-dumb?
Kiyohime:
Just answer me.
...What are you after?
Elisabeth:
What am I after?
Kiyohime:
Yes. Why did you make us fight those Servants in the prison castle? What was your goal?
Elisabeth:
Oh, you don't get why?
Kiyohime:
...Nope. Not a clue.
Elisabeth:
Very well. If you insist–
I may be willing to tell you.
Fujimaru 1:
I bet it's something dumb.
Mash:
...Yes. But let's play along and let her finish, Master.
Elisabeth:
Mata Hari, Carmilla, Uncle Vlad, and Tamamo Cat here.
Elisabeth:
They're all powerful Servants who gave you everything they had. So now you must be tired, yes?
Mash:
Well, yes... It certainly was a difficult battle...
Elisabeth:
An exhausted [♂ man /♀ woman] at the end of a long journey.
There they reach an eternal paradise, where they find–
Kiyohime:
...Where they find?
Elisabeth:
They find happiness! That's right, the bluebird of happiness is right next to you!
Elisabeth:
Your reward for this Halloween night's dream is myself–
Elisabeth:
A one-night only concert, sung by Elisabeth Báthory in my little [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]'s room!
Elisabeth:
Tonight, and only tonight, I! SHALL! SING! LOUD!
Elisabeth:
Well? Surprised?
Moved to tears? You're moved to tears, right?
Mash:
...
Kiyohime:
...
Dr. Roman:
...
Tamamo Cat:
Yes, I know what you all want to say, everyone.
Don't hold back. Let it all out.
Mash:
U-Um, Elisabeth?
Elisabeth:
Hmm? What is it?
Mash:
You could have just come to Chaldea, you know...
Elisabeth:
What? Of course not.
That's no fun.
Elisabeth:
Listen. An idol's concert is a once-in-a-lifetime deal.
Elisabeth:
You brave the winter snow and summer heat,
lining up for your tickets.
Elisabeth:
You line up just to buy merchandise, you get packed into a crowded concert hall.
Elisabeth:
As the diva's serenade brings you to the heights of ecstasy and madness, you fall in love!
Dr. Roman:
Yes, quite right. You're quite right, Elisabeth.
The job of an idol in the first place is to...
Mash:
Doctor, if you don't want me confiscating your laptop,
please shut up.
Dr. Roman:
Yes, I'll shut up.
Lady Elisabeth, please continue!
Elisabeth:
Oh, may I?
Umm, then—Ahem.
Elisabeth:
So, you see? It's important for an idol to keep their fans waiting. So...
Elisabeth:
If I just showed up in my little [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]'s room and started singing, I'd be a heartless demon, right?
Elisabeth:
My songs only truly shine after a long and perilous journey.
Elisabeth:
I couldn't deprive you of such a woooonnnderful feast for the ears!
Mash:
So you didn't send the invitation to Csejte so that we could enjoy a Halloween party...
Mash:
...but so that Master could listen to your songs?
Elisabeth:
Correct. It was a cruel trial, to make my songs all the more wonderful. Splendid, yes?
Kiyohime:
Oh. My. That. Is. Amazing.
Kiyohime:
Our reward. For four Servant battles.
Is one of your songs.
Elisabeth:
EXACTLY!
(Dazzling smile)
Kiyohime:
My head. Has overheated. With rage.
And something else.
Mash:
K-Kiyohime! Get a hold of yourself!
Kiyohime:
M-My husband... Kiyohime is done for...
Something within me that must never snap has snapped.
Fujimaru 1:
Hang in there!
Fujimaru 2:
You can do it!
Kiyohime:
Sob... I'm telling the truth, and you're so cold to me...
But I know that's what a Master is, now...
Kiyohime:
That aside–You! Count Dracu-dumb!
Kiyohime:
At this point, what's the difference between defeating four Servants and beating the stuffing out of five?
Kiyohime:
I'll incinerate the lot of you!
No dust left! No ash left!
Elisabeth:
Huh? Huh? Why are you mad at me?
Argh! Don't burn down the stage!
Elisabeth:
That's more of a death-y metal-y thing!
Tamamo Cat:
Oh, you wanna fight?
Okay, then.
Tamamo Cat:
I summon the pumpkin heads I called to liven the place up! Now the whole concert hall's full!
Tamamo Cat:
Now, my (true) Master and my (temporary) Master!
I'm exhausted, but it's time for the concert!
--BATTLE--
Kiyohime:
Hehehe.
I'm in top condition tonight!
Kiyohime:
I feel like I could ignite flames of love just by meeting someone's gaze!
Kiyohime:
My husband!
Look deep into my eyes, please!
Elisabeth:
Splendid! Wonderful! This wasn't what I anticipated,
but it was a lot of fun anyway!
Elisabeth:
I'm really getting into this!
I feel like my songs–can save the world!
Elisabeth:
It's time for the finale! I am Caster Elisabeth!
–Listen to my true song!
--BATTLE--
Elisabeth:
Aah... That's enough singing.
I'm so satisfied...
Mash:
Holy Grail confirmed! Recovering!
Elisabeth:
That felt so good!
Elisabeth:
Songs truly are the noblest art, and idols are Phantasms created by the stars!
Fujimaru 1:
...
Fujimaru 2:
...
Kiyohime:
My throat's parched, but worse, my ears hurt...
Kiyohime:
It's not even remotely fair that Count Dracu-dumb is in better shape than us.
Tamamo Cat:
A poisonous snake can bite their own tail and still survive, after all.
Fujimaru 1:
...
Fujimaru 2:
...
Mash:
...Master, this wasn't quite what I expected, but we did manage to recover a fragment of the Grail.
Mash:
If we take this back to Chaldea, we'll gain a valuable source of magical energy.
Mash:
So all that's left to do is go home.
Mash:
Or, wait. This is your room,
so perhaps we don't even need to do that?
Mash:
My head feels so dizzy I can't think...
Fujimaru 1:
—
Fujimaru 2:
Tamamo Cat:
Hey, question for you guys.
Tamamo Cat:
My (temporary) Master looks like they've got a bad case of the shakes. They okay?
Mash:
Huh?
Oh! M-Master!?
Kiyohime:
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!
My husband! Hang in there, my husband!
Elisabeth:
The heat from the concert got to them...
I understand that. Perhaps it was too good.
Tamamo Cat:
No, that doesn't seem right.
But I decided not to say so.
Kiyohime:
Are you okay, my husband?
Fujimaru 1:
Maybe I'm okay?
Fujimaru 2:
I'm okay, maybe?
Kiyohime:
Oh, the question mark means you're not lying, right?
We still have to be careful.
Kiyohime:
Please stay still, and rest your head, heart, and ears.
Fujimaru 1:
My ears...
Fujimaru 2:
I think something happened...
Mash:
It's because you experienced Elisabeth's concert up close... Probably.
Mash:
Just think of it like trying out a torture device...
Fujimaru 1:
That's crazy!
Fujimaru 2:
Good idea.
Mash:
Yeah.
Elisabeth:
Well, my little [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]?
My concert was wonderful, wasn't it?
Fujimaru 1:
I've had my fill.
Elisabeth:
Yes, yes, you're right.
Elisabeth:
You're never going to have a private concert like this again! Probably.
Elisabeth:
It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience!
Of course you've had your fill!
Mash:
Um... I think that meant,
“Please, make it stop. I'm begging you.”
Tamamo Cat:
Ssh! Stay quiet and she'll think this is a happy ending, woof!
Elisabeth:
Worry not, my [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]! You may have had your fill,
but there's always room for cake!
Fujimaru 1:
Um, what do you mean?
Fujimaru 2:
Y-Yeah.
Elisabeth:
And so–
Elisabeth:
Time for the encore! First up is my (in a sense) legendary debut single, “Love is Dracul”!
Fujimaru 1:
...
Mash:
...M-Master!
Don't die on me, Master!
Kiyohime:
Oh, jeez! Dracu-dumb here is unstoppable when she's singing, isn't she?
Elisabeth:
Wake up, my [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]!
[♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]!
Elisabeth:
Good, good. Good morning, my [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]!
Elisabeth:
What? In the idol business we say
“good morning” no matter what time it is.
Elisabeth:
You enjoyed Halloween, right?
I had a great time!
Elisabeth:
...
...Umm.
Elisabeth:
So, um, well...
I'm not sure if it's the power of that Grail or what, but...
Elisabeth:
...But I forgot how to get home.
So can I stay with you, my [♂ Puppy /♀ Deerlet]?
Elisabeth:
You wouldn't leave a little lost dragon out in the rain, would you?
Fujimaru 1:
Oh, fine...
Elisabeth:
Really? Yes! It was worth asking!
Man, this new Master's a pushover!
Elisabeth:
What? Who am I to talk?
Hey, I'm no pushover!
Fujimaru 2:
Are you sure about this?
Elisabeth:
I am sure!
I even gave up my prison castle for you!
Elisabeth:
Huh? Then it's okay?
You're asking me if I'll stop being bad?
Elisabeth:
Of course, I'll stop being bad!
...Wait, did I ever do anything bad?
Elisabeth:
Anyway, the contract is made!
Elisabeth:
I may not be an official Servant,
summoned at Chaldea, but...
Elisabeth:
...I'll do my best to serve you, so do your best to raise me, Master!