GUDAGUDA Meiji Restoration

Prologue: GUDAGUDA Civilization and Enlightenment

A:Nobbu:'s springtime.

Okita: We're going to have to put away the kotatsu soon.

Fujimaru 1: You two are still here?

A:Nobbu: Don't be such a lame. Besides...

A:Nobbu: Last time, during the “Super GUDAGUDA Honnoji: Ginormous Spring Celebration Incident,”

A:Nobbu: the super Demon King of the Sixth Heaven awakened just in the nick of time... Yep! It was my awesome heroism that made that event the success it was!

Okita: Uh...that was not a real event. On the other hand...

Okita: At the end of “Super GUDAGUDA Shinsengumi: Okita's Grand Victory”...

Okita: ...a tan me unleashed a mega-powerful beam attack that was absolutely amazing!

A:Nobbu: Hah! Now you're just talking crazy. You don't have an Alter, and everyone knows you can't beam.

Fujimaru 2: No! Don't put it away!

Okita: Ah, I knew that Master would appreciate the transience and imperfection of the kotatsu! Now, come, you can sit next to me.

A:Nobbu: Hey! Don't push! You're kicking me! Sheesh, stay on your own side!

A:Nobbu: ...And hey, where's my mandarin?

Okita: Um, it's April. Mandarins are out of season.

Okita: Hey, speaking of April, did you play the special April Fools' game?

Nobunaga: Why would I!? If it isn't Nobunaga-focused, then I'm not interested!

Mash: Senpai! There's an intruder in Chaldea!

Mash: Oh, Nobunaga and Okita. You're...still here...

Mash: ...Wait a minute! Why are you two lounging in Senpai's room!? M-may I join you?

Nobunaga: Still as foxy as ever, eh, Demi–I mean, Boobie Servant? So, what do you want? What's with all the ruckus?

Mini Nobu: Nobbu!

Nobunaga: there still a dark version of me lurking around? We did just do the revival event the other day.

???: Argh! Move, you weirdo creature! You're mega creepy! ...Wait, creature?

Fujimaru 1: Who's there!?

???: I'm glad you asked! Chacha is a mysterious masked warrior hailing from another dimension who has come to warn you of terrible impending doom!

Fujimaru 2: A masked man!?

???: I'm no man! Chacha is a mysterious masked woman hailing from another dimension who has come to warn you of terrible impending doom!

Mash: it?

C:???: Huh? How did you know Chacha's name!? Do you have eeyespee?

Okita: Chacha...I've heard of her. I believe she was the concubine of Toyotomi Hideyoshi, the man who unified Japan during the Sengoku* period. (*TL Note: Sengoku=Warring States)

Okita: She was the daughter of Nobunaga's younger sister, Oichi. The eldest of the three Azai Sisters, she led a kinda...ill-fated life.

Nobunaga: Hey! Don't you turn into a history nerd on me! Wait a minute. Chacha...are you THAT Chacha!?

???: Hm? I hear a familiar voice... A-Auntie!? I thought you got torched by Akechi in Honnoji!?

Da Vinci: Sorry to butt in when you're all getting excited, but this reading I'm picking up... It's one we've seen before...

Da Vinci: Remember? The most awkward of all readings analyzed in Chaldea's history? The Guda Guda Particles.

Da Vinci: Explaining would be boring AND painful, so how about you just imagine for yourselves what they do and go with that. See ya☆

Okita: You really suck with our event infodumps. But I guess it's okay. Simplicity makes it easier!

Fujimaru 1: Can't we get a more detailed explanation...!?

Fujimaru 2: The newbies need to know!

Mash: You KNOW what we're talking about, Senpai! It's “that thing”!

Mash: It's the completely terrifying Guda Guda Particle... Servants it contaminates turn into utter disappointments!

Mash: Senpai, let's get out of here quickly! If we don't hurry, even I risk turning into Mashy-Mashy!

Chacha: Looks like you're all on the same page now! Come with Chacha if you want to live!

Chacha: ...Um, by the way, are you the Master from that Chaldea place?

Fujimaru 1: I'm Fujimaru, Master of Chaldea, yes.

Chacha: Umhm! Good answer! And you've got a good expression on your face! If Chacha says so, it must be true!

Chacha: Happy? YOU'RE HAPPY RIGHT?

Nobunaga: Argh! Forget about it! Just hurry up and get us outta here!

Nobunaga: I wanted to watch “Get Stella-ed If You Laugh: Chaldea” on TV tonight!

Fujimaru 2: I'm liking the mask and helmet combo. It's cool.

Chacha: Eh!? Cool? I heard that the world of today was dangerous, so I sneaked into His Highness's storage house and took them.

Chacha: D-do I look good in them? R-really? Tee hee... Chacha looks good in anything anyway!

Okita: Yes, yes. I have a feeling this is going to be another painful ordeal, but just leave everything to me again, Master!

Mash: I shall support you from behind the scenes, Senpai!

Chacha: Then let's go! Off to some crazy-weird realm Chacha doesn't understand at all!

Okita & Nobunaga: What!? You don't understand it!?

Section 1: Blackbeard Arrives

Edward Perryeach: Dufufufufu... Open up–

Nobunaga: Fire!!!

Edward Perryeach: My role was brief but glorious!

Edward Perryeach: My dream of opening up Nippon...and setting up a Pirate Market in Zipangu...!

Nobunaga: Welp, all done! Let's go home and watch some TV.

Nobunaga: So Chacha, what time period are we in anyway?

Chacha: I don't really know, but it doesn't seem like the one Auntie and Chacha lived in; ours was much further back in the past.

Chacha: ...Wait! That guy wasn't the problem!

Mash: ..It seems like it's 19th-century Japan. Around the end of the bakufu*, I think. (*TL Note: bakufu=shogunate)

Okita: The end...of the shogunate...

Fujimaru 1: Hey, that's when Okita was alive...

Okita: Yes, it seems like it was just yesterday, yet it feels so long ago... Something about this feels slightly different, though.

Chacha: But that's not what I'm talking about! Chacha didn't come to get your help because of that wacky-looking barbarian.

Fujimaru 2: Pre-Meiji Restoration...

Chacha: Meiji Restoration? What's that? Cultural reform? A cheat event in modern-day Japan?

Chacha: I see. Well, Chacha isn't interested!

Chacha: Hmph! Who cares about that. Chacha came to you to solve an even greater crisis!

Nobu Tank: Chacha. Detected. Nobunobu! Capture. Chacha. Nobunobu!

Nobunaga: Eh? Me? A tank? Why am I a tank?

Nobunaga: And, you guys can talk!? Did you evolve on your own!?

Chacha: They found me!

Chacha: N-no! Chacha does not want to go back there!

Chacha: There's nothing in that castle anymore!

Okita: I'm sure this is all Bad Nobbu's fault, but let's just defeat it! Please stand back, Master!

Chacha: Since it's come to this, Ch-Chacha will also help.

Chacha: Ha! Touch Chacha, and you'll get burned! Literally!


Chacha: Th-that was a close one! I express my thanks to you, Fujimaru! Chacha will pat you on the head! Hup! Huuup!

Chacha: Argh! I can't reach! Lower your head, you insolent fool! Read the room!

Fujimaru 1: Like this?

Fujimaru 2: Understood!

Chacha: Hm. You're cute. Chacha is a very tolerant individual, and I like kiddos who are obedient like you!

Chacha: But don't fall for me. Chacha is a cute, loving, and popular character type, so to you mass-produced normies, I'm an unattainable prize like from a carnival!

Mash: Um, but aren't you a child yourself?

Chacha: What!? Don't act all big just because you have big boobies! Chacha in her heyday was all va-va-voom and boin-boin!

Chacha: It's not my fault I got summoned as a loli Berserker!

Chacha: Uwaa? Chacha's a Berserker!? Wh-how!?

Local Fisherman: Whoa, you guys are amazing. First you get rid of that funny-looking foreigner, then you destroy that mechanical doll from the bakufu.

Local Fisherman: Honestly, ever since the Oda Bakufu took over last week after defeating Lord Tokugawa, there's been nothing but fighting. I'm sick of it.

Fujimaru 1: Eh?

Fujimaru 2: Huh?

Okita & Nobunaga: Oda Bakufu—!?

???: So you found Chacha... And who were those people with her?

Mini Nobu: Nobunobu! Nobunobu!

???: ...Riiight... I haven't the slightest idea what that was supposed to mean.

???: ...Whatever. It doesn't matter who they were. No one can interfere with my plans!

???: That's right, Chacha... Your pathetic scrambling is pointless!

???: This world belongs to me, Oda Nobunaga–the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven!

Section 2: Nobbudamon Incident

Nobunaga: Here we are. Kyoto.

Nobunaga: So let me get this straight... Without waiting for the Meiji Restoration, the Tokugawa Bakufu just up and vanished like food around that blue Saber.

Nobunaga: And instead, the Oda Bakufu popped up like kettle corn on Chaldea's movie nights?

Nobunaga: Ugh! I don't know who did it, but I will NOT allow a new bakufu if I'm not the one who made it!!!

Nobunaga: Hm? This shop's shiruko desserts are the best!

Chacha: I want some, I want some! Chacha loves sweet shiruko soup! Stewing adzuki beans into a sweet soup is such a devilish idea!

Chacha: It's scary-good!

Okita: Shiruko has always been sweet...

Okita: Wait a minute. Did shiruko even exist during your lifetime, Nobbu?

Nobunaga: Yup. I picked up this guy once, real strange dude. He was a chef who made all kinda weird and exotic stuff.

Nobunaga: But the shiruko he made by stewing adzuki beans was exquisite! Oichi and Chacha both loved it!

Chacha: He dressed kinda weird, but he made delicious things, so Chacha loved him.

Chacha: But then he just disappeared one day... The horror.

Okita: Uh...this doesn't sound like a super-accurate version of history.

Purple-haired Tea Shop Girl: I'm glad you are enjoying my food.

Purple-haired Tea Shop Girl: Eh? Me? U-um...I am just an insignificant town girl, so please do not mind me.

Purple-haired Tea Shop Girl: I did it! My part is done! (Victory dance)

Okita: Huh? That flashy-looking girl seemed familiar...

Mash: Oh, Chacha. You're spilling your shiruko. Come on now, wipe your mouth, too. And Senpai, please have some dumplings.

Chacha: Hm. I thank you, boobie-somethingsomething.

Chacha: Hey. Your dumplings look good too. Hand one to Chacha! Gimme!

Nobunaga: What's with all the commotion?

Villager: Go take a look! The Oda and Shinsengumi folks are at each other's throats again!

Okita: ...The Shinsengumi!?

E:???: What's wrong with you!? Why are you getting in the way? You're being disrespectful to Oda Nobunaga, the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven!

F:???: Shut up... It's the Shinsengumi's job to get rid of that...thing. Now die, all of you... If not, you'll all be exterminated!

E:Oda Nobunaga?: Die or be exterminated? Eh? Isn't that the same thing? Just who is this fool!?

E:Oda Nobunaga?: Dammit! I will not allow the galling lack of respect you've shown to me, the great Heroic Spirit Oda Nobunaga!

E:Oda Nobunaga?: I am the unparalleled hero who will save Japan! Go, my elite Oda Bakufu goon squad!

Mini Nobu & Giant Nobu: Nobunobu!

F:???: Hmph. I don't care what you are! Just shut up and come at me!

Mash: That N-Nobunaga?

Chacha: Hm? Auntie is already here.

Nobunaga: Th-there's another one of me...!? And not the bad me?

Fujimaru 1: That one looks like a dude.

Fujimaru 2: Is it the real Lord Nobunaga? That means Nobbu is...

Nobbu: No, no. I'm the real deal! If you're talking about the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven, Oda Nobunaga, then I'm the one and only!

Mash: It's true that Oda Nobunaga is commonly regarded as male... Does that mean our Nobunaga was a fake?

Chacha: Now we are learning the real historical truth... Even His Highness had no clue that Auntie was a phony!

Nobbu: Et tu, Chacha!?

Nobbu: Argh! Okita! Say something! We're rivals, right? Tell them I'm the real Nobunaga!

Okita: ...That's... No, it can't be...

Mash: ...Okita!?

Okita: ...M-Mr. Hijikata! It IS you, isn't it!?

Hijikata: ...What's all this? ...Oh, Okita, it's only you.

Hijikata: Good timing. You go around from the right. Shinsengumi, advance!

Okita: I'm not ready! Wait, wait, what the heck's going on!? And who's the Nobbu lookalike!?

Oda Nobunaga?: Heh heh. I'm glad you asked! I am one who has returned from beyond the veil of death to this age of decadence...

Oda Nobunaga?: The Demon King of the Sixth Heaven, Oda Nobunaga!

Oda Nobunaga?: Oh-ho... So there's another me in this world. Who'd have thought it!

Oda Nobunaga?: Hm? Do I hear a voice that stirs feelings of nostalgia...and yet that I really don't want to hear?

A:Oda Nobunaga: What the what! It's you, Nobukatsu!

E:Oda Nobukatsu: Oh crap! Big Sister!?

E:Oda Nobukatsu: Arrrrgh...why are you here!?

A:Oda Nobunaga: That's my line! Why are you here!? And why are you calling yourself the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven!? And why did you make a new Oda Bakufu!?

Nobukatsu: Ack! Look, I have a perfectly good explanation. You see, the people cried out for a shining hero to save this world from its decadent ways!

Chacha: Now that you mention it, I think Mother told me that she and Auntie had a dead younger brother.

Chacha: At least I think she did.

Nobunaga: Doesn't matter! Younger brother or not, taking my name is outrageous! I shall properly punish him!

Hijikata: Hey, girlie. That's my prey. Hands off.

Nobunaga: Huh...? Who the heck are you? And do you know who I AM!?

Okita: Mr. Hijikata!? That Nobbu isn't the bad Nobbu...

Okita: Well, she's not exactly a particularly good Nobbu either...

Hijikata: Okita! When did you get so soft!? Are you planning on ending your life in shame!?

Okita: Just take my word and hold back for the time being, please! Nobbu, that's okay with you too, right? I beg of you too, Master!

Fujimaru 1: Let's all just...try and be friends here...

Fujimaru 2: (Sigh) What a mess...

Nobunaga: ...Hmph. Fine. First we deal with Nobukatsu. Nobukatsu, where are you camped?

Nobunaga: Lead the way. We'll talk when we get there.

Nobukatsu: Yes, Big Sister! This way! We, the army of the Oda Bakufu, will do our very absolute best! We'll work ourselves to the bone! Please show a little mercy!

Nobukatsu: Men, withdraw!

Mini Nobu: Nobunobu!

Hijikata: Tch. Fine. Okita! Back to headquarters!

Okita: Eh? Headquarters? As in, the Shinsengumi's? U-uh, well...

Okita: O-okay. Then, Master, please come with us!

Nobunaga: What? Fujimaru is obviously coming with me.

Okita: What are you talking about!? Master is coming with me to Shinsengumi HQ!

Nobunaga: Fool! Fujimaru is my retainer for all eternity!

Nobunaga: There's no way I'm handing Master over to a puny man-slayers club!

Okita: Who are you calling “puny”!?

Okita: Come, Master. To the Shinsengumi with me.

Nobunaga: No! Fujimaru is coming with me!

Chacha: Chacha knows what this is. This is what you call a lover's quarrel.

Chacha: Chacha knows all about it. I've seen my fair share of them. Many people fight over Chacha's affections.

Mash: Wh-what should we do, Senpai?

Fujimaru 1: Join the Oda Bakufu.

Nobunaga: Hm! That's my Master! Chacha, you come too! I will solve this matter in one fell swoop!

Okita: B-but...! F-fine! Well...even if you say you want to join the Shinsengumi later, I'm not gonna let you!

Okita: Waaah! Master, you lawless ronin!

Chacha: Goodbye. Now that I think about it, we didn't do any proper introductions, so farewell, frail-looking moe side character!

Fujimaru 2: Join the Shinsengumi.

Okita: Wonderful choice, Master. In that case, I shall train you until you are a worthy soldier of the Shinsengumi!

Nobunaga: Wh-what...!? Are you declining to be my retainer!? E-even Monkey was super excited to serve me!

Nobunaga: Fool! Even if you come groveling back to beg for my forgiveness, you... you may or may not get it!

Chacha: Auntie... What an unexpected fall from grace.

Chacha: Trying to be all tsundere isn't going to fly in this Azuchi-Momoyama period!

Chacha: Eh? Chacha's going with you because you seem more interesting.

Chacha: Actually, my feet hurt, so I just don't want to walk anymore.

Chacha: If you're going somewhere, give me a piggyback ride! Carry Chacha!

Mash: ...Th-this is turning out to be quite a bother, Senpai...

End Section: Let's Go, Our Oda Bakufu!

Nobunaga: Hahahaha! I'd expect nothing less from my Master! That puny man-slayers club is no match for us!

Nobukatsu: Impressive, Lord Fujimaru! Such wonderful manipulation of Big Sister!

Nobukatsu: With the funds we've collected, the new weapon for our great bakufu will soon be completed!

Fujimaru 1: I think I earned more than I meant to...

Fujimaru 2: I feel bad for Okita.

Nobunaga: Ha. I'm in a good mood, so I'll put dealing with Nobukatsu on hold for now. I'll think of a punishment after we beat that man-slayers club.

Nobunaga: Aaand on a totally different note, don't you think this tea room is gaudy? Isn't it too shiny? There's not an ounce of elegant taste here.

Chacha: This is the same as His Highness's golden tea room. It brings back memories, but it's too flashy! Makes Chacha's eyes hurt!

Chacha: Did Uncle Nobukatsu build this?

Nobukatsu: Eh!? Well, this room was given to me by our shogunate's sponsor, or something like that... Yeah, let's just go with that.

Nobunaga: What? So this is Monkey's preferred décor, huh? He did like sparkly things.

Nobukatsu: I have prepared your room the same way, Lord Fujimaru, so please make yourself at home.

Nobukatsu: Big Sister, if you will excuse me... I am heading out for a meeting with a weapons merchant. Goodbye!

Nobunaga: Hm. Do as you see fit.

Nobunaga: Okay! Maybe we should head over to that man-slayers club so we can make fun of their measly shack!

Chacha: Auntie, too mean!

Chacha: But that seems fun, so Chacha's going too! Fujimaru, piggyback! Piggybaaack!

Fujimaru 1: Sure...

Fujimaru 2: I hope Okita's okay.

Okita: Of course I'm not okay!

Okita: Thanks to this event, the Shinsengumi's tight on funds for the first time since its establishment! Well, okay, it's kind of always been that way...

Okita: All day long, we only eat a sad menu of rice with hot water and pickles... I wish I could have something sweet...

Hijikata: Quit your whining.

Hijikata: Rice with hot water and pickles is enough. It tastes fine.

Okita: No, I think you just stockpiled too many pickles.

Okita: I mean, what's up with the storehouse being completely filled with pickles!?

Okita: It should have been filled with military provisions! Honestly, spending all our war funds on pickles...!

Okita: Man cannot live on pickles alone!

Okita: Argh. How does it happen that Mr. Hijikata and I are the only members of the Shinsengumi to manifest in this world!?

Okita: This isn't the Shinsengumi... It's like the Shinsen-pair!

Hijikata: Shut up. There's plenty of members.

Mini Nobu?: Nobu!

Okita: For the last time, what exactly are these Mini Nobus!?

Okita: Eh? You're saying they're the righteous Mini Nobus who escaped because they started to question Oda's ways?

Okita: I didn't realize those things could be ambitious! Even if it's just a tiny bit...

Okita: Argh. If only Master had helped me out, something like this wouldn't have happened...

Okita: (Worried cough)

Fujimaru 1: Oh, hey, Okita. How are you feeling?

Fujimaru 2: Rice with hot water and pickles... How refined!

Hijikata: Hm? Aren't you...the brat hanging around Okita? What business does the dog of the Oda Bakufu have with us?

Okita: M-Master!? You came!

Okita: I knew it...I knew it... Master's too smart not to see what an idiot Nobbu is!

Nobunaga: WRONG! Couldn't be further from the truth!

Nobunaga: Fujimaru only came with me to make fun of this sad shack standing in this shanty city!

Nobunaga: Whoa, so shabby! This place really is sad! Okita, if you stick around here, you'll die of a common cold!

Chacha: Chacha also came to ridicule this place!

Chacha: Huh... So this is what it looks like. Touring the city and seeing old, sad ruins like this is so hip and fun! Even if it is with the Shinsengumi!

Okita: “Ruins”? “Shack”? You've gone too far this time, Nobbu! I will not allow you to deceive our purehearted Master!

Hijikata: Hey, quiet there. (Crunch crunch) If you're going to make a ruckus, do it outside. (Nomming on pickles)

Okita: Please say something, Mr. Hijikata!

Nobusengumi: Nobu, nobunobu!

Okita: Eh? What's this all of a sudden? Is there something you want to tell us?

Hijikata: Ah. The spy I sent into the city. Let's hear your report.

Nobusengumi: Nobu! (Hands letter)

Nobunaga: Spying? I didn't know you guys were smart enough to do such advanced things.

Nobunaga: Hey wait a minute... Where do you get off sneaking away to betray me!?

Hijikata: This is...

Hijikata: Okita! We're moving out! Prepare yourself! Quickly!

Okita: Eh? Did something big happen?

Hijikata: Yeah... Looks like some lawless ronin have gathered in a plot to torch Kyoto!

Hijikata: ...And the secret meeting site is...

Fujimaru 1: Could it be...!?

Fujimaru 2: I know!

Okita: ...The Ikedaya!

End Section: Go, Go! Everyone's Shinsengumi!

Okita: We did it, Master! It's been a while, but this is a great victory for me!

Okita: The Oda Bakufu is nothing more than a withering blossom that will bear no fruit. A weed!

Okita: But, thanks to Master collecting so much for our war coffers, the Shinsengumi has reached new heights of wealth and power!

Okita:, well, I'm kinda embarrassed to say that the Shinsengumi was never exactly financially stable. So this is like a dream come true!

Fujimaru 1: Hm, I think I ate too many apples.

Fujimaru 2: I feel bad for Nobbu...

Chacha: I'm sure Auntie's fine. Chacha has no reason to believe that, but Chacha does anyway!

Chacha: Anyway, the Shinsengumi's so boooring.

Chacha: Even your uniforms suck! Why don't you make them more sparkly!?

Okita: Heh... Chacha doesn't seem to understand the greatness of this mountain pattern.

Okita: Well, it's Mr. Kondou's design, and I guess it really was a bit too flashy. So Mr. Hijikata hardly wore it.

Hijikata: ...Shut it, Okita. How was today's patrol?

Okita: Oh, Mr. Hijikata, what do you think? What do you think of my Master?

Okita: As you can see, Master is of collecting funds, and we're not so great at it. Why not let [♂ him /♀her] officially join as a member?

Hijikata: Hmph. I'm not so sure about that. Hey, you. I don't mind a little fundraising, but report to me about it first!

Hijikata: If you don't, then...

Hijikata: SEPPUKU!

Fujimaru 1: O-of course! I'm all about communication!

Fujimaru 2: I-I actually used some to get materials...

Okita: I-it'll be fine!

Okita: As a senior officer, I will keep a watchful eye. Right, Master?

Hijikata: Got it. You...Try not to make Okita slice up her guts.

Hijikata: Well, what happened to your patrol? Get going!

Chacha: Sheesh. He looks scary, and he's so bossy.

Chacha: Well, Chacha wants to go shopping in the city, so let's go.

Okita: (Sigh) But the other officers...

Nobusengumi: Nobu!

Okita: For the last time, what exactly are these Mini Nobus!?

Okita: Eh? You're saying they're the righteous Mini Nobus who escaped because they started to question Oda's ways?

Okita: I didn't realize those things could be ambitious! Even if it's just a tiny bit...

Hijikata: We use the tools we have. There's no rule that says our officers have to be human.

Okita: Uh... Why would there even need to be a rule for that!? It's just common sense!

Okita: Argh. How is it that Mr. Hijikata and I are the only officers of the Shinsengumi to manifest in this world!?

Okita: This isn't the Shinsengumi... It's like the Shinsen-pair!

Okita: What do you think, Master? Only the First Unit has a captain, so there are a lot of open positions! You can't pass this opportunity up!

Fujimaru 1: I-I think I'd rather join as a trial member...

Okita: Oh...I see... Well, I can't force you. I will arrange it so that you join for a trial period.

Fujimaru 2: Your meal plan isn't exactly a selling point...

Okita: I'm sorry. Rice with hot water and pickles is Mr. Hijikata's favorite, so he's got barrels and barrels of it! An entire storehouse, in fact!

Okita: P-please bear with us for another...six months or so! That's when it'll all run out!

Okita: All right. I'm curious as to what Nobbu is doing right now, so shall we go on patrol, Master?

Okita: First Unit Captain of the Shinsengumi, Okita Souji, heading out!

Chacha: Ah! Sounds fun! Chacha's going too!

Chacha: Um... The Shinsengumi's super-important, cutest MVP Chacha, out!

Chacha: Should we slice something up for starters?

Fujimaru 1: Trial officer, also moving out!

Fujimaru 2: I wonder how Nobbu is doing...?

Nobunaga: How do you think, idiot!?

Nobunaga: The great Oda Bakufu is in financial trouble! As I was known as the Sengoku period's economics prodigy through my free markets and open guilds, this is just embarrassing!

Nobukatsu: Well, the idea of shaking down neighboring states because one is low on pretty much the oldest form of wartime economy...

Nobukatsu: Nowadays, being international–like opening up the country or achieving cultural enlightenment–is the way to go.

Nobunaga: Argh, don't talk to me like you know everything, you fool! And what's with this gaudy golden room!?

Nobunaga: The feeling's all off, and if you have money to spend on something like this, there's other things you should be doing!

Nobunaga: This wouldn't have happened if Fujimaru had just come to work for me...!

Fujimaru 1: Oh hey, Nobbu. How's it going?

Fujimaru 2: Whoa, is Kintoki your decorator?

Nobunaga: Well, well, if it isn't Fujimaru!

Nobunaga: I knew you'd get tired of being a man-slayer–with all that dumb murdering–and become a wanderer dedicated to helping others, fighting bad guys...

Nobunaga: ...and that in the end you'd come to the realization that you should have sided with Nobbu, and so come crawling back to me!


Okita: Master has come with me to patrol the city, and we just swung by to see what the Oda Bakufu stronghold looked like.

Chacha: Oh, and Chacha mostly came to shop, but also decided to check things out here!

Chacha: Whoa, this place looks gloomy...

Chacha: I'm so glad I didn't follow Auntie! Chacha can't handle being poor and stuff!

Okita: From the look of this place, the glory of the Oda Bakufu is long gone!

Nobunaga: Arrrgh! You puny man-slayer club dorks have no right to say that kinda crap! Nobukatsu! Hurry up and kick these folks out! Nobukaaatsuuuuuu!

Nobunaga: Hm? Where did he go? Argh, everybody keeps getting in my way!

Nobusengumi: Nobunobbu! (Hands letter)

Nobunaga: Eh? What's this? Nobusengumi? Hey wait a minute... Where do you get off sneaking away to betray me!?

Okita: What is it? A messenger from Mr. Hijikata? A letter? Well let's see... Th-this is...!?

Okita: Master! This is bad... Looks like some lawless roushi have gathered in a plot to torch Kyoto!

Okita: ...And the secret meeting site is...

Fujimaru 1: Could it be...!?

Fujimaru 2: I know!

Okita: ...The Ikedaya!

Section 3: GUDAGUDA Ikedaya Tumble

???: We have received the shipment, and the funds will be wired to your account.

???: Mmm. Leave the mass production to us from here on.

???: Hmph. My company's products are much higher quality, you know.

Saigou Edimori: What did you say!? Are you calling the United Satsuma Corporation's products inferior!? This volume, at these prices!?

Saigou Edimori: I am the great Saigou Edimori, king of the United Satsuma Corporation! How dare you speak to me so disrespectfully!?

Saigou Edimori: This is why bigheaded AC Choushu are so uncivilized...!

Katsura Tesla: Well, I'm only stating the truth. Choushu Industries' products are far superior in terms of specifications!

Katsura Tesla: Katsura Tesla, CEO, guarantees it!

Katsura Tesla: I would appreciate it if you wouldn't lump us together with DC Satsuma's draconian employment conditions. Don't you think a 23-hour workday is absolutely barbaric?

???: Please, both of you... Now is the time to cooperate in order to reach our mutual goal.

???: United Satsuma's production skills and Choushu Industries' mysterious engineering... With their combined power, nothing can stand in our way!

???: That's right! The ultimate union of technology: the SatChou Alliance!

Saigou Edimori: Well if that's how our sponsor puts it... In service of the greater good, let us put aside our personal grudges. Right, Katsura?

Katsura Tesla: Well, it is true that no invention would be possible without proper funding, Edimori.

???: Fortunately, we are financially stable, so I'm looking forward to further collaborations. Hee hee hee hee.

Okita: This is a raid!

Saigou Edimori: Huh!? Who's there!?

Okita: First Unit Captain of the Shinsengumi, Okita Souji... in the flesh!

Okita: You lawless roushi, I won't hesitate to slice you up if you resist!

Katsura Tesla: What!? The Shinsengumi!?

???: Oh crap... W-well then, I'm going to leave this to you SatChou leaders! I'm taking my leave!

Okita: ...You're not going anywhere!

???: Nobbu!

Okita: Wha...!? What the heck is this!? A Mini Nobu!? A robot!?

Saigou Edimori: Hahaha! Behold! This is the great United Satsuma's wondrous creation, the “MN-01”...also known as Mecha Nobbu!

Fujimaru 1: Mecha Nobbu... They actually made one!?

Fujimaru 2: Well, this isn't getting any less ridiculous.

Saigou Edimori: The best part is our production pace! We can make one every five minutes without so much as a drop of glue!

Saigou Edimori: At my factory, these are mass-produced round the clock with our 23-hour workdays! It all boils down to numbers when it comes to battle, people of Japan!

Okita: ...This is bad. There's just too many of them. Maybe splitting up with Mr. Hijikata wasn't such a good idea!

Fujimaru 1: We'll be fine as long as we have you, Okita.

Fujimaru 2: Let's scrap 'em before Hijikata shows up!

Okita: ...!

Okita: Leave this to me, Master!

Okita: Heh heh heh... My Kiku-Ichimonji shines with a different light tonight!


Nobukatsu: Whew. That was close. I almost got caught.

Nobukatsu: Who knows what would have happened if Big Sister had found out.

Nobukatsu: She'd just start throwing around stuff like seppuku all willy-nilly.

Nobukatsu: But if the SatChou lot manages to take her out for me, I can finally be the official head of the Oda clan!

Nobukatsu: My rise to power is inevitable now!

Nobunaga: You're right... Inevitable.

Nobukatsu: Yep, totally inev–

Nobukatsu: Oh crap! Big Sister!!! I-I, um, this is all according to keikaku... I-I mean, this is all just a big misunderstanding...

Nobunaga: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice... You may be family, but you've exhausted my patience! Nobukatsu! You just wait right there!

Chacha: Auntie... She's usually so soft on her family members... Even Ranmaru and Nagayoshi did whatever they wanted.

Chacha: Well, I guess it's time to pay the piper.

Katsura Tesla: Hold it right there, Mademoiselle Lord Nobunaga!

Katsura Tesla: Behold! The Blavatsky Research Institute and my Choushu Industries worked together to develop...

Katsura Tesla: ...the “MNN-01”! Also known as the Nobbu UFO!

Nobbu UFO: Nononono...bubububu!

Nobunaga: Nobbu UFO!?

Nobunaga: Argh, you're stealing my brand! You owe me for copyright infringement!

Chacha: Ewww, they're creepy!

Nobbu UFO: Nonoh!? Bubu!? (Crash)

Katsura Tesla: Ah! Stop! They may not look it, but the Nobbu UFOs are extremely fragile (psychologically)!

Katsura Tesla: So those schoolyard insults really sting!

Nobukatsu: That was helpful, Katsura Tesla! I knew Choushu was better than those useless, shouty Satsuma barbarians!

Nobukatsu: See you you-know-when, you-know-where, for the you-know-what!

Nobunaga: Ah!? Hold it, Nobukatsu! Argh, these weird UFO-mes are so annoying!

Okita: ...Haa!

Mecha Nobbu: Nobaaaaaah!?

Mecha Nobbu: Nobbu, nooobbu!

Saigou Edimori: Wahahaha! There's plenty more of them! Looks like you're running low on fuel... Care to give up?

Okita: (Pant...pant...) I'm still good! Master! Use a Command Spell! Let's get them in one swoo–

Okita: (Cough!?)

Fujimaru 1: Okita!?

Fujimaru 2: Careful, Okita, the stairs...!

Okita: Ah...!

Hijikata: ...What do you think you're doing, Okita? This is no time to fall asleep on the job!

Okita: ...M-Mr. Hijikata!

Fujimaru 1: We're saved!

Fujimaru 2: Okita...I'm glad you're okay!

Hijikata: Yes, hello. Fujimaru...was it? You've done well up until now. Leave the rest to us.

Hijikata: ...Everyone, draw your swords.

Hijikata: Let none escape!




Hijikata: Time to end this!!!

Mecha Nobbu: No...buuuuun...

Saigou Edimori: I-impossible... My entire fleet of Mecha Nobbus...eradicated... Annihilated!

Hijikata: Good... Tie him up. We'll interrogate him back at our base.

Nobunaga: Hey, are you guys all done here too? Looks like his buddy has given up too.

Katsura Tesla: Sending an Archer to attack Riders seems quite unfair. The Nobbu UFOs were dropping like flies.

Chacha: Chacha did good too! I shot flames out of my arms at them!

Chacha: Wait a minute! Ahhh! Why do flames come out of Chacha's arms!?

Hijikata: ...We'll interrogate that one at our place too. If you've no more business, begone!

Nobunaga: What!? That's our line. I'm taking that lion-head with me. You should be the one to skedaddle.

Hijikata: ...So you're trying to take all the credit.

Okita: Would both of you please calm down...

Okita: (Cough!)

Fujimaru 1: Can't we all just get along?

Fujimaru 2: Uh-oh...those two are...!

Saigou Edimori: Ah-ha! Now's my chance! Blinding Edimori Shoulder Flash!

Katsura Tesla: They don't call me the Fleeing Katsura for nothing! Behold! KT Body Flashbang!

Chacha: Whaah! It's bright! My eyes!!! Chacha's eyes!!!

Chacha: Ah! Chacha's mask to the rescue!

Saigou Edimori: Wahahaha! We shall say farewell for now!

Saigou Edimori: Note that my United Satsuma factory in Toba is rolling out tens of thousands of Mecha Nobbus as we speak!

Katsura Tesla: And Choushu Industry Technics in Fushimi is also currently conducting tests with an even more powerful weapon! I suggest you prepare yourselves!

Saigou Edimori & Katsura Tesla: Wahahahaha! We shall meet again!

Hijikata: Tch. This is all your fault. You let them escape...

Hijikata: So their headquarters is in Toba-Fushimi...

Nobunaga: Hmph. Either way, the Oda Bakufu's going to kick all of their butts.

Nobunaga: Fujimaru, we're leaving.

Fujimaru 1: But Okita is...!


Okita: I can...still...fight...

Section 4: Universal Battle of Toba-Fushimi

Chacha: How is she? Has her fever broken?

Okita: Master... Chacha...

Okita: I'm at...headquarters?

Okita: ...Oh right...this again...

Okita: Thank you for taking care of me... I'm fine now.

Okita: (Cough!?)

Chacha: Yes, you sound muuuch better. You just stay right there in bed and don't worry about a thing.

Chacha: Silly kids should listen to grown-ups.

Chacha: Chacha will watch over you and make you all better! You just rest as much as you want!

Fujimaru 1: Yep, you need to lie down.

Fujimaru 2: I'll bring rice porridge and pickles.

Mash: ...Senpai. Do you have a moment?

Fujimaru 1: Mash?

Fujimaru 2: Where have you been?

Mash: Sorry for disappearing so long.

Mash: ...It's just, while you were heading towards the Ikedaya, I asked Da Vinci to perform an analysis of this realm...

Mash: I'd rather not speak of it here. Is there somewhere we can talk privately?

Chacha: Hm? Do as you please. Chacha will watch over her. Chacha is the best at nursing people back to health.

Fujimaru 1: If you say so... Take care of Okita, then.

Chacha: Yes! Okita will get better in no time with Chacha on the case! If you want, Chacha can go on stage and sing lullabies.

Fujimaru 2: You're like a tiny mommy.

Chacha: Don't say dumb things like that! Is it just 'cause Chacha is a Berserker!?

Chacha: Just go do your thingy!

Mash: I had Da Vinci research this realm, and it apparently turned out to be a bit unusual...

Da Vinci: Hey, how's it going? I wasn't really interested in doing this, but Mash insisted, so I performed an analysis.

Fujimaru 1: What did you find out?

Fujimaru 2: Isn't it the usual mess of a realm?

Da Vinci: Well, I thought it was just like the last similar disaster you walked into, or just another Singularity...

Da Vinci: But let me cut to the chase: this realm is in a kind of stasis.

Mash: Stasis... Does that mean time won't go forward? It can't move into the future?

Da Vinci: That's right. That place isn't a Singularity of a specific point in history, nor is it a time in history that's been altered.

Da Vinci: It is just a single point in time that's unconnected to the past, and to the future.

Da Vinci: I initially thought it was some parallel world's history that got derailed somewhere along the line.

Da Vinci: But it's not. It's a world where time has stopped there, and ONLY there. If we think of human history as a narrative spanning thousands of volumes...

Da Vinci: ...then that world would be like a series that ended only a single volume. It is...entirely unrelated to human history.

Mash: A world that ends in a single volume...

Da Vinci: The Guda Guda Particle is a fuzzy concept, but this is actually the opposite... I can sense an unwavering will behind this.

Da Vinci: A strong will that's saying “it ends here,” or “nothing beyond this point is necessary.”

Mash: ...

Chacha: You dummy!

Fujimaru 1: That came from Okita's room!

Mash: Wait, Senpai!? We'll call you back, Da Vinci!

Hijikata: Wake up, Okita. It's time for battle. We are headed to Toba-Fushimi. The enemy has apparently gathered there.

Chacha: Shut up, you muscle-brained, man-slaying, scary-faced jerk! She's in no shape to move! Get out!

Okita: I-I'm all right...! A burning fever is nothing to the powerful, invincible Okita...



Hijikata: If you're coughing up blood, then you must have plenty to spare. Obviously your lungs are strong. Good, then. The Oda lot have already assembled. Let's go.

Chacha: No, no, no, it's not okay, dummy! ...And you too!

Chacha: Kids who catch a cold need to stay home and rest!

Okita: Thank you for being concerned for me, Chacha. But I...

Okita: I am the Shinsengumi's First Unit Captain, Okita Souji.

Okita: Now let's go, Master! I cannot allow Nobbu to be the only one to look cool!

Fujimaru 1: Okita...

Fujimaru 2: ...Got it. Let's go.

Chacha: ...Oh come on! You military stooges are all the same!

Chacha: What's the point of pride and honor if they just get you killed!?

Chacha: You're all stupid! Stupid stupidheads! No! You know what you are? Stupid dum-dum doodyheads!

Chacha: Argh! Chacha can't deal with you anymore! Chacha's gonna wreck all your dummy plans from now on!

Chacha: Oh, but first, here's some medicine for you, dummy, so take it after you eat! Brats!

Okita: Chacha...

Mash: I wonder why she got so mad...

Hijikata: Hmph. If she were one of us, she would have to commit seppuku for deserting us before a battle.

Hijikata: Whatever. Shinsengumi, moving out.

Mecha Nobbu: Nobu nobbuu!

Saigou Edimori: Wahahahaha! What do you think of the new and incredible robot army that my United Satsuma has mass-produced for us!?

Saigou Edimori: I had some time to tweak them a little, and so their production rate and performance went up by 20%! This is all thanks to our 24-hour workdays!

Katsura Tesla: I see you're still not at all timid about breaking labor laws!

Nobbu UFO: Nonononono bubububu!

Katsura Tesla: And my new Choushu Industries superweapon is finally out of its prototype phase and in official production!

Katsura Tesla: Even matchlock guns are no match against them!

Nobukatsu: This is the indomitable strength of the Universal SatChou Alliance!

Nobukatsu: Heh. This will be the end of Big Sister's reign!

Nobunaga: Why you... So many variants of me crawling all over the place...

Nobunaga: Hm? You guys are here too? What took you so long? Can't you see that the enemy's all locked and loaded!?

Nobunaga: Huh? Fujimaru, wasn't Chacha with you?

Fujimaru 1: She disappeared somewhere...

Fujimaru 2: Something happened right before we left...

Nobunaga: She was tending to Okita on her sickbed...!?

Nobunaga: I see... Oh, that Chacha...

Nobunaga: No matter. She'll be back when she gets hungry.

Nobunaga: And you're... Uh, Hijikata, was it? Of the Shinsengumi?

Nobunaga: Well, what's your assessment of the enemy, then?

Hijikata: There's too many... Our only options would be to pin them down with a feint, and then have a separate unit flank them...

Nobunaga: Oh-ho... I thought your little man-slayers club was all about playing at being soldiers, but maybe I was wrong. I had more or less the same idea, in fact.

Nobunaga: I guess you've got at least a little tactical sense.

Nobunaga: But you're a bit lacking in numbers.

Hijikata: ...So what? You work with what you've got... That is what war is about.

Hijikata: Okita, you'll flank them. I'll handle the feint at their front ranks.

Okita: Underst– (Cough!?)

Okita: N-no. It's fine! I'm fine!

Nobunaga: You are NOT fine.

Nobunaga: Just hear me out: I'll lead the feint attack from the front. It's the best fit. Most of my troops carry matchlock guns, and aren't that mobile.

Nobunaga: That leaves everyone else free for the flanking maneuver. What do you think? Pretty cunning, huh?

Fujimaru 1: A united front with Nobbu and the Shinsengumi!

Okita: I-I see... That is a good idea, especially considering the source... We ARE understaffed... What do you think, Mr. Hijikata?

Fujimaru 2: Eh!? Nobbu had a good idea!?

Nobunaga: What's that supposed to mean!? I don't wanna brag, but pretty much never lost a battle! (*Note: Nobunaga lost the battle of Kanegasaki, but we don't talk about that.)

Hijikata: ...Fine. I guess that'll be better than losing...

Hijikata: Nobunaga... After all your big talk, you'd better not mess this up.

Nobunaga: Of course. If you guys aren't careful, I'll take you all out together! So you'd better head out like you're planning not to come back!

Nobunaga: Fujimaru, what are you going to do?

Fujimaru 1: Cooperate with the Shinsengumi.

Okita: If Master's with us, there's nothing to fear! Hijikata, let's go!

Fujimaru 2: Cooperate with Nobbu.

Nobunaga: Haha! Now you'll get a real lesson in my famous Three Line Formation!!!

Nobunaga: This will be a glorious race to see who can win the greater honor on the battlefield!

Nobunaga: Matchlock troops, ready yourselves!!!

Hijikata: Yes, a race to glory! We will not lose to the likes of her! Shinsengumi, advance!

End Section: We Won! Oda Bakufu Finishes!

Nobunaga: Now! Push them out! Matchlock troops, switch out and reload for the next shot! My invincible Noble Phantasm, Three Line Formation, will finish this!

Mecha Nobbu:


Saigou Edimori: I-impossible...!?

Saigou Edimori: My United Satsuma-produced Mecha Nobbu unit is being completely annihilated!

Fujimaru 1: Whoa! We're holding them back!

Fujimaru 2: Nobbu! You're amazing!

Nobunaga: Of course! I am a tactical genius! Makes you wonder how come I don't have a better skill set, right? You know, it's never too late for that strengthening quest thing.

Nobunaga: Fujimaru, you've done well too! Even Monkey's never done such a magnificent job!

Nobunaga: Upon our victory, you'll be richly rewarded, and then make it DOUBLE! Wahahahaha! Unification under the great Oda Bakufu is so close I can taste it!

Nobunaga: We'll have a huge barbecue after-party at the temple when we're all done!

Fujimaru 1: Not at a temple, please.

Nobunaga: Eh? R-really? But I'll make some tea and everything...?

Nobukatsu: C-crap! She's too strong!

Nobukatsu: N-no, maybe it's because of that...whatsitsname...Fujimaru?

Nobukatsu: Is [♂ he /♀ she] helping Sis...?

Nobukatsu: Fine. Change of plans!

Chacha: Awww. So in the end, Auntie wins... I was all worried for nothing.

Chacha: Sheesh. Leaving Chacha behind like that to go fight? Rude! Why are warriors and adults all like that?

Chacha: Hm? Isn't that...Uncle Nobukatsu? Where's he running off to...?

Nobukatsu: ...Yes, I see... All we have to do is take out that Fujimaru [♂ guy /♀ girl]...

Chacha: ...Who is he talking to? Shoot, I can't hear that well...

Nobukatsu: Yes, that's right. If we can take care of that, Chacha can return to our great Taikou...

Chacha: ...!? T-Taikou...!?

Nobukatsu: Who's there!? ...Oh, it's you, Chacha. You caught me in a bit of an awkward position here...

Nobukatsu: Naughty Chacha...eavesdropping...

Nobukatsu: That's right. I was summoned to be His Highness Taikou's servant right from the beginning.

Nobukatsu: Now that you're here, I'm going to send you back to the castle.

Chacha: Taikou... H-His Highness is in the castle!?

Chacha: Th-that's impossible! His Highness is gone!

Nobukatsu: Oh, so you know. Death hasn't stopped either of us, has it?

Nobukatsu: That's because this is THAT kind of world...

Chacha: N-no, no, no, no, no!!!

Saigou Edimori: I've lost... I wasn't productive enough... Next time, I will try for 36-hour workdays...

Katsura Tesla: (Sigh) War is truly terrible. All that work, and we even got help from Ms. Blavatsky...

Nobunaga: Whew. It's finally done.

Nobunaga: Yes! Now that we're all done, I'll put on a private production of my favorite play, Atsumori, back at the temple for everyone!

Okita: Master! Nobbu! I'm glad you're both safe. We finished mopping up the enemy forces on our end as well.

Nobunaga: To hell with all that! This operation's success was pretty much all me!

Nobunaga: Ugh, it's so hard being me... That useless man-slayers club means I have to do ten times the work!

Okita: Whoa, those are fighting words.

Okita: And you, Master! Why didn't you come with us!?

Nobukatsu: All your bigheaded nonsense ends here, Big Sister!

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu! You again!? What the heck!? Is it your life's work to be an annoying obstruction!?

Nobukatsu: Oh of course not. I am only doing what the true head of the Oda clan should be doing.

Nobunaga: I see... The head of the Oda clan, you say. I will not permit such talk, even from my own brother!

Nobunaga: I hope you know what you're getting into.

Nobukatsu: U-uh, ahh! No, wait...! I'm a remarkably different person this time around! Can you still be so arrogant, even in the face of THIS!?

Chacha: ...

Fujimaru 1: Oh no!

Nobunaga: Chacha!? Is she unconscious?

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu... How could you stoop so low!?

Nobukatsu: And my true master is within that castle! The Great Gold Demon Taikou, Toyotomi Hideyoshi!

Nobunaga: Toyotomi Hideyoshi...

Nobunaga: Is it really Monkey!?

Okita: sparkly... That is a seriously garish castle...

Okita: Wait, that's probably not what matters now... What are you going to do with Chacha!?

Nobukatsu: I shall see you at the castle, Big Sister!

Nobukatsu: Or rather, “Big Fool of Owari”!

Nobunaga: Stop!!!

Nobunaga: ...Nobukatsu. Damn you...

End Section: The Key to Victory is Shinsengumi!

Hijikata: Now! Draw your swords and attack! Destroy them all!

Okita: Death to SatChou! Special attack: Mugen Sandanzuki (AOE Noble Phantasm version)!

Nobbu UFO:

Nono, bubbuu!

Fujimaru 1: Amazing, Shinsengumi!

Hijikata: Quit dozing off, newbie! Push forward until we reach their general!

Fujimaru 2: Eh? AOE Noble Phantasm?

Okita: Oh, that was just a figure of speech. Anyway, I am in top shape right now! I'm feeling so strong, I might even start shooting beams today!

Okita: Eh? I can't? Oh dear...

Katsura Tesla: How could Choushu Industries' superweapon, the Nobbu UFO, be defeated by a bunch of common, low-tech troops?

Okita: With Master and me working together, this is a cakewalk!

Okita: Mr. Hijikata, don't you think Master deserves a promotion to captain?

Hijikata: Hmph...don't lose focus. The battle's not over yet!

Nobukatsu: Wh-what the heck? That man-slayer rabble is too strong! Cannons and light beams aren't hitting them at all!

Nobukatsu: N-no, maybe it's because of that...whatsitsname...Fujimaru?

Nobukatsu: Is [♂ he /♀ she] helping them...?

Nobukatsu: Fine. Change of plans!

Chacha: Awww. So in the end, those dorks win... I got worried for nothing. Huh... I wonder if she took her medicine.

Chacha: Sheesh. Leaving Chacha behind like that to go fight? Rude! Why are warriors and adults all like that?

Chacha: Hm? Isn't that...Uncle Nobukatsu? Where's he running off to...?

Nobukatsu: ...Yes, I see... All we have to do is take out that Fujimaru [♂ guy /♀ girl]...

Chacha: ...Who is he talking to? Shoot, I can't hear that well...

Nobukatsu: Yes, that's right. If we can take care of that, Chacha can return to our great Taikou...

Chacha: ...!? T-Taikou...!?

Nobukatsu: Who's there!? ...Oh, it's you, Chacha. You caught me in a bit of an awkward position here...

Nobukatsu: Naughty Chacha...eavesdropping...

Nobukatsu: That's right. I was summoned to be His Highness Taikou's servant right from the beginning.

Nobukatsu: Now that you're here, I'm going to send you back to the castle.

Chacha: Taikou... H-His Highness is in the castle!?

Chacha: Th-that's impossible! His Highness is gone!

Nobukatsu: Oh, so you know. Death hasn't stopped either of us, has it?

Nobukatsu: That's because this is THAT kind of world...

Chacha: N-no, no, no, no, no!!!

Saigou Edimori: I've lost... I wasn't productive enough... Next time, I will try for 36-hour workdays...

Katsura Tesla: (Sigh) War is truly terrible. All that work, and we even got help from Ms. Blavatsky...

Hijikata: It's finally done. That took longer than expected. Okita! Collect the men. Shinsengumi, return!

Okita: Understood! Thank you as well, Master! Thanks to you, I only had three bloody coughing fits this time!

Fujimaru 1: You overexerted yourself...

Fujimaru 2: So that wasn't a C. Star collection skill?

Nobunaga: Oh? I'm surprised you were able to defeat the enemy on your own.

Nobunaga: And you, Fujimaru! Why didn't you back ME up!?

Okita: That's our line! The sound of gunfire stopped halfway through the battle. What were you doing, Nobbu?

Nobunaga: Well, you know, it started to rain, and our matchlocks got wet...

Nobunaga: Nothing I can do about that, right?

Okita: Sheesh... Well, now Nobbu can finally appreciate the true strength of the Shinsengumi.

Okita: This victory doesn't belong to me alone, but to all of the Shinsengumi!

Nobukatsu: That is enough of your ridiculous arrogance, murderers club!

Hijikata: You are...the clown from the Oda side...

Nobukatsu: Who are you calling a clown!?

Nobukatsu: Well, I suppose a lowly jumped-up farmer couldn't be expected to appreciate my noble attire!

Hijikata: What did you say? Come, say that to my face. Who did you call a jumped-up farmer...!?

Nobukatsu: Ah-ack!

Nobukatsu: U-uh, ahh! No, wait...! I'm a remarkably different person this time around! Can you still be so arrogant, even in the face of THIS!?

Chacha: ...

Fujimaru 1: Oh no!

Okita: Chacha!? Is she unconscious? Nobukatsu...why...?

Okita: Chacha is part of your family!

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu... How could you stoop so low!?

Nobukatsu: And my true master is within that castle! The Great Gold Demon Taikou, Toyotomi Hideyoshi!

Okita: Toyotomi Hideyoshi...? One of the Three Unifiers of Japan?

Nobunaga: Whoa... What the heck is that castle...? Yeah...that's definitely gaudy enough to be Monkey's castle...

Nobunaga: Okay, that's probably not important now... What are you going to do with Chacha!?

Nobukatsu: I shall see you at the castle, Big Sister!

Nobukatsu: Or rather, “Big Fool of Owari”!

Nobunaga: Stop!!!

Nobunaga: ...Nobukatsu. Damn you...

Section 5: The Secret Emiyamaru

A:???: Chacha...Chacha... Come back... Come back to me...Chacha...

Chacha: N-no! Chacha won't go back there!

Chacha: There's nothing left there...!

A:???: Your children are here too... Tsurumatsu and Hideyori... Come back... Everything you desire is here...

Chacha: N-no...!

Chacha: I don't wanna!!!

Nobunaga: That Nobukatsu... I never imagined he'd do something so stupid...

Okita: I'm worried about Chacha... Let's hurry, Master!

Okita: ...?

Okita: Mr. Hijikata?

Okita: What's with the scowl? I mean, you do always look like that, but still...

Hijikata: Demon Taikou... That voice I heard...

Okita: Mr. Hijikata...? Hello!?

Fujimaru 1: She's so friendly with him...

Fujimaru 2: Whoa, she's smacking Hijikata upside the head.

Okita: Eh? Oh, Mr. Hijikata, Mr. Kondou, and I go way back. We're like family.

Okita: When we were young, I used to make him cry all the time!

Okita: ...So what is it, Mr. Hijikata?

Hijikata: No...never mind.

Nobukatsu: Welcome, my elites of the Toyotomi Bakufu!

Nobukatsu: To be able to command so many generals is something only the great Gold Demon Taikou, Lord Hideyoshi, could do!

Gotou Sétanta: Hey, I have to deal with you guys again?

Mouri Medinaga: Shut up. I could say the same to you! And why am I this Mouri character again!?

Mouri Medinaga: Eh? This Mouri is completely different from the Mouri who ruled the Chugoku region? I don't care! I don't need to know inconsequential Warring States trivia!

Sanada Emimura: Hmph...the red-armored Sanada. I see that you and I are not unrelated. I do have a bit of sympathy for his story.

Sanada Emimura: His title–“The Land of the Rising Sun's greatest warrior”–may be a bit much for me, though.

Gotou Sétanta: You seem a little...overenthusiastic about this...and what's with that mask?

Sanada Emimura: Are you asking about my Rokumonsen? These are to pay the ferryman of the River Styx, which represents a Sanada warrior's resolve to—

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: I see. Thank you for that oh-sooo-interesting tidbit! But no more useless trivia!

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: We have assembled because we heard there is a Spring Saber Annihilation Festival being held to thin out the overpopulated Sabers!

Akashi Ex: ...And I suggest we ignore anything this silly girl says. Please, pay her no mind.

Akashi Ex: ... (Nom nom) (These Akashiyaki dumplings are delicious.)

Mouri Medinaga: I see we have two new faces!

Mouri Medinaga: Oh, but that girl in the black outfit is cute.

Nobukatsu: Now then, Sun Fortress Five! I'm leaving this place in your hands! I'm off to offer Chacha to Lord Taikou!

Gotou Sétanta: ...Um, are we good with this? The little lady will die...

Mouri Medinaga: She was so cute too... It's unfortunate, but there's nothing we can do.

Sanada Emimura: Ah...we Servants have no choice but to obey the one who summons us. And that man...

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: No, but still... Wait, more importantly, what's “Chousokabe”?

Gotou Sétanta: Hey. The enemy's here... My heart's really not in this, but I guess we don't have a choice...

Gotou Sétanta: Time to show you the fighting prowess of this so-called reincarnation of Marici!

Gotou Sétanta: ...I still don't know why I'm the only one with a childhood name, but whatever...

Mouri Medinaga: Hee hee... They'd better not underestimate the power of the Servants who got their animation updates!

Mouri Medinaga: When it comes to breathtakingly beautiful ☆3 Casters, I am the very best!

Mouri Medinaga: Not holding back with my Hekate Graeae will be wonderful stress relief!

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: I'm not really sure about this... Huh!? I'm detecting a crudely made, overproduced, inferior unit born of mass production Saber response!

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: How come Sakura Saber gets to be a ☆5 Saber and I'm stuck as an Assass–(Cough, cough)

Akashi Ex: (Huff, huff) (This shiruko is good, too.) Japanese sweets are wonderful... They fill my heart with sugary goodness.

Sanada Emimura: Hm...the enemy is coming from the front, while the castle that we must protect is behind us. We all know what to do.

Sanada Emimura: Hey everyone. Back away a bit. I'm doing this—

Sanada Emimura: ...I am the bone of my sword.

Gotou Sétanta: Hey, what the hell are you doing!? Whoa!

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: Th-this power...!?

Nobunaga: The more I look at it, the more absurdly overwrought this castle looks! As their former boss, I am embarrassed for them! They lack wabi! They lack saaabiii!

Nobunaga: Even the great Rikyu is spinning in his grave.

Okita: We've almost reached the Sun Fortress, or whatever it's called. That's where they're keeping Chacha.

Okita: Fortunately, it's situated on level terrain. Easy to attack, difficult to defend. This will be an easy win, Master!

Fujimaru 1: Um, actually...

Fujimaru 2: Is that...

Nobunaga: Hm? What's that sound? An earthquake?

Okita: Ehhhhhh!? Th-that's!?

Sanada Emimura: This is Sanada's pride and joy: Super Fortress...

Sanada Emimura: ...Emiyamaru!

Sanada Emimura: I have no intention of losing!

Nobunaga: What the actual hell is that!? Well, taking the castle's position into consideration, the fort's placement is tactically sound...

Nobunaga: That red-masked weirdo... He's not one to be taken lightly!

Sanada Emimura: Ha. Such praise from the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven is an honor!

Mouri Medinaga: Eh? Don't tell me you're a Warring States buff?

Sanada Emimura: No, but the Heroic Spirit that has fused with me is shouting within me. Shouting that I must protect that castle.

Gotou Sétanta: Yeah, I actually agree with you. I wonder why... This feeling... It's not really regret... It's almost like a sense of pride bubbling up...

Mouri Medinaga: I hate things like that! Things like pride and romanticizing warfare... Men are so dumb!

Mouri Medinaga: Although... Was I Mouri Medinaga? I do feel like I need to try my best here for some reason.

Okita: Mouri? Does that mean you're Choushu...?

Mouri Medinaga: Oh! Are we doing that bit now!?

Mouri Medinaga: No, I may be Mouri, but apparently I'm not THAT Mouri! Honestly, I don't really know the details.

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: ...Hee hee... This place will be the death of you!

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: The amazing Warring States Space Battlemaiden, Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X, shall punish the counterfeit Saber!

Okita: Chousokabe...? Which means...Tosa...?

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: Eh? Is that not my style? Am I not someone who says stuff like “KILL SABER” and that kinda thing?

Akashi Ex: ...X...just stop.

Okita: It doesn't matter! SatChou and Tosa must die! There will be no mercy!

Gotou Sétanta: I'm so glad we get to stay out of this for a change.

Sanada Emimura: Uh, I'm not sure if that's true.

Sanada Emimura: Anyway, you will all experience the true terror...

Sanada Emimura: ...of my Emiyamaru!


Gotou Sétanta: ...Sheesh. This went just like last time...

Gotou Sétanta: Oh, well. Nothing for it. Hey, next time can I at least go by something other than my childhood name?

Mouri Medinaga: Eh? Some say that it was Mouri, not Sanada, who was the true master of strategy in the Osaka battle?

Mouri Medinaga: I said I don't care!

Mysterious Chousokabe Heroine X: I can't believe some phony Saber defeated my Meteor Sword... It was all because we didn't make any decisions...

Akashi Ex: For my payment of Japanese sweets, I think I did good... (Nom nom) (Maybe I'll try out okonomiyaki on my way back?)

Sanada Emimura: Heh... I knew this would happen.

Sanada Emimura: I suppose we lost because I compromised the citadel's walls by driving spears through them to look cool...

Sanada Emimura: ...Hurry. You are the only ones who can save that girl.

Sanada Emimura: It seems the Heroic Spirit who has fused with me also wants that.

Okita: Sanada Emimura–no, Sanada Yukimura–is Chacha's...

Nobunaga: Eh? Who is this guy? Is he famous? Sanada?

Nobunaga: Oh, Sanada, the former retainer of Takeda? Now that you mention it, I think he left me his horse right before I died...

Nobunaga: I don't remember much but... Eh? His son?

Sanada Emimura: You've messed everything up. It's your fault that I had to go through hell... That's what the Heroic Spirit within me seems to think...

Fujimaru 1: That was a tough many ways!

Fujimaru 2: Sanada Emimura... “Greatest warrior” indeed.

Okita: A-anyway, all that's left is that Sun Fortress! Let's hurry, Master!

Nobukatsu: Sheesh... The Sun Fortress Five wasn't good for anything except buying a little time. Now I have to deal with Big Sister and the Shinsengumi...

Nobukatsu: No, wait! The real threat is you, Fujimaru! You're the one who unified the two groups!

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu! How dare you continue to scurry around causing mischief!

Nobukatsu: Hah! Unfortunately for you, the stalling was effective! Chacha has already been sacrificed and the Great Gold Demon Taikou has revived!

Nobukatsu: Now, behold! The paradise of death!

Nobukatsu: Radiant Demon Fortress of the Sun!

Nobunaga: Wh-what the...? Is space shifting?

Okita: ...Wh-what's going on!?

Section 6: GUDAGUDA Final Battle, Fortress of the Sun

Nobunaga: Is there...a huge amount of magical energy pouring out of Monkey's castle?

Nobunaga: Whoa!? That tasteless, shiny castle is getting even worse!

Okita: Wh-what is going on?

Hijikata: We saw this last time... Which means...

Mash: ...Senpai, we figured it out!

Fujimaru 1: Mash!? Eh? Are you calling from Chaldea?

Fujimaru 2: Wait, when did you...!?

Mash: There were a few things I wanted to look into, so I returned to Chaldea to analyze them with Da Vinci.

Mash: I'm sorry to have left you without telling you. But please forgive me, in the Guda Guda way...!

Da Vinci: Explain later!

Da Vinci: Let me get right to the point! There is a Demon God Pillar at the core of that demonic castle!

Nobunaga: A Demon God Pillar!? Weren't those things completely destroyed?

Okita: As in THOSE Demon God Pillars!? What does that mean...?

Nobunaga: Do you know why, Da Vinci!?

Da Vinci: Thanks for that to-be-expected reaction. Of course, I am a genius, after all.

Da Vinci: So what is there, to be blunt, is the corpse of a Demon God Pillar.

Da Vinci: Specifically, the carcass of the Demon God Pillar that died in that Singularity somehow ended up there, and somehow carved that space out of time itself.

Da Vinci: ...Or maybe it fled while it was near death, and ultimately made it there.

Mash: Whichever the case, we haven't been able to determine why it meddled with space-time there.

Mash: We do know that it is somewhat different than the ones we encountered before, so please be careful, Senpai!

Gold Demon Taikou Hideyoshi: I am Hideyoshi, the Gold Demon Taikou! An eternal golden paradise shall be created here!

Nobukatsu: ...Do you see, Big Sister!? A new almighty savior has been born from the Demon God Pillar's remnants!

Nobukatsu: And within this space, the Great Gold Demon Taikou is going to grant the blessing of eternity to mortals everywhere, and so save them all!

Nobukatsu: Big Sister, this will allow you to be free of the obligations that come with being an Oda, and you can go back to the carefree life you lived before!

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu... Did all this for me...?

Nobukatsu: Why, of course! Nobukatsu always has Big Sister's back!

Nobukatsu: Those dumb chief retainers of the Oda clan knew nothing!

Nobukatsu: Not acknowledging Big Sister because you were a woman!? Unforgivable! That's why I did all of this!

Nobukatsu: And as a result, you purged them all, and they became...that!

Nobukatsu: You're brilliant! You were the obvious successor of the Oda clan! There is no way I could have fulfilled that role!

Nobukatsu: ...Because I was incompetent!

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu...

Okita: Nobukatsu...

Nobukatsu: Now, everyone must die, and then eternity will be all that remains. The bonds of the Oda will be pointless!

Nobukatsu: There will be no need to think of the future! You just have to retain your current happiness!

Nobukatsu: If you don't eliminate neighboring states, your own state will be destroyed... We're forced to fight needless battles just for the sake of territory!

Nobukatsu: There's no need to return to that crazy era anymore!

Nobukatsu: Big Sister! Let us stay in this enclosed space and live our carefree childhood lives forever!

Hijikata: ...

Nobunaga: ...I'm sorry, Nobukatsu.

Nobukatsu: ...Eh?

Nobunaga: I drove you into a corner that time...

Nobunaga: If only I had made a decision sooner, I could have sent you to a temple where you may not have lost your life.

Nobukatsu: Wh-why...why are you apologizing? There should have been no question that the only one worthy to take over leadership of the clan was you, gifted as you are.

Nobukatsu: Father forced everything upon you! He is to blame! This is how it should be, Big Sister! You can be free now!

Nobunaga: Guess it can't be helped! Nobukatsu, I'm gonna have to put you in the ground.

Nobukatsu: ...What do you mean? I am trying to create a world where we can enjoy our lives like in our childhood...

Nobukatsu: I guess I have no choice but to convince Big Sister of the value of what I'm doing...

Nobukatsu: You can reflect on that while you're crushed in wave after wave of infinite carcasses! We have all the time we need!

Nobunaga: Sorry, Fujimaru, would you do something about all these flunkies?

Nobunaga: I'm gonna deal with my little brother personally.

Okita: Hey! Wait! Don't forget about me!

Okita: Whatever weirdness you're up to is none of my business, Nobbu. But maybe we can still save Chacha!

Nobunaga: Idiot... Hey, Hijikata of the Shinsengumi, was it? I'll leave you in charge here. You can handle this, right?

Hijikata: ...Hmph, shut your trap. You talk too much. No matter who we face, if they stand in the way of the Shinsengumi...

Hijikata: ...we will cut them to ribbons!

Nobunaga: No matter what the opponent, huh? Fine! I'm counting on you, Fujimaru!

Nobunaga: To hell with an eternal world for the Toyotomi Bakufu! Foolish! Listen up, Nobukatsu!

Nobunaga: A man's life is but fifty years... It is but a dream... in the great order of things.

Nobunaga: What makes humans so awesome is that they shine brilliantly in their short lives! Burn this image into your eyes, and your mind!

Nobunaga: Bear witness to how Oda Nobunaga, the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven, lives!

Section 7: Farewell, Loving GUDAGUDA World

Nobunaga: ...We're finally here.

Nobunaga: Ugh, they didn't hold back when it came to making more Mini Nobus.

Nobukatsu: ...I guess I was no match for Big Sister...

Nobukatsu: Why must I always fail so hard...

Nobukatsu: I'm so bad, sometimes I question whether I'm really related to Big Sister.

Nobunaga: Hey, don't say that. If there's anything to blame, it's the era we lived in. It's nobody's fault. It was just the times!

Nobukatsu: I suppose...

Nobukatsu: But I will accept any punishment Big Sister has for me. It is only right. Just do it quickly. I don't like pain...

Nobunaga: ...Very well. Goodbye, Nobukatsu.

Fujimaru 1: Wait a minute!

Fujimaru 2: Stay, Nobbu!

Okita: Nobbu...!?

Nobukatsu: Eh? Huh?

Nobukatsu: ...Big Sister?

Nobunaga: Geez. I really am a softie when it comes to family. Just who I am, I guess.

Fujimaru 1: Nobbu...I knew you'd do the right thing.

Nobukatsu: BIIIIIIG SIIISSSTEEERRR...! I...I...! (Cling)

Nobunaga: Arrgh! Don't touch me! That's disgusting! Besides, we still have another boss fight to deal with!

Okita: Oh yes... The remains of the Demon God Pillar–or rather, the Gold Demon Taikou!

Gold Demon Taikou Hideyoshi: I am Hideyoshi, the Gold Demon Taikou...! I offer eternal life...!

Nobunaga: Shut up, demon trash! And come on, Chacha! Take off that mask and wake up already!

Nobunaga: You and I share the same noble Oda blood! No Oda could ever die so easily! This shouldn't phase you at all!

Chacha: ...A-Auntie?

Okita: Chacha! What a relief! She hasn't been completely consumed!

Chacha: N-no, you don't understand, Auntie. This is all Chacha's fault. His Highness, Tsurumatsu, Hideyori...

Chacha: Those who had tried to protect the Toyotomi family...

Chacha: They are all blaming Chacha... Calling me the woman who destroyed Toyotomi... A horrible, wicked woman...! The obsession of a deranged Toyotomi!

Chacha: Those words are boiling up from within me... Just like that day...forever and ever!

Nobunaga: Ah, so that's what Monkey thinks...

Nobunaga: Listen, Chacha. I know Monkey very well. He was naive yet calculating, emotional yet unequivocal, and truly coldhearted.

Nobunaga: A man who was unquestionably two-faced, and yet he shone with glory. He was a man like the sun itself.

Nobunaga: It was only natural for him to succeed me as ruler.

Nobunaga: But there is one thing he couldn't do! And Chacha, you know very well what that is.

Nobunaga: And that is:

Nobunaga: He couldn't say no to the woman he fell for!

Chacha: Auntie...

Chacha: Th-that's right! His Highness was always kind to Chacha! Always and only to Chacha!

Chacha: So that voice I hear coming from the pillar is...!?

Gold Demon Taikou Hideyoshi: Why... Why do you refuse... Toyotomi... Your children... They can live on forever...

Nobunaga: And now our eyes are open to the tru–AHHH SO MANY EYES!!!

Nobunaga: Whatever. It's just a stupid jerk that tried to deceive and devour Chacha.

Okita: Huh, what do you mean?

Nobunaga: That thing really is the carcass of a Demon God Pillar.

Nobunaga: During the battle with Solomon, it must have developed some self-awareness.

Nobunaga: What happens when a living thing becomes aware of itself? Naturally, it begins to fear its eventual demise.

Nobunaga: While the other Demon God Pillars stayed on the battlefield following orders, this one fled its post... Because it wanted to live.

Nobunaga: However, weak as it was, it was unable to stave off death. And so it drew it last breath–here. Now, only its vindictive desires remain.

Da Vinci: Wait, YOU figured this all out? I mean, you're right... That's basically the residual thought patterns of a Demon God Pillar that took shape.

Da Vinci: It may just be a corpse that drifted here, but it's still a Demon God Pillar. Even that shell is a powerful magical tool.

Da Vinci: The Demon God Pillar resonated with the powerful desire not to die, then fused with that very desire and materialized as something similar to a Grail.

Da Vinci: It's like a nasty parasite. It can't maintain its existence without using the Spirit Origin of a Heroic Spirit as a catalyst.

Mash: So if we separate Chacha from it, this realm will go back to normal!

Fujimaru 1: Da Vinci, yes!

Fujimaru 2: Thank you, too, Mash!

Nobunaga: Let's put an end to this, Fujimaru!

Nobunaga: Chacha, we'll get you out of that piece of trash soon!

Fujimaru 1: Just hang in there, okay?

Chacha: Auntie... Fujimaru...

Chacha: Okay! Chacha will wait!

Chacha: Let. Go. Of. Chacha! Lemmego!

Chacha: Oh, right! Chacha can shoot fire from her hands. Wanna get burned?

Hijikata: ...Good. Sounds like the chitchat's done with.

Hijikata: All we have to do is slice it up, right?

Hijikata: THEN LET'S GET TO IT!!!

Okita: Mr. Hijikata... It's always like this with you...

Okita: Anyway, let's end this!

Okita: To be honest, I'm running kinda low on HP myself...

Okita: (Cough!?)

Fujimaru 1: Let's go, everyone! Final boss battle time!

Okita: Come, to the decisive battle!

Fujimaru 2: The Oda and Shinsengumi working together...We are the O-Shin Alliance!

Nobunaga: Hm! It's gonna get a taste of our powers combined!


Demon God Pillar Andras: I...I don't want to die... I don't want to die... I don't want to die this...

Demon God Pillar Andras: I just want to keep living...somewhere... Alone in my own world...

Demon God Pillar Andras: I don't need purpose. No ideals or conviction. No subjugation or rule. No pursuit or development. No camaraderie or parting... None of it.

Demon God Pillar Andras: I just...wanted to relish this newfound sense of self...a bit longer.

Chacha: Hm? Where am I...?

Chacha: Chacha remembers getting enveloped in flames that day...

Chacha: I see. So this is what hell's like...

Demon God Pillar Andras: I don't want to die... I don't want to die...

Chacha: Wh-what are you!? A D-Demon God Pillar!? D-don't come near Chacha...!

Demon God Pillar Andras: Chacha...? This record... You destroyed Toyotomi...? I see... You're going to die too...

Demon God Pillar Andras: I will die soon... And so I...I understand how you feel. Give me your hand... If I fuse myself with you, then we'll...!

Chacha: S-stop! Ch-Chacha is not the one who destroyed Toyotomi!

Chacha: Chacha tried to save Hideyori...!

Demon God Pillar Andras: were branded a liar, and a woman who brought destruction in later history... You are a fitting vessel for me to inhabit...

Demon God Pillar Andras: O woman who denies destruction, as one who turns her back on it, you are truly fitting as my accomplice.

Demon God Pillar Andras: O infernal princess, your powerful sense of shame was the beacon that guided me through the sea of death.

Chacha: N-no! Chacha isn't a destroyer! Or an infernal anything!

Chacha: Chacha...Chacha just...

Demon God Pillar Andras: ...Disappear... She will disappear... The woman who rejected destruction will never accept eternity.

Demon God Pillar Andras: ...I do not understand humans. Life is incomprehensible. But...

Demon God Pillar Andras: One thing has become clear to me. Biological activity without purpose is no true voyage; it is merely drifting...

Demon God Pillar Andras: ...And I...simply failed to properly order my goals and purposes in this brief existence...

Chacha: Th-that was a close one, Fujimaru!

Chacha: Good work saving Chacha! Make Auntie give you a reward!

Nobunaga: Cut the crap.

Nobunaga: We wouldn't even BE in this mess if you hadn't gotten yourself captured by that Demon God Pillar...

Okita: Now, now. All's well that ends well. We should be happy that everyone's safe and sound.

Nobukatsu: Well, Big Sister, I think this is goodbye...

Okita: Huh? Nobukatsu!? Why are you fading away!?

Nobukatsu: Well, you know, I'm pretty insignificant, so I don't exactly qualify as a Heroic Spirit.

Nobukatsu: It was only thanks to the Demon God Pillar that I was able to maintain my Spirit Origin.

Nobukatsu: You all went to great lengths to save me, but I think this is the end.

Nobunaga: Nobukatsu...

Nobukatsu: Oh come on, Big Sis. I am not the sort of brother who should be missed.

Nobukatsu: I'm the dumb little brother whose jealousy of his amazing Big Sister started this whole insurrection.

Nobunaga: I see... You're right...

Nobunaga: Okay, bye then!

Nobukatsu: Oh come on! I'm disappearing forever and THAT'S the best you can manage!?

Nobukatsu: Ah, Big Sister. Just one last thing.

Nobunaga: ...What is it? Come on, spit it out.

Nobukatsu: ...I leave THE REST to you, Big Sister.

Nobunaga: Wh-what!? Don't give me that crap, you dummy! Who uses the same last words TWICE!?

Fujimaru 1: Nobbu...

Da Vinci: Sorry to cut into this...“touching” moment, but...

Da Vinci: ...the Demon God Pillar that created this realm has disappeared. We'd better get you all out of there.

Mash: That's right! Please hurry, Senpai! If you stay there, like last time, the space will...

Mash: Oh? It's not collapsing...

Da Vinci: Eh? You're right. Why's that? Could there still be a shard of the Demon God Pillar somewhere?

Chacha: Eh!? Does Chacha still have a chunk of that weirdo thing on her, Fujimaru?

Nobunaga: ...No, that's not it.

Nobunaga: Right, Shinsengumi!?

Hijikata: ...Hmph. Seems that way.

Okita: Eh? M-Mr. Hiji...kata...!?

Epilogue: Shinsengumi

Okita: Mr. Hijikata... Why...?

Nobunaga: It's simple. That Hijikata Toshizo guy is also a Heroic Spirit that the Demon God Pillar summoned.

Nobunaga: ...Am I right?

Hijikata Toshizo: ...After hearing your conversation, it seems that way.

Hijikata Toshizo: On that fateful day, I was shot at Hakodate...and the next thing I knew, I was here. Does that mean the Demon God Pillar consumed me, too?

Nobunaga: Not necessarily. That thing called out for those who share its desires, and maintained this space.

Nobunaga: You're just one of the keystones that made this space, all the while being a Rogue Servant who didn't need the power of the Demon God Pillar.

Nobunaga: If it had consumed you, I'm sure this place would have been a much more hellish battlefield.

Nobunaga: Anyway! Your version of immortality doesn't seem to quite match up with the Demon God Pillar's.

Nobunaga: Isn't that right, Hijikata? You're the epitome of stubborn refusal to back down. Besides, you're not the kind of wuss who'd let someone else control your Spirit Origin.

Hijikata Toshizo: Heh. I suppose I should be honored to get a seal of approval from the lord of the Sengoku period.

Hijikata Toshizo: Oh hey. Now that I've got a good look at you, I can see you're quite a beauty.

Okita: This is no time to joke around!

Okita: Actually, if we can just talk Mr. Hijikata down, this'll sort itself out, and he'll come back to his senses, right?

Nobunaga: That's not possible. Even the Demon God Pillar couldn't release the man from madness.

Nobunaga: Hey, Hijikata... You didn't even realize you turned into a Heroic Spirit after you died, did you?

Nobunaga: You wandered that strange battlefield, all that time projecting your desires toward the Grail–toward the Demon God Pillar.

Nobunaga: The whole time, all you were thinking was: “I can't die here. I won't be killed until I win.”

Da Vinci: Probably. The Grail grants people's wishes. As the one who wished on it, his desire was what shaped that realm.

Okita: That can't be... Does that mean Mr. Hijikata intended to continue living, to embody the Shinsengumi forever...?

Hijikata Toshizo: I get it now... There was something...odd that I couldn't quite put my finger on. Now it's all clear.

Hijikata Toshizo: ...In other words...

Hijikata Toshizo: You're all trapped here until I die.

Hijikata Toshizo: Am I right, Demon King of the Sixth Heaven?

Nobunaga: ...Yeah.

Nobunaga: So what are you going to do, Okita? If it's too hard for you, I can do it...

Okita: Please be quiet, Nobbu!

Okita: Mr. Hijikata! Why!? Do you not realize that you've died!?

Okita: That's not right! Because... Because the Shinsengumi's already—

Hijikata Toshizo: Shut up, Okita!!!

Hijikata Toshizo: Listen to me! The Shinsengumi will never end...

Hijikata Toshizo: Kondou...Nagakura...Saitou... In the end, they were all gone.

Hijikata Toshizo: ...But don't worry.

Hijikata Toshizo: Me... As long as I'm around, the Shinsengumi will never end...

Hijikata Toshizo: Right here...!

Hijikata Toshizo: I am...!

Hijikata Toshizo: ...THE SHINSENGUMI!

Okita: No...!

Okita: You're... You're wrong...!

Fujimaru 1: No, THIS is Okita's Shinsengumi...! Here with us!

Okita: Master!?

Okita: Wh-what do you mean...?

Hijikata Toshizo: Well, well... You've got guts, newbie.

Hijikata Toshizo: Or rather, Fujimaru!

Hijikata Toshizo: You stand here, before ME, the Vice Commander of the Shinsengumi, Hijikata Toshizo...

Hijikata Toshizo: ...and YOU dare to tell ME where the Shinsengumi is!?

Okita: Master...!

Okita: That's right...! Right now, I am Master's sword!

Okita: Mr. Hijikata!

Okita: My makoto–my sincerity–is right here!

Hijikata Toshizo: Hey Okita, for someone who quit because she was sick, you're talking awfully big now.

Hijikata Toshizo: So be it. If you're ready to live and die by that belief, then rest assured, you'll have no mercy from me!

Hijikata Toshizo: Your banner or my Shinsengumi... We're going to decide which is the real Shinsengumi right here!

Hijikata Toshizo: Let's go!



Okita: ... (Pant, pant, pant)

B:Hijikata Toshizo: ...Your sword is still as deadly as ever.

B:Hijikata Toshizo: Ever since we were kids, I've always known the power of your sword...

Okita: Mr. Hijikata...! I... I...!

B:Hijikata Toshizo: I see... So, you've planted your banner at [♂ his /♀ her] side, then...

B:Hijikata Toshizo: But no matter what happens...

B:Hijikata Toshizo: Shinsengumi...will NEVER die!

Okita: ...!

B:Hijikata Toshizo: I'll be seeing you, Okita...

B:Hijikata Toshizo: You keep that makoto banner of yours flying high, Okita. Always.

Nobunaga: Sheesh. He didn't change one bit; not even at the end. Guy had some serious conviction, especially for a Berserker.

Okita: Mr. Hijikata...

Okita: Eh!?

Okita: Wait a minute! Mr. Hijikata was a Berserker?

Fujimaru 1: Eh? You didn't notice?

Fujimaru 2: Well, that was pretty convincing.

Okita: What? No! He was definitely a Saber, or even an Archer, right!? What kind of group would the Shinsengumi be if the vice commander were a Berserker!? Huh!?

Chacha: Hellooo! Chacha's being completely left out of the loop! Don't you think that's bad? BAD???

Chacha: No matter how you look at it, Chacha's obviously the real heroine here. So...really!?

Mash: Senpai, now that Hijikata has been defeated, the space around you is starting to collapse! Get back to Chaldea now!

Nobunaga: Oh, I forgot! Everyone, follow me! If we all get back safe and sound, we'll have a barbecue at the temple!

Chacha: Chacha wants to see Auntie's strange Atsumori play!

Chacha: It's creepy, but Chacha loves it!!

Okita: ...

Okita: ...Mr. Hijikata...

Okita: As long as my banner is still here...

Okita: I'll... I'll keep on fighting!

Fujimaru 1: Let's go...!

Okita: Yes, Master!

Hijikata: ...Well... I guess there's nothing left.

Hijikata: I can't hear the sounds of the battlefield. I can't even see the road that leads back to Hakodate.

Hijikata: Damn. That idiot Okita claims I died...

Hijikata: ...I see. So it's true; I did die...

Hijikata: I took off my haori, picked up a gun, and just...fought.

Hijikata: But in the end, I was driven to the far north...and wound up like this.

Hijikata: Pathetic. This feeling makes my stomach churn with rage so much, it feels like it might even be able to bring me back to life.

Hijikata: I haven't failed my makoto, yet my body has failed me. And that is...infuriating.

Hijikata: ...But not half as much as the fact that Okita, idiot that she is, defeated me...

Hijikata: Well, yeah...

Hijikata: The stupid girl, who sat on the veranda that day just staring absently up at the sky, acts like such a big shot now.

Hijikata: That's just how I remember her from Kondou's dojo... The girl we all laughed about because none of us ever thought we could beat her.

Hijikata: I'm glad I could see her like that again. Might as well steel myself and go... Hm?

Demon God Andras: ...Are you still here? This space is collapsing. You should leave before you get stuck.

Hijikata: You're a Demon God Pillar, right? I would have expected you to try and drag me down with you. But...are you concerned about me?

Hijikata: If only I'd been more compatible with you, this world would've been better fortified and defended.

Demon God Andras: Correct. That's nothing more than a regret now, though. But thanks to you, I did learn one thing.

Demon God Andras: To die while lamenting the life that has been lost...

Demon God Andras: That was the one saving grace I received as I gained self-awareness.

Hijikata: ...

Demon God Andras: But you are different.

Demon God Andras: I will disappear at the end of my drifting, while you will disappear at the end of your battle.

Demon God Andras: That is the fate that was engraved onto your Spirit Origin. And so, it is not yet time for you to die.

Demon God Andras: My beacon. My horizon. O Berserker soldier who witnessed the end of my drifting.

Demon God Andras: Keep fighting. Fight for the sake of your makoto, even though you know you cannot be saved.

Demon God Andras: This shall be your punishment for redeeming my evil, even for a brief moment, and my final wish made in this life.

Hijikata: ...Hmph.

Hijikata: ...There's no need to point it out. No matter how much I get beaten down, I'm the sort of stubborn ox who will keep fighting until I win.

Hijikata: I'm aware that the Shinsengumi may never win in history. I remained a Wolf of Mibu until the very end.

Hijikata: But my–no, the Shinsengumi's–makoto will never fall. No matter what battlefield we find ourselves on, no matter what kind of hell it's in.

Hijikata: ...Fine. Dead or alive, I'll show them what it means to be a Berserker.

Hijikata: Should a voice ever call out to me in a summoning, I'll charge in and roar with all my might!

Mash: You went through a lot this time around, Senpai.

Fujimaru 1: Yeah. That was even worse than last time.

Mash: Anyway, let's take a break until our next assignment. Why don't I make you some tea since we have a bit of time?

Fujimaru 1: Nice. Let's have that food we got from Kyoto too.

Mash: Wh-what is this...!?

Chacha: Oh hey! Why, if it isn't Fujimaru!

Chacha: Plain and boring rooms are not Chacha's style, so I tried reproducing that golden tea room from the other day. Chacha did good, huh?

Nobunaga: Well...this is no good. Needs more wabi-sabi.

Mash: No, that's not what I mean...! First of all, why is everyone messing around in Master's room!?

Okita: Well you see, I used up all my NP during our last battle...

Okita: I can't go anywhere for a while, so please let me recuperate in Master's room.

Okita: Oh, if you're going to be making tea, go light, please. And some sweets would be nice.

Chacha: Chacha too! Chacha too! U-um, cups, cups, cups...

Chacha: Well, I guess this thing I stole from the Demon God Pillar right before we left might work...

Fujimaru 1: Eh? Isn't that a Grail?

Fujimaru 2: Good work...!

Chacha: What? You can have it if you want it.

Chacha: That cup is not Chacha's style anyway.

Chacha: So! Fujimaru! Now that Chacha's at this Chaldea place, you'll never be bored!

Chacha: Now you have luxurious barbecued meals with Chacha every day to look forward to!

Chacha: You're already looking forward to it, right? Right!?

Chacha: ...Sooo! Mash, or whoever you're supposedta be! Chacha is already bored! Entertain Chacha! Do something fun!

Chacha: Vee-are? I hear there's something called Vee-are?

Mash: Senpai! Please say something!

Fujimaru 1:

Nobunaga: Well, it can't be helped!