Loop 46
True Beginning Heaven's Feel Backnight 7
There is a hole in my chest.
Something warm is spilling out of the wound, and something cold invades me in its place.
A dreadful yet calming feeling.
―――This is death.
I feel a little pain, a little comfort, and a dark sense of peace.
The fifth Heaven's Feel began eight days ago.
I arrived in the city of Fuyuki and began preparing for the battle.
After learning the topography of the location, I decided on the hiding place that would become my base.
With everything perfectly prepared, I summoned a Servant.
Unlike all the work I have done until now, this process made my heart swing.
It was not the joy in anticipation of fighting.
Two things happened that made me happy for the first time about my duties.
You told me to cross the ocean.
You said to travel around the wide world.
Uncertain of myself, I asked in trepidation if he was in any way dissatisfied with having to form a contract with me.
To which the servant I summoned replied,
“Back in the past, I have once fought alongside a female warrior.
I can see a shadow of that woman within you.”
His warm laughter seemed to ridicule the absurdity of my unease.
It's not that I was betrayed.
It's just that they had hearts of cold steel from the very beginning.
The "self" that every person is supposed to possess by the time they reach adulthood. The self that I never obtained below the exterior.
I never had anything to believe in.
Focusing entirely on forging the armor of my "autonomous self," I never trained my living part.
My inner self weak and cowardly, I have been disappointed by the world ever since the moment I was born.
"You spend your days as if it was work," father used to say.
That's because I had given up.
I, who was unable to hope, withstood everyday with no hope.
But that's because I was scared of everything.
In truth, I wanted to be rewarded more than anyone else, and yet I continued deceiving myself, pretending to be wise.
In truth, I wanted to enjoy those days like an ordinary person would, and yet I continued on, averting my eyes and telling myself I will lose it all one day.
In truth―――in truth.
Wanting to bring ease myself, / To subjugate this weakness,
keeping this miserable feeling, / I keep the miserable feelings,
I give up, / and give up,
and live on. / on living.
...If I were to confess...
It wasn't that I wanted to die.
―――And then, I fall down to this place.
The hell I kept on tasting again and again.
The bottom of the pot, made just from the resentment and hatred of the dead for all living beings.
Being here is painful.
It cannot possibly be compared with the previous sense of peace.
Having suffered through death already, ending up here afterwards is plenty enough for anyone to lose their mind.
It lasts for but a few minutes before revival, yet this feeling still makes me nauseous every time.
The first time I experienced it, I called it "hell."
"―――I do not know whether that place is what people call 'hell.'
What I do know is that it was hideously repulsive. To a conscious human being, it is the bottom of the filthiest gutter―――"
...No, that's not right.
This is not hell. This is not the place the dead fall down to.
My hell, my revival was the peace I felt a while ago.
That's why this is―――I've realized it long ago, his―――
"――――――Yeah, that's right.
Can't help that. I don't feel a thing, though. It's like, when I realize it, I'm here―――"
It is where he came from.
The way Angra Mainyu was before taking on its shell.
It is the place where he remained before forming a contract with me.
And that's where he will return once our contract ends, the false world.
Yet there is no pain in it for him.
A place that is nothing but suffering to a human like me does not bother him in the slightest.
What is a single memory for me is ordinary life for him.
Prison. Plunder. Abuse. Contempt. Eternity―――Void.
And at the end of the suffering, having affirmed the ugly side of humanity, a selfless trance.
No happiness, no sadness, not to mention suffering, nothing exists here. It is the Pure Land.
This was the life of a certain youth, said to be the epitome of evil.
But all that blank space is already starting to get filled.
Once the painting is finished, he will simply return to that place.
No matter how artificial it may be, this Heaven's Feel is his dream world.
...There's nothing like that anymore, though. No matter how much you believe in it.
So why is he trying to have this wish end, I wonder―――
“――――――”
I wake up from my slumber.
It was the most vivid "death" I had until now, yet I also feel calmer than ever before.
No, I must be only starting to thaw.
Reason and emotion, both of them are still frozen. The way I am now, I can handle anything, no doubt.
“Yo, up already, Master? Glad to see ya nice and calm.”
Same as always, I can see Avenger's figure in the corner of the room, occupied with the puzzle.
“――――――”
...It's getting on my nerves.
He's supposed to be my familiar, yet he does nothing the way I want him to.
If you're originally a formless shadow, how about I lock you up in an insect cage?
“Oh, still full of vigor, are ya? 'Twas a real good hit, actually. Got done in by a ex-Servant, no less, but I feel ya still won't let it go.”
Wicked laughter.
“―――tch.”
Once frozen, a flame lights up again in my chilled mind.
What I can't let slide isn't his loose manners, it's this air of a villain that he assumes―――
“―――Angra Mainyu. Why?
This Heaven's Feel is not just my own desire. No, there is someone who has yearned for it far more than I ever did.
...I do not understand. Our wish is one and the same, so why are you trying to end it...!?”
I shouted with clenched fists.
More than having been betrayed, it's his feelings that I wanted to grasp.
And yet,
“I give up. No fun.”
He utters right away.
Up until now, I have done nothing short of a stellar job of hiding my own emotions.
“―――Avenger.”
“Hey, don't glare at me like that. Look, ya were quite happy with it, weren't you? Getting to enjoy the Heaven's Feel to your heart's content, even finding out most of the details, and all that.
But ya know what? Not a single thing here you actually need... Well, right. As a familiar, me blurting this out to you is kinda against the rules, but who cares now.
―――Let's tear up our contract, Master. Do that, and the story ends there.”
Knowing full well what it means, he holds out his hand.
I cannot do this.
Our paths may have diverged in more ways than one, and yet...
Once met, our hands shall not be shaken apart again.
“Avenger. You, can still see me?”
“――――――”
Avenger's body distorted for a brief moment.
...As I thought.
He has all but returned to the void already.
“...Heh. Just so you know, I have no intentions of stopping this Heaven's Feel. Much less going back to being a corpse.”
“I see. Well, if my Master says so, ain't got no choice but to keep the contract going... But, you know, I guess we'll have the real winner of the war break the Grail again, won't we.”
“Wha―――I-Is that really possible?”
“Oh sure it is. He's done it once already, in fact.
Didn't I tell ya, it's a reproduction of the fifth time. If the same guy gets his grubby little hands on the Holy Grail, ain't gonna be a surprise when he smashes it again.”
“――――――Right. That's...”
Avenger's last trump card.
No, it's the final act before the curtains fall, planned since the very beginning.
“Avenger.”
“Hm?”
I pin this black shadow to the wall.
“...I wish we had done this sooner.
You, my own Servant, have ignored me far too many times.”
I leave no room for a counterattack.
Using a Command Spell like this―――Isn't there a cage around to confine him in?―――Aah, in that case―――
“―――For the likes of you, become my left arm.”
“Ha―――haa, ha, ha―――”
...With this, he can no longer meet the winner of the Heaven's Feel on his own will... or anyone else, for that matter.
I don't want to die.
I don't want to kill him, either.
Therefore―――from here on, I will protect the Holy Grail.
“Ha―――haa, ha―――I will not cancel the contract.
...Angra. Once you say you wish to end this world, you are my enemy―――”
Come, let us continue the Heaven's Feel.
The Holy Grail is mine.
This wish is mine.
;
No one shall take them from me―――
Day 1
Emiya Residence・Start of Night Things to do
Night・Streets at night (patrol)
Night・2 Finale
No matter how often I come here, the church is always the same.
Saber never discovered anything, either.
There's nothing here.
Let's go elsewhere.
Though it would be good to have a definite objective the next time I'm here.
Day 2
Town・Special Ｗｉｓｈ．
That's right, I made a promise with Saber. Today's a day off, I couldn't ask for better timing.
“Saber's shoes... good, they're here.”
I'll strike while the iron is hot. First off, I have to contact Fuji-Nee at school, then...
The two of us will leave this house behind for a while.
Surprisingly, the plans were made quite smoothly.
All it took was a phone call to the school archery club, and I broached the subject of a school tour with Fuji-Nee...
《Oh, you're coming today? Go ahead, I already asked the vice principal for you. Oh, and bring me lunch, okay?》
And with that, I easily got an okay from her.
I spent an hour making lunch, but that only took until about 10 am.
It's just something that came to mind, and a tour would have been just as fine in the afternoon...
“No, if we are going to go, let us go now!
Do not worry about my plans. Yes!”
Saber pressured me into it with unusual enthusiasm.
“But... isn't this a little sudden, Saber?”
“―――Hm? What of it, Shirou?”
“Well, I'm saying there's no need to rush. A tour of the school will only take half a day, so we could have spent a little more time getting ready...”
“No. This is sufficient.
Shirou, you are never relaxed when you go to school. So please go in the spirit of attending school normally, without taking the time to brace yourself.”
“Attending normally, huh...? Got it. We'll try that.”
“Yes. Now, let us make haste, Shirou. If we do not hurry, that thing you call "lunch break" will start without us.”
Saber urges me hurriedly.
...Hmm... Just what about this does Saber enjoy so much?
We take the usual path up the hill.
I steal a glance at Saber, and...
...she's making a face I can't quite read.
I try a few different things, but in the end we arrive at the school gate before I'm able to gauge Saber's intentions.
“Huh...?”
It might just be my imagination, but the school actually seems livelier than usual.
“Shirou, I thought today was supposed to be a holiday...”
“Yeah... that's weird. Even though club activities are still going, it shouldn't be this busy―――Ah.
I see, the cultural festival!”
Right, the cultural festival is coming up soon.
If there are any classes doing major events, it wouldn't be strange at all to see a lot of people here.
“Cultural festival...? Is that some kind of fair held on school grounds?”
“Yep. Once a year, we have a festival run exclusively by students. It looks like some of them are here making preparations.
But there's no need to worry about them. It's still only about thirty people.”
“..................”
Saber falls silent.
Until now she'd had such a bold attitude, but that composure is suddenly gone.
“? Did you want to see the school without anyone here?”
“No, that isn't it... it is just that if other students are here, I am sure it will be trouble for you, Shirou.
...That is, if I had known it would be like this, I would have borrowed a school uniform from Rin.”
“―――Wait, what?”
The prospect shocks me beyond words.
Saber would wear... a Homurabara uniform?
W-What is this unprecedented image in my head?
Tohsaka's uniform would probably be too big on Saber, no above that, would it look good on her? No-no-no, I mean, in other words, we'd be like classmates, and...
“Let's go home, Saber. Right away. It's okay, even if Tohsaka's is out there's always Sakura's.”
“But if you think about it, I would still be treated as a visitor.
If I wore a Homurabara uniform, would not that be complicated to explain?”
“Uh.”
She sees through it in only three seconds.
With the same calm she displays in battle, Saber arrives at the logical conclusion.
“My apologies, Shirou.
Despite asking you to proceed as you normally would, I am fussing over needless things myself.
Shirou, is something the matter? You look terribly depressed.”
“...No, it's nothing.
You're right, Saber. Like you said, your regular clothes are nothing to fuss about, so let us go inside.”
My delusion ends.
Dropping my shoulders with a great sigh, I turn towards the school building.
After seeing me enter, Saber also slips inside the gate.
For now, let's head to the archery club.
I'm prepared for the attention that Saber will receive, but I'd like to enjoy the day until lunch is... over...
“HOOOO-LYYYYY SHIT!!! Emiya, our Emiya from 3-C just brought a blonde foreigner to school!!!?”
Just as my plan goes into effect... back to the drawing board.
Of all people, that human soapbox Gotou just had to be stretching with the track and field club...!
“““SAY WHAAATT----!!??”””*
A sudden cry rises from the entire boys track club.
I guess Saber's radiance is visible even from far away.
A horde of male athletes, always hungry for cute girls, races over in a stampede and forms a circle around us to ogle Saber.
A pain in the ass now obstructs our path to the archery dojo.
“What a babe! Is she a model? Here for a photo shoot? Or maybe my waifu that I've never been told about!?”
“Hell naw! Maybe she's here for us. Maybe she wants to join the track club. It's okay even if you're not a student!”
“Hmmm, I'd be fine with you even if you weren't a girl!”
“A transfer student... wouldn't make sense, not now. Look, I bet she's some school official. You know, our English teacher sucks anyway. Maybe she's here as an English teaching assistant?”
“A little girl teacher...!? Ohhhh, gimme a hug!”
“Gah, don't even joke about that! D'you want me to repeat another year!?”
“........................”
Howling, slavering beasts.
Gutless ones, though.
Keeping twenty meters out, they've only surrounded and observed Saber from a distance so far.
“Shirou―――is that the cultural festival?”
“No. It's just an obstacle.”
Though you definitely shouldn't look down on them like animals.
They might appear to be a troublesome pack, but there's a very good reason they've become that way.
Because―――
“Huh? No way! Heyyy～, Yukicchi, Mekane!
Look over there, it's Saber-san, it's Saber-san! Whew, she's gorgeous as always, damn it!”
With a "Yahoo!", the rampaging train kicks the circle of boys aside and charges in.
...Like I said, because,
there sure is a lack of cute girls in the track and field club...!
“Yo! You've got a lot of free time as usual, Emiya!
So, watcha doing today? Here to show off that beauty to the morons here?”
Makidera Kaede.
The archetypal girls track club member is energetic as always.
“Ah, it really is Saber-san and Emiya-kun.
Hello, it's been a while. Good morning to you too, Emiya-kun.”
And this young lady is Saegusa Yukika.
As far as track club members go, she's an exceptional representative.
“Yo, morning.”
“Good morning, Yukika. You remembered me.”
“Yes. I'm happy that wasn't the only time we met.”
The frantic atmosphere quickly calms down.
And that's how our grand morning went.
“Gimme some love, here! What's up with you, giving Yukika all the attention but ignoring me!?”
“It has been a long time, Kaede. Since you are in uniform, your club activities must be over. It is a shame I did noy get to see your superb running.”
“Eh... Yeah, um, thanks.”
The moment Saber speaks to her, Makidera stops and suddenly becomes acutely aware of her surroundings.
I'm not sure what it means.
“Uh, hey Emiya, got a minute?”
“What now? We're in a hurry, so make it quick.”
“...Um, Saber-san is a foreigner, right? Neither of her parents are Japanese, right?”
“Hah?”
Raised eyebrows.
What is this girl saying all of a sudden?
“It's what it looks like. Saber's pure English.”
Ah... well, I don't actually know if she's pure-blooded or anything like that. Matters of race aside, Saber's got some other unbelievable issues.
“Argh, I knew it!
W-W-W-What'll I, what should I do, Emiya!? I can't speak any foreign languages～!”
“..................”
She clings to me in tears.
How should I put this, Makidera―――
“M-Maki-chan, Saber-san has always spoken Japanese. She just said, "it has been a long time."”
“W-What!? You mean Saber-san didn't say, "Bring me the most beautiful girl in your school, muahaha, so it's you, Kaede Makidera, time to die"*!?”
“...In a sense, if that were to come true, life would be so much easier.”
“Oh, Himuro, good timing. I'll leave them to you.”
“I got it. Sorry, Emiya.
...These little animals are just having their guard instincts flare up because they see someone unfamiliar on campus. They're harmless, so please ignore them.”
“HAY! Who you callin' a monkey!? ...Wait, you mean Yukicchi, right!?”
“By the way, what are the two of you doing here today?”
“Ah, well.”
Impressive.
She easily cuts straight to the heart of the issue.
“I came for a tour of the school. Shirou agreed to show me around.”
“?? Who's "Shirou"? ...Wait, you mean Yukicchi, right!?”
“Wow! Then, Saber-san, could you be planning to transfer here?”
...She really is impressive.
There isn't a hint of spite in Saegusa's voice. She is obviously thoroughly used to Makidera's performances already.
“NO. WAY.
C'mon, say something! I'm lonely! I'm fine with being called a monkey, just look at me!”
“Ah. Maki-chan, Emiya-kun's first name is Shirou-kun. You're in a different class so you probably didn't know.”
“sniff... You're so nice, Yukicchi...
But no thanks, there's no way I'd remember Emiya's name!”
“...Sorry again. Makidera's just the kind of coward who can't help but act like a jerk.”
“What'd you say!? Whose side are you on, Kane!?”
“The side that likes peace and quiet.
Now, Saber-san, is it true you have come to tour the school because you are transferring here?”
“No, that is not the case.
I just wanted to see what the school looked like.”
“T-That's right. Fuji-Nee... Fujimura-sensei said that cultural exchange is important.”
“Ms. Fujimura...? I see, indeed, she is the one teaching English. It wouldn't be unusual for her to arrive at that conclusion.”
“? So what are you trying to say, Kane?”
“To put it simply, I'm talking about cultural exchange.
She likely wished for Saber to observe the lifestyle that isn't normally visible, and likely to be very different from hers――”
“Hmmhmm.”
“And I'm not talking about anyone in particular, but perhaps she hoped that interacting with a person from abroad could help build confidence when dealing with foreign languages in general.”
“Hmm, not bad, Fujimura-sensei.
I just thought she was a cool, if violent, hooligan!”
...It takes one to know one, Makidera...
“I see. Taiga even thought that far ahead, as an educator.”
“......Well, she is a schoolteacher, after all.”
So she's carefree concerning most things in life, but wise when it comes down to the things that matter?
Well, our field trip did get approved quickly, with Fuji-Nee having taken care of it well in advance.
“By the way, Emiya. What's in that bag?”
“This is the lunch I promised Fujimura-sensei. For starters, we're going to deliver it to the archery range.”
“Then you'd better hurry... We'll drive off the crowd of boys gathering over there.”
“Yeah. They're just skipping practice and chit-chatting. That's why they'll never make it past qualifying.”
“Then, excuse us. Saber-san, please enjoy the rest of your day.”
“I will, Yukika. Do not go through too much trouble on my behalf.”
With a quick bow, Yukika hurries to help the two... no, rather, to stop Makidera from further abusing the boys track team.
The three of them balance each other out unbelievably well.
“Well, let's go deliver the lunch.”
“Yes. Let us head to the archery range first, Shirou.”
The dojo is quiet. I wonder if club activities are only scheduled from the afternoon today?
In the heart of the still-empty dojo, a tiger that just lay sprawled on the floor springs up to her feet.
“Shirou, you're laaate. I got so tired of waiting I thought I was going to turn into a rug.”
...You already have.
Just now, you most definitely have, Fuji-Nee.
“Sorry for the wait. But you're the one who ordered this much food. You would've had to wait one or two hours anyway.”
I put, or rather, pile up, the lunchboxes I've been carrying onto the ground.
There's enough food for about six people.
“Excellent, excellent. Fine work, Shirou.
Hmm, this much should be enough. There's lunch for me, Sakura-chan, Shirou and Saber-chan, and Mitsuzuri-san.”
“Taiga, may I take lunch here?”
“Of course! You've come all this way to see the school, so it would be a waste if we didn't do something special.”
“But I am not in the club――”
“Don't sweat the small stuff.
You're a visiting guest at this school, it doesn't matter if you're a club member or not. And besides, Saber-chan, you're Shirou's guardian, no, you're part of the family. If we had a Parents' Day here, I'd want you to come for sure.”
“I am Shirou's relative?
Well, that certainly seems to have become the case, but...”
“It's fine, it's fine. Rider-san's always here too, though I don't where she wandered off to just now.
Meaning, Saber-chan, you're here all by yourself, right? Sooo, you ought to do this once in a while too.”
“―――Taiga.
Thank you for your consideration.
Including that matter from earlier, today my respect for you has only grown. You truly are different when you're at school.”
“Yeah!”
From behind Saber, someone wholeheartedly agrees.
“Senpai, Saber-san, welcome.”
“Hey, good work. Sorry, but I heard you were treating us today?”
“Excuse us. The two of you must have club activities today.”
“Yes, today we start in the afternoon. Mitsuzuri-senpai and I were in a meeting for the cultural festival this morning.”
“Honestly, I can't believe we got so little done.
I'm ready to give up. They've received way too many applications for food events, and our club's members are strangely incompetent.”
“I'm sorry... I know the most useless one is me...”
“Ah, well, we'll manage. If it comes down to it, we can always make Minori dance... Wait, no. If we're going to put on a dance show, then don't we have a master right here?
Hey Saber-san, are you free on the day of the festival? If you don't have anything else planned, we could use your help.”
“Huh? M-My help?”
“Yep. As long as you're fine with it, would you mind lending a hand to our performance?
Saber-san, you're talented and you'll stand out on stage. Not to mention that you're overwhelmingly better than Fujimura-sensei with the sword. Actually, as far as I'm concerned, you're better than anyone else.”
“――――――”
At a loss for words, Saber remains silent.
“Hold on, Mitsuzuri. You're just going to embarrass Saber by being so sudden.
She isn't even in the archery club to begin with.”
“But she isn't unrelated either, right? Isn't that what Fujimura-sensei said earlier, that Saber-san's part of the Emiya family?
I don't see anything wrong with her participating in the cultural festival.”
"How about THAT," her face retorts with brimming confidence.
“Mrgh... well, yeah.”
“What now? Or are you against Saber-san coming to our cultural festival, Emiya?”
“Gah, like hell I would be!
I-If Saber comes wearing a Homurabara uniform, I'll have no regrets of these past three years!”
“See, it's settled then.
Hey Saber-san, just think about it a little. Fujimura-sensei and Emiya have already said this much.”
“Yes, I will treasure the opportunity.
If you will have me, it would be my pleasure.”
“――――――”
Saber's voice comes out as meek as a kitten's.
...What's with me? For just a moment, even though I'm not upset or anything, my chest grew tight.
“All right! Now that it's decided, let's have lunch!
C'mon Shirou, open up those lunchboxes! My stomach is growling, so hurry, hurry!”
“Ugh, way to ruin a tender moment.
All right, I got it. Sakura, help me out with the tea.”
“Okay.”
“It's fine, Emiya. I'll handle it.
I'm the one being treated, so let me do this much, at least.”
“I see. In that case... Sakura, I'll leave the lunchboxes and Fuji-Nee's guard duty to you... Don't look away even for a second.”
“Hey Shirou, what's that supposed to mean?”
“Yes, no early starts for you. Not even one piece!
Now then, Sensei, shall we unpack the lunches?”
“Sure! I wonder what's for today...”
After finishing lunch, we leave the archery range.
The stacks of lunchboxes were weighing down our tour earlier, so they stay behind.
I'll let Fuji-Nee take them home, while we continue touring the school.
“Thank you for the meal.
That lunch was very good as always, Shirou.”
“I'm glad you enjoyed it.
...Though to tell the truth, I wanted to eat on the roof. Well, how about the next time we get a chance?”
“Yes, by all means.
According to Rin, you often take your meals on the rooftop or in the student council room.”
We put the archery dojo behind us.
Next is... yeah, since she mentioned it, we might as well visit the student council room.
I see students scattered throughout the school building, so Issei might be there too.
We head towards the student council room.
By now I've gotten used to the high-pitched squeals whenever we pass students or classrooms in the hallways.
Have I just learned to tune it out, or am I not even noticing them?
Saber walks through the somewhat, considering it's a holiday, crowded halls with composure.
“...Huh?”
“Ah.”
Oh.
Unexpectedly, we come across Mr. Kuzuki.
Of course, we're at school so it's natural he would be here.
“Good morning.”
“Good morning... although it seems to have passed already. How is your health, Emiya?”
A strange tension fills the air.
Saber's expression is somewhat tense, as well.
“........................”
Kuzuki fixes Saber with a hard gaze.
He's no magus, but he's still Caster's Master.
He might take Saber's presence in the school as a sign of an upcoming battle.
“Kuzuki-sensei, Saber is...”
“I heard from Fujimura-sensei. Take your time showing her around until the school closes.”
“Ah, yes. Thank you.”
...I was the one who misunderstood.
This person isn't one to fight without reason.
“I should be the one thanking you. Please feel free to come by later.”
“I will, if there's time.”
With a "Good day," Kuzuki goes on his way.
He walks away silently, as always. What superbly balanced, flawless footwork...
“Hold on. Saber, what just happened?”
Why would Kuzuki be grateful to Saber!?
“...It's nothing important.
Occasionally, Caster asks me to help her with her side business.”
“B-Business...!? Caster has a job!?
W-W-What's up with that incredibly shady explanation!? T-There's no way someone like her could possibly be hurting for money, right!?”
After all, she's a one-of-a-kind magus.
Feats like turning lead into gold would be child's play for her.
“That is what I initially thought as well, but she said something about the type of labor that enriches the spirit being a different endeavor than that of material riches.
...Though honestly, where does she receive those orders from? There weren't any dresses of that sort even in my time.”
Saber grumbles about something.
...Anyway.
“...Well, that's another matter. But as long as she thinks it's worth doing...”
And it appears Saber did not mind it, either.
“Excuse us... as I thought, no one but Issei here.”
“Hello there, Emiya. I was wondering who that was.”
He looks up at me from some documents and a calculator.
“I see you've brought Saber-san as well.
I see, you must be the school visitor I'd been told about.”
"Hm," Issei nods.
Though he universally regards the female population with scorn, Issei seems to have taken an unusual liking to Saber.
According to him, he felt her divine presence, or something.
“I shall make some tea. Please feel free to help yourself, Saber-san.”
“Thank you. It is good to see you again, Issei.”
“Are we keeping you? If you're busy, we can come back.”
“I don't mind, these are all routine tasks. Nothing requiring urgent attention.”
Leaving Issei to serve the tea, I take a seat alongside Saber.
We can hear the clamor of club activities coming through the window.
“By the way, Emiya. Why did you decide to bring Saber-san here, of all the places you could be touring? I do not think there's anything special to see here.”
“That is not true.
I have heard all about you and the student council from Shirou, so I have been wondering what kind of place it was.”
“I see... Sorry, but if I had known the two of you were coming, I would have bought some fine tea cakes...”
“It's fine! Don't worry about it.
In fact, we just ate. I can't think of anything better to soothe our throats than some hot tea.”
“I see. That's good.
But where did you have lunch? Isn't the cafeteria closed?”
“The archery range. Shirou packed lunches for us.”
“What... Hm, I must have just missed you.
I visited the archery range during first period.”
“You missed out on Shirou's fine cooking, then.”
“Unfortunately. Albeit unavoidable, it's still a shame.”
“..................”
Saber and Issei complement each other frightfully well.
I only just realized this, but they might have really similar personalities.
“Well, then. Today the school is fairly crowded because many students are here preparing for the cultural festival, but I'm sure they will welcome you quite warmly, Saber-san.
It's a rare opportunity, so please take your time exploring the school. Or rather, I think you'd like to go somewhere a little more interesting than the student council room.”
“Not at all.
If possible, I would like to rest here a bit longer.”
I nod in agreement.
There's still time, so I'd like to take it easy for a bit longer.
“I see. Then shall we chat a little more?
I think that rather than a discussion about the campus, wouldn't you be more interested in hearing what Emiya is like at school?”
Saber lets out a curious gasp.
But personally, I can't stand being talked about like I'm some tasty morsel to be enjoyed over tea.
“H-Hold on, Issei. What are you planning to tell her!?”
“Nothing to be flustered over. That was my intention from the beginning. First of all, it's not like you've done anything to be ashamed of... have you, Emiya?”
“W-Well, no...”
“Oh my, Shirou. Are you hiding something from me?”
“I-I'm not. I've got nothing to keep secret from you.”
“Then it is decided.
Issei, please indulge me.”
“Uh...”
Ugh, they just went ahead without really asking me... These two get along way too well.
“All right. Even so, what should I talk about? There is so much to tell about him, that it's hard to decide.”
“What about the times Shirou has assisted you here, as I have heard?”
“That's right. To put it simply, he would help repair school equipment and so forth.
We don't have the luxury of buying replacements for everything that breaks, so he's been a great help in that regard.”
“............”
Oh man, this is embarrassing... it's like a parent-teacher conference...
I wouldn't mind it so much if it were Kiritsugu or Fuji-Nee, but for some reason, it's especially embarrassing to have Saber hear about me.
“I see. That certainly does seem to be Shirou's field of expertise.”
“That's not all, but we end up relying on him for every event, as well.
Or rather, now that I think of it, you could say that he's always helping somebody out.”
“Ah, I see. That does sound quite like Shirou.”
“Haahaaha. Yes, I was thinking the same thing. That's just how Emiya is.”
“It really is quite troublesome.
―――About that, Issei. Could you describe in detail what he does?”
“All kinds of matters. It would take me all day to list them, so I'll talk about the interesting ones.”
A couple of giddy honor students, these two.
...Whatever, just do as you please...
...It dragged on for a long, tortuous hour.
The two of them were talking really excitedly, but at this rate daylight will be gone. We still haven't seen a lot of the school, so I suggest we take a break for today.
“Sorry for keeping you.
Please, enjoy the rest of your sightseeing.”
“No apology needed. Tt was a very valuable talk. Now I know about another side of Shirou, in addition to the one that Taiga described.”
“Ha, ha, ha. Well, I shall be happy to entertain you again anytime you like.
If you wouldn't mind coming over to the temple next time, I'd be glad to have you. That way, I can offer you some proper hospitality.”
“By all means, if I get a chance.”
“...Issei. You still haven't told her enough?”
“Of course not. Out of the album of memories I've made over these three years, today was only a page of it. Next time, I'll tell her about your second year...”
“―――Let's go, Saber.
I had no idea Issei could be this talkative. If we stay, he'll keep us here all night.”
“I-I suppose so.
Then, until next time, Issei.”
“Yes, our second year... we were getting ready for the main event, our summer training camp, and... huh, they're gone!?
...Well, yeah... Did I get carried away and make a shameful display of myself...!?”
We spent the afternoon leisurely.
We visited all the special classrooms like the music and A/V rooms, then the gym and library, and then the student cafeteria.
Showing Saber around, who had never seen a school before, turned out to be more fun than I expected. I think it was well worth it.
We continued into the evening.
The students had begun heading home, and we started thinking of doing the same.
“Last of all, I want to see your classroom, Shirou.”
For the first time today, Saber asks to go somewhere on her own.
“So this is your classroom?
......It really doesn't look much different than any of the other rooms.”
“Well, of course. I told you all the classrooms look the same. The only differences between the classes would be what's on their bulletin boards, and stuff like marks on the desks.”
“Ah, hm, I see.
Then, Shirou's desk would be... this one, right?”
Using some kind of intuition, Saber points out my exact seat.
“Hrm! In the middle of this well-kept desk, I spy a grievous scar... It is as if it was dealt a horrific blow by an iron hammer.
Shirou, what in the world could have...”
“That was the time Fuji-Nee faceplanted on my desk and left a crater with her head. She kept teaching the class while blood gushed out all over the place.”
In my three years here, that was the first Legend of Fujimura.
“I... see.
It is a mark quite unlike yourself, and I thought it unseemly...
...but if Taiga was responsible for it, then I should say it fits you well, Shirou.”
With that oddly cheerful comment, Saber walks around the classroom.
Even though there shouldn't have been anything worth seeing here, she seems to be happier here than she's been all day.
Well, since we've come all this way,
“Hey, Saber?
Sorry to ask this all of a sudden, but why are you so interested in my school?”
The question's been nagging at me since morning.
“For no particular reason.
I was merely interested in the life you lead at school, Shirou.
It is thanks to you and Taiga that I was able to experience it firsthand.”
“――――――”
I get it. But still, I haven't fulfilled even half of that wish.
It's the school life that Saber said she was interested in.
Not the buildings, but the everyday life that people spend in it.
“I guess we should've come during a weekday. You wanted to see the classes, right?”
“I suppose so. I would've liked to watch at my own leisure.
Unfortunately, I can't assume a spirit form.”
“What's wrong with that?
Why don't you just transfer in? I'm sure Tohsaka can take care of the paperwork.”
"I see," nods Saber.
“That would be splendid. I had not thought of that.”
“Right? Okay, let's check with Tohsaka after we get home.
Knowing her, she'll probably scramble to have it all set up before we know it. Fuji-Nee will surely help out with that too.”
I babble on like an idiot, as if in a fever dream.
“Yes. I very much look forward to it, Shirou.”
Saber answers with a lovely smile.
...Though I'm wondering just what she's thinking behind that smile.
I still don't know the difference between a promise and a wish.
And like that, our brief rest came to an end.
Just as it was this morning, our walk home is nice and leisurely.
The view overlooking the town from the hill road is different than usual.
No, I should say that the view is always different.
I normally just don't take the time to pay attention to it.
Stopping for a moment, Saber turns her soft gaze towards the town.
“Do you see something, Saber?”
I ask her as casually as I can.
I call out to her in my usual voice, so as not to spoil the fun we had today.
“No, nothing in particular.
This is the town of Fuyuki, as we have always known it.”
A gentle breeze wafts through the air.
Her golden hair sways in the wind.
Our pleasant day is about to end.
“Then let's go home. You said there wasn't anything particularly special, right?”
“Yes. Still, I would like to stay here and look a bit longer.
So that I will remember this view, as long as I live.”
“Oh, you're exaggerating. It's no big deal, you know? You can come out here and look again tomorrow.”
Not just tomorrow, but until eternity.
The Heaven's Feel will never end.
Even if I were to die and she were to disappear.
I'm sure this peaceful life would go on forever.
As long as the fighting never ends, and as long as no one wishes for an end to it,
that promise will never be reduced to a simple wish.
“―――But, you would never allow that. You wouldn't stand for it, after all.”
The sunset was beautiful.
...No, that's not it.
What's beautiful is that she...
“Isn't that right?
In this Utopia where people know no loss,
only you try to see the value in things that are no longer here.”
―――above all, that she feels the beauty of this sunset.
“――――――”
I finally understood.
This whole day, she didn't hide her face even once.
She saw that promise off with a smile. The promise that she could fulfill, if she only wished for it.
“―――That's right. I'm going to settle the Heaven's Feel once and for all.”
Such self-righteousness.
There's really no need to end the war.
I could just sleep until the fourth day.
I could just close my eyes and let the four days pass me by.
Just like that, all this strangeness would end.
But, that's not something Emiya Shirou can abide.
He can't let go of things that are lost.
He won't surrender to ignorant bliss, a life without progress.
He won't accept the most convenient happiness.
He's not one to take whatever is thrown at him, this self-declared hero that's twisted to the bone.
“Yes. You, and many others, would find that reprehensible.
But that's what I find noble instead.
You will end the Heaven's Feel. Whether I try to stop or save you, I'm sure the end result will not change.”
...That's why she didn't make any promises she couldn't keep.
Like watching a well-made tale unfold, she simply smiled and closed her eyes to tomorrow.
“...Is that really alright? My own thoughts are a lot closer to being stubborn and fanatical.”
“Yes, I shall continue to protect that pride.
Until the very end, I offer my life as your sword.”
Now, this one was a promise.
She swore an oath to fight alongside me.
Without a thought of regret, she continues cutting my dream spectacularly into ribbons.
“Please don't make such a sad face.
It will be all right. Even if the end comes, it won't be a farewell.”
“It won't?”
“No―――We shall each return to the future we desired.”
Well, of course.
Whatever that desired future is, we'll know when the dark night ends.
―――There's nothing to be afraid of.
The light of the brightest star of them all is guiding me forward.
“Let's go home, Saber.
Thanks for today.”
“Not at all. I should be the one thanking you, Shirou.”
We resume walking.
The curtain falls on another day.
Now―――when I wake up, I will have to keep living a life worthy of this sword myself―――
Day 3
Streets・Day 3 Bridge on an ordinary night - left
“Huh―――?”
In the middle of the bridge, something strange catches my eye.
Stopping in my tracks, I look at the figure. I think to myself, but can't really understand what their intentions are.
“......What are you trying to do?”
I'd be worried later if I ignored this.
As a friend, I should at least give a word of caution.
“What's this? I thought I mistook a spider crawling its way up here, but isn't it none other than Shirou-kun from the Emiya household?
What brings you to a place like this, something happen? The roads around here are dangerous, you know? Ah, could it be you're planning to jump off?”
“...............sigh”
Suddenly, I feel drained.
For her to seriously worry I'm going to jump off, I just don't get her thought process.
“You know, Tohsaka. I don't think that's the right reaction to someone worrying about the well being of a friend.
Also, you're the one who's doing something dangerous.”
“Eh? No way, you saw that earlier, Emiya-kun!?”
“Tch, I was seen...? The whole time...? So, I was completely found out, huh? Damn iiiit!”
“Huh?”
0.2 seconds after I tilted my head in confusion at Tohsaka's eccentricities...
A single punch, as if to counter-attack, made explosive contact with the side of my head.
“―――I'm sorry, it was a misunderstanding.”
"Sorry," she lowers her arms to her sides with a slight bow.
In addition to her study of Chinese martial arts, it seems like Tohsaka has taken up karate too.
“...No, that was incredible, Tohsaka. The way used your entire body as you threw it, that was one magnificent right hook. That may have even cracked my cheekbone.”
Fu～fu～fu.
I don't say it, but I tell her through the look in my eyes that her feelings alone aren't enough to earn my forgiveness.
“L-Like I already said, I'm sorry.
Everything just now was completely my fault. Everywhere, from top to bottom was my carelessness.”
It was unusual to hear such an earnest apology from Tohsaka.
Troubling people is like a hobby for this red devil, but the moment when one of her careless mistakes ends up making trouble for someone, she becomes unexpectedly meek.
...At times like these Tohsaka tends to do whatever she likes, but unfortunately, the place she chose is a two-lane roadway with a 60 km/h speed limit where even the slightest negligence can get you run over.
“...Well, try to slow down a bit next time. If your first reaction is to punch someone, I'm worried about your future.”
Not so much for her future as those of the innocent people in her near vicinity.
“H-How rude, I'm usually more calm.
If it was anyone else that saw me, I would've restrained myself.”
“What!? S-So in your mind I'm guilty by default!?”
“Eh? No, that's not it, I mean that, if it had been someone else I wouldn't have panicked, or felt so embarrassed... Ah, no, I mean, anybody in that situation would've been guilty in my eyes, yeah.”
“...I don't really see your point.
You're saying that only because it was me, that misunderstanding just now was a heavier offense?”
“T-That's right. Umm... R-Right! Because you've got really good eyes, Shirou.”
“............”
So that's it.
At this point, even I can understand what's going on.
After eating devastating punch, I explained that I had just gotten here and she entered self-loathing mode.
After that though, no matter how persistently she says, "Don't ask me why..."
“...I don't get it. Why did you climb up that steel frame? Are normal streets just too boring for you?”
Bullseye, huh?
Apparently before I arrived, Tohsaka had been elegantly observing the city below from on top of that steel arch.
“A-Aren't you unusually sharp today, Emiya-kun?
...As I thought, you were watching from the beginning...?”
“If I were watching from the beginning, I would have stopped you immediately.
Climbing up there is reckless, even for you. This isn't the circus. If you fall, you won't get away with just a few scrapes.
...Honestly, don't make me worry so much.”
"Idiot." I hit her head with a light chop.
“..................”
Tohsaka took my chop without complaint.
...Well, what can I say? It's a bit unusual, but a meek Tohsaka isn't bad either.
“I don't know what you were trying to do, but next time please just walk across like a normal person. If you do that then I'll call it even for that right hook just now.”
“...Fine. I can't make any promises, but I'll try my best not to do it again, unless it's do or die.
Well, I'm done investigating anyway.”
Saying "I can't make any promises" is just like her.
At the very least, it means there's a possibility of her climbing that arch once more.
“Say, Tohsaka. You weren't investigating the monsters I told you about, were you?”
“...! ...Wait, just what in the world is going on?
You're very observant, today of all days. Even though I was up on that steel frame, how did you connect that with the familiars?”
“Well, um, how do I put it? It's just that...”
...Damn.
I met someone here doing exactly the same thing as Tohsaka some time ago, but I'm not sure if I should tell her that.
“It's what?”
“It's just that Archer did something pretty similar right here.”
...I knew she'd react like this.
The relationship between Tohsaka and Archer isn't really something you can easily explain.
Even though their contract has been released, there's no sign from either that they've accepted that.
So like now, they show interest in the same things while acting independently from each other, calling it a relationship of "give and take."
“...Hmm. I was wondering why he never came by to greet me and there he is again, sticking his nose where it doesn't belong.
So, what did he say, Emiya-kun?”
“Let's see... Well, nothing specific. He said he thinks of them as enemies and other stuff like "if you defeat one more will come take it's place" and to "just leave them alone because they're harmless."”
“......Anything else? Did he show any sign that he knew something about the source of these monsters you spoke of?”
“I don't think so. It looked like he was still at the stage of trying to figure out what their goals are.”
“Excuse me? He's already investigated here and couldn't figure out something so simple? These things could have only one goal!”
“―――Wait. I'm the one who's surprised.
Tohsaka, you know what those monsters are after?”
“Yeah. I don't know why they're doing it, but their objective is obvious, isn't it?
Emiya-kun. From what you told me, those monsters are only killing you, right?”
“Ah――――well,that's true, but...”
“In that case it's simple. They only appear on the fourth night and only go after Emiya-kun, who feels there's something off about the last four days.
They're gathering to stop you from clearing it.”
...For some reason, I felt a shiver go down my spine.
Just as she says, those monsters have only been killing me. This shouldn't be surprising at all.
But―――"to stop you from clearing it"―――Something about the way she said that was nauseatingly repulsive.
“Then again, I'm starting to wonder what the point of this is. I want to see these monsters, but no matter how much I search, I can't find them.
...That damn Archer, how did he find them...?”
Archer had taken up position on the roof of the Shinto Center building and sniped at the monsters trying to invade.
The great field of vision from that building's roof and Archer's hawk eyes. Without those two things, the discovery would have been difficult.
“...So, did he say anything else?
Something like, "Oh, I can't do this alone" or, "I could really use some help right about now."”
“No, nothing like that.
Ah, he didn't say anything, but he did glare at Ryuudou Temple.”
“Ryuudou Temple...? ...I see, the familiars are flowing out from that direction.”
I remembered Issei's ghost story.
The Kageyama Entrail Graveyard. The mountain used to abandon old women to die where not even the dead are buried. What is left is a mountain of discarded meat.
Truly, it is a suitable graveyard for these creatures.
“Okay, I think I understand the general situation now. It's a shame I couldn't find those monsters, well, I'm sure they'll show up in the end.”
Tohsaka stretches lazily, as if to say there's no point in investigating here any more.
“I'm going home, but what about you Emiya-kun? Shall we head back together?”
“Hmm... No, I've still got things to do in town. Let's part here.”
“Oh? Well, see you then. Don't wander around too late.”
Tohsaka heads to the footbridge.
Jumping over there is no problem with her athletic prowess, but... she really ought to pick clothes better suited for these kinds of stunts.
Well, leaving that aside...
“Hey～! Is it really okay to leave Archer alone like that～?”
“Why not? Whatever he's doing, it's got nothing to do with me. You really shouldn't expect anything from him either, Emiya-kun. When it comes down to it, he's all talk and no action.”
“Hm... Then, can I count on you instead, Tohsaka～?”
“Of course. You have to finish what you start, after all.
If you make it to the end, I'll help you out however I can. As repayment for that right hook.”
Without hesitation, Tohsaka jumps over to the footbridge and lands with a soft thump.
This is different than the time with Archer.
Leaving behind a feeling of refreshment, the red magician gracefully exits the stage.
Emiya Residence・Start of Night Things to do
Night・Streets at night (battle)
Night・2 (FinaleII)
No matter how often I come here, the church is always the same.
Saber never discovered anything, either.
There's nothing here.
Let's go elsewhere.
Though it would be good to have a definite objective the next time I'm here.
Day 4
Demonic Nest Arriving at the Castle
Demonic Nest Just before the finale
Demonic Nest
―――This will be the last piece above the ground.
Avenger said to "go to the Heaven's Cup."
Einzbern's secret artifact, the Third Sorcery, or the Heaven's Feel.
The girl of winter, who bears their name, ought to have known all the tricks behind it from the start.
Passing through the long hallway, I exit into the courtyard.
The sky above the castle is always cloudy.
No matter what kind of grail it is, perhaps it simply couldn't invade this castle, owned by the true holy grail.
“Illyasviel.”
I call out to her.
Out of unease and resignation, I'm lacking emotion now.
“..................”
There is no reply.
I lift up my foot to walk a little closer.
“It's okay, I can hear you, so stay there.
Good day, Shirou. You came all the way out here to meet me?”
“――――――”
My foot stops.
Seems like this will end pretty quickly.
“Yeah, I have some minor business to take care of. There's something I'd like to hear from you.”
“How rare for you to call me out.
Well then, what is it that you would like to talk about? If possible, I would prefer something light.
It's a party, after all. Wouldn't it be such a waste not to have fun?”
“I can agree with that much.
So, like I thought, you did know everything, didn't you?”
“Kind of. But you'd probably stop me if you knew. That's why, as much as possible, I wanted to prevent you from coming here.
If things could continue the way they are, then I would never want them to end, either.”
...Ah.
So that's why I didn't want to do anything in this castle.
That interference was Illya's form of resistance.
“...Well, all things considered, it kind of feels like you went too far with your hobbies.”
“Heheh. That's 'cause you showed up in the end, anyway. So I decided, in that case, we should put everything in order and have fun.”
Everything's in order, huh?
Even though she had known it all from the beginning, this girl still played along.
She waited in this castle, without bringing down or blaming the real culprit.
“Illya. What is the Heaven's Cup? It's the Holy Grail that brought back the Heaven's Feel, right?”
“Well, aren't you impatient. You're asking the big question already?
But I guess it's been bothering you for a while now. I'll overlook your bad manners.”
“You see, the Grail that was the prize in Fuyuki's Heaven's Feel was nothing more than a swirl of magical energy taking the name "Holy Grail."
It just "grants" the owner's wishes in a broad sense with that excessive power.”
“But, this Grail is different.
It's not particularly powerful, but it tries to grant its owner's wishes as much as possible within the scope of its ability. It's puny, but it's a real Holy Grail.”
“Needless to say, it is actually a Servant!
It's someone who was summoned in the third Heaven's Feel, taken into the Grail, and grew into a "demon that grants people's wishes" through the power of the Grail!”
"Demon that grants people's wishes" is a misnomer.
To be precise, he grew into a "demon that people wished for."
“But I will not speak of the demon's name.
The Heaven's Cup might be something along the lines of that demon's contract.
That's where it all began, perhaps where the demon's precious contract partner is.”
“So that's where the Grail is? Where is it?”
“The highest point in this city. Someone who wasn't in the fifth Heaven's Feel fell to earth from there.
Everything's upside down. It's not Heaven's Feel, but Heaven's Fall.”
The highest point in this city.
That's not the central building, but rather...
“That's impossible. How am I supposed to get up there?”
“Eh? Ah, I see, normally you can't actually go there.
―――I guess it can't be helped.
Say, what do you think of this Heaven's Feel, Shirou?”
“Nothing.
This is all fake. The four days are just a lie.”
“Then what happens after the fourth day? Does everyone disappear?”
“Ah―――No, that's...”
It's not that everyone disappears.
Only the events of these four days disappear.
They're just illusions that took place in a fake world.
No memory nor trace remains.
“Yes, exactly.
You called it a fake world, but that's not really true. Even if the setting is fake, the people are all real.
Take Rin, for example. Even if her role has changed, Rin is Rin, no matter what.”
“Only one person in this world is a fake.
That person disguised himself as someone in this town, and restarted the Heaven's Feel in this world.
To continue the Heaven's Feel in accordance with the wish of the one who contracted him, he is experiencing the fifth war that he was not a part of.”
...Come to think of it.
So that's why the earth and the Heaven's Cup don't overlap.
Using the participants of the fifth war, she continues the fight using the script of the third.
But sometimes the faker screws up, and the third and fifth become connected.
The two wars aren't linked. Her war and ours were two different things from the beginning.
“After the fourth day everyone will return back to normal.
Everything goes back to how it should be.
It's as if those four days never happened.”
“But only that person disappears with the fourth day.
They can't go to the reality that awaits on the fifth day.
Just like their lost name, there is no memory of them in the world.”
That's right.
After all, they were never in this town from the very beginning.
“―――But still.
If he's a fake, then he must be based on someone real.
What happens to the real one?”
“He switches places with the fake. As though nothing had happened.”
Is that so?
So when the fake disappears and the impurity is removed, the real one remains.
“I see... But there's something I don't get.
This will sound sort of strange, but is the fake really a fake?
No matter how similar he is to the real one, as long as he's not real, everything he does...”
“No. He's fake, but he's certainly real.
He's not a duplicate or an identical copy.
He just becomes the real thing only during these four days.”
...I don't really understand.
It's not the theory I don't understand, but why this girl is smiling at me like this.
Just from that smile―――I,
“―――Is that so?
Then everything he did was natural.”
Having resigned myself until now, I sigh with relief.
“Yes. I said he was disguised, but he was a formless nothing to begin with.
Nothing can't turn into something, nor can it imitate anything.
So―――even if he takes shape using someone's body, he's still no more than nothing.”
“Even if he possesses... no, assimilates into someone, he has no influence over the host.
So, even though he's a fake.
His actions are unmistakably those of the real thing.”
It all makes sense now.
It may have been fake, but everything that happened there was real.
But, how do I put this...
“...It seems like he has his own will, though.”
“...That's not the "nothing's" will.
After being assimilated into a body with a will, he's just deluded into thinking it's his own.”
I understand now.
To put it figuratively, if he disguises himself as a kindhearted person, all he can do is think like one.
The Servant called Avenger isn't something split off from "all the evil in the world."
That personality is nothing more than a fabrication, created using the "person possessed by the nothing" as a sample.
“Then he...”
He wasn't even a fake in the first place.
He simply didn't exist.
“―――No. I'll give you credit.
You are you, Angra Mainyu. You may forget this right away, but I will remember it to the end.
I will remember that you tried to bring an end to this wish through your own will.”
Maybe this is karma.
A descendant of the ones who summoned me is releasing and helping me.
“Everything in this world will eventually come to an end.
No matter how finely made this miniature garden is, you will know everything in time.”
“The flaws are visible.
If you want it to continue, then you must not act.
Unless you repeat only the minimum number of scenes and leave unknown events untouched, it will subside.
The existence of an unknown future. That in itself was the power that made this world work.
But―――you two couldn't do that.”
“――――――”*
That's right.
The two of us couldn't do that.
The real one, who sought a better outcome due to his natural warped personality.
The fake one, who wanted to see new things just because he found it fun.
That is the main character in this miniature garden.
“Yeah――――――”*
“This is all I can do for you. You were nothing more than an observer until now, but now you've been recognized by a person.
The rest is simple. After all, even if you forget, I will remember.
You will reach that moon, as yourself.”
“――――――You have finally arrived here, at long last.”*
It's as Illyasviel says.
I don't have any means by which to get to the moon.
The only ones who can reach the Holy Grail are Avenger's real form, which was there from the beginning, and Bazett, who formed a contract with him.
I've finished what had to be done.
I'll have to part with Illya before my fever returns.
“Did you have fun?”
“Yeah. Thanks, Illya.”
Not for what she did now, but for enjoying herself for my sake, even as she knew everything.
“You're welcome.
It's a bargain sale of miracles, so I think it'd be a loss if I didn't do this much.”
There's no lie in her smiling face.
Rather than joy, a feeling of enlightenment overcomes me.
“Hey. Is it almost over?”
I avert my eyes from Illya.
“Yes. With this, I've lost yet another star.”
Suddenly, I'm wrapped in something warm.
And when I realize it's someone's body,
“You're so stubborn. You're allowed to cry at least once.”
At last my suppressed emotions take over me.
“―――Why? There isn't anything worth crying over.
Everyday life will continue. There's nothing lost.”
It's only a matter of something that didn't exist in the first place returning to its state of nonexistence.
A return to the cosmic order.
I leave the courtyard.
A brief moment,
“Ah―――, ack...”
I get just a little dizzy, and my memory of the events just moments ago becomes fuzzy and disordered.
“Thanks. Come visit again, Shirou.”
Rather than waving at me, Illya gives me a gentle "farewell" instead.
Still perplexed at my sudden memory loss, I wave her back.
...Even though the things we talked about turned fuzzy, our farewell stays vivid.
I mean, how could it not, when she saw me off with such a lovely smile on her face.
I'm sure those brief moments brought a bit of happiness to her, too―――
Emiya Residence・Start of Night Things to do
Emiya Residence・Start of Night Spider ladder
The curtains fall.
The buzzer signaling the end of the performance sounds, and the whole residence is sinking into a deep darkness.
Into a sleep so deep, none would revive and awaken before the fifth day.
“..................”
Without anyone to bid farewell to,
nor any baggage to carry home, we depart, leaving the many doorways behind us, as we always have.
The date will change soon.
On the night of the fourth day, the black moon is coming to do away with me, the only survivor.
That's the foundation I'm going to destroy.
“――――――”
I continue on, stifling the screams.
This is the tower that I will reach the hollow sky from.
Since I already know what my true identity is, the path should appear here―――
The date changes.
The atmosphere goes stagnant, time becomes vague, and even my body itself starts to undergo a strange transformation.
“,――――――”
My chest is hot.
I don't know if it's because of the fast breath, but this one heartbeat is no longer enough.
“,―――, ―――, ―――,”*
Leaving the screams behind, I continue.
...JusT as I thougHT. This is the bOTTOm of tHis worLd. From the pOint where it begIns extendS a BLACK THrEad.
...Within the slumbering town, red lamps flicker to light.
Mixed in with the fierce wind are,
the voices I am already accustomed to hearing, the voices of resentment that used to be a part of me.
“,―――!”
A sound causes me to glance downward.
...It's here.
A sea god rises from the mountain of wreckage.
Horrific feelings of resentment and envy.
Those are being emitted from what used to be a part of me.
“Ha―――, a, A―――!”
I run to the stairs.
I have to hurry. Before they catch me, I have to run, run faster, run faster―――
"WHat iS IT tHAt YoU thINK ruNnInG is gOInG tO ACComPLIsH??"*
―――RUnnIng... I, I neeD, to pUt aN eND, to tHis wIsH―――
...My vision began to fade.
It wasn't my vision that was fading, rather, it was the function of "sight" that was returning to its original nonexistence.
"THat'S RIgHt―――nO WAy i'D Let iT EnD LIkE thIs―――"*
That scream inside of me comes to plug up my ears as I crawl up the stairs.
sO fAR.
FaR enOUgH aWAy thAt I DOUbt i'lL EvER rEACh iT.
FaR EnOUgh aWaY tHAt I dOn'T eVEn hAve ThE wILl tO rEacH iT.
“―――A―――GI, HiE―――!”*
THeY wiLl cATch me sOoN.
COveriNg tHe toWeR, anD buRyiNG thE sTepS, a sWArm oF coRpSEs.
“GI―――GAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!”*
...graduALLy, i rEALIzE tHat A CHoRaL SonG hAS BEgun tO FiND ITs wAY FrOM mY LIPs.
ThE bLacK MOON REvoLvES.
aND A NeW mE aRRiVES.
aAAHh―――i'M sO eNViOUS.
i HaVE FAiLed. i HaVE FAiLed. i HaVE FAiLed.
IN tHAt caSe.
YoU, tOo, fAIl anD bEcoME a moNsTEr―――*