Billy the Kid
Seven Knights of the Wasteland
Billy: This is a hypothetical question.
Billy: Say you were asked to protect a town, even if your chances of surviving were...uh, low.
Billy: Tons of powerful, heavily armed enemies and you've got some scrounged up gear and just about no allies.
Billy: Would you fight, even without a reward? Or would you not?
Fujimaru 1: Fight.
Billy: Your bravery always impresses me.
Fujimaru 2: Protect.
Billy: Yeah, you always have the right answers.
Billy: After you.
Scoundrel: You bastard!
Scoundrel: Oww...ow! Damn...you...!
Billy: With a hand that slow, nobody would hire you as a gunman. Well, might as well do some honest work. Who knows, good things might happen!
Mash: Look how he moves. I never imagined the human body could move so quickly...
Da Vinci: The best quickdraw in the West, a move so great, it's almost legendary.
Da Vinci: I'd like to see that for myself someday.
Billy: Um...Master? Master, do you have a minute?
Fujimaru 1: What's wrong?
Billy: I just got some news at a saloon. Seems like this town's getting targeted.
Fujimaru 2: Sure!
Billy: Haha, my Master's sure upbeat!
Billy: Anyway. I hear that this town's getting targeted.
Mash: Targeted...by whom?
Billy: Bandits, scoundrels. Like that lot we encountered earlier. Spooked the sheriff and now he's useless.
Billy: And the townspeople are afraid to go out. I wanna help them. That's not a bad thing, right?
Fujimaru 1: I think that's great.
Billy: Oh, okay! Then let's do it!
Fujimaru 2: Unforgiven!
Billy: I knew my Master'd be up for anything! I'm really starting to like you!
Mash: Senpai, I don't know if you should have accepted this task so lightly. You should at least have asked how many you're going up against...
Billy: Oh, I don't know either. Hold on. I'll go ask.
Mash: Protecting this town from scoundrels... (Gasp) This is a standard setup for a Western movie!
Mash: Oh my...what a very cowboy-ish setting, Master!
Fujimaru 1: Do you like that sorta thing?
Mash: Um, well, not exactly... But there were books about it in the library, and I got engrossed in the story...
Fujimaru 2: You seem to know a lot.
Mash: Yes, there were Westerns in the library, so I studied them as if they were classic stories.
Billy: Hey Master, Master! I asked around to see how many there are.
Mash: So how many are there?
Billy: About a thousand.
Mash: 1,000. I see. It's a typical Western setting– Ehhh!? A THOUSAND!?
Billy: Master, give me your binoculars. Okay, I see them... Hey, isn't that...!?
Da Vinci: Hmmm. It appears that your opponent has hired a bunch of leftover Celtic soldiers.
Mash: Impossible...that army should have disappeared when Queen Medb was defeated!
Da Vinci: They've been summoned to this time and place before, and the area is still very unstable in space time.
Da Vinci: With a bit of coincidence and sheer luck, they could very well be summoned again by employing the proper technique.
Da Vinci: That said, it would be impossible for an amateur with no knowledge of magecraft to just pull off a freak summoning out of nowhere. Which means...
Billy: The other side has a mage, too...or someone like that.
Da Vinci: Naturally. That's what worries me.
Billy: One thousand Celtic soldiers...that's quite the number.
Mash: Master! Take a look at this!
Fujimaru 1: This can't be...
Fujimaru 2: A Servant signature?
Mash: Yes! It appears that numerous Servants are getting summoned as countermeasures.
Da Vinci: I can't believe that many Heroic Spirits are willing to come. Maybe they're spoiling for a fight. Or they're just natural heroes down to their core.
Da Vinci: Well, doesn't matter. We'll take all the help we can get.
Da Vinci: We'll operate as if we're fixing a Singularity, Fujimaru. Explain to the Servants and ask them for help.
Billy: Haha, Master! This is really turning into a Western!
Fujimaru 1: Teamwork!
Billy: Roger that, Master! All right, let's do this!
Fujimaru 2: Gunfight at the corral!
Billy: Haha, okay, Master! You'll get front row seats to watch how I handle my guns!
D：???: Listen up...that town ahead has tons of people, food, and gold.
D：???: ...Take them all. Loot everything you can find.
Celtic Soldier: Yeah!!!
D：???: We are hungry wolves. We are beasts who only know how to fight and eat.
D：???: That's fine. If we don't do so, we can't lay our roots down on this continent.
D：???: Steal the leylines and make this grand continent our own. No gun or sword is a match for you.
D：???: Now, go!
D：???: Use this place as a base so our clan can prosper once again!
Celtic Soldier: Reporting! A hundred of our front line soldiers have been annihilated.
D：???: I see that our enemy is quite the adversary.
D：???: ...
D：???: What!?
Celtic Soldier: Our enemies also have Servants.
D：???: ...
D：???: Servants...why you...!
Narration: Let's wind the clock back a bit here.
Billy: And so, in order to protect this town from a thousand Celtic bandits, I need everyone's help!
B：???: Hahaha! So it's Thermopylae once again! That does get me fired up!
Leonidas: I, Leonidas I, shall offer my shield in protection of this town!
Leonidas: Any one Servant is a match for a thousand soldiers, and we have seven. There's nothing to fear!
C：???: No wonder Servants who are experts in defense got summoned.
Hektor: But do you think this old man will be useful in this modern world?
Hektor: Either way, I got it. Hektor of Troy... I ask that you don't overwork me.
D：???: Bandits are oppression. That means this town is being oppressed right now!
Spartacus: It is my duty to destroy all oppressors!
E：???: Understood, agreed, and ready to succeed! Defense may not be my forte, but leave surprising the enemy and sowing chaos in their ranks to me!
Mephistopheles: For I am Mephistopheles! I shall spread the joy of confusion to the enemies!
Mephistopheles: Ah, despair is so delicious!
F：???: Assignment accepted. I can see why we were called, as many enemies as there are.
Hundred Personas: Hmph. As long as you have Hassan of the Hundred Personas, I shall fill out our numbers to match theirs!
Hundred Personas: Admittedly, protecting a town is not the typical duty of an assassin, but it's not as if I have no experience in doing such a thing.
G：???: Well, summoning me makes sense, at least.
Diarmuid: I, Diarmuid Ua Duibhne, have apparently run amok in this land before.
Diarmuid: But that was as an enemy. I would like to wield my dual lances as an ally this time.
Diarmuid: ...Amazing. A handful of heroes facing off against a horde or enemies... This is what I've waited for!
Diarmuid: Master! What is your command!? I shall paint this entire battlefield red with blood!
Billy: Wow, I didn't think everyone would agree to join!
Fujimaru 1: That's good.
Billy: They may say otherwise, but they're all softies at heart. After all, there's nothing to gain from this.
Fujimaru 2: It's all thanks to Billy running around.
Billy: You think so? Heh. That's flattering if it's true.
Mash: Mash Kyrielight shall help you all by navigating for you!
Mash: I will immediately inform you all if there are any changes in the town.
Billy: All right. Let's start by evacuating everyone in the town.
Billy: We're going to take them to the cave inside a forest nearby. I've already spoken to the sheriff.
Hundred Personas: Then we shall be in charge of leading the way. We do have a Hassan persona who is good at organizing lines.
Diarmuid: ...It's true. Fighting on the front line is not the only way to do it. Miss Hassan has the role of establishing communication with everyone.
Diarmuid: It's not as exciting or glorious, but I will also accompany Miss Hassan. We need to avoid getting attacked from both sides.
Fujimaru 1: Thanks, you two!
Both: Roger that!
Billy: Think about it, Master. We now have seven reliable Servants.
Billy: Let's start with the enemy's front line!
--BATTLE--:
Leonidas: The enemies were spineless! How careless of them to put such weaklings on the front lines!
Leonidas: However, there are still more. We should rest up while we have the chance.
Hektor: Hey, good work.
Hektor: This is probably going to be a drawn-out battle, so Master, you should rest a bit.
Hektor: Those are proper Celtic soldiers out there. They're quite the adversary considering how many there are.
Hundred Personas: Master, I have my report for you: evacuation of the townspeople is not yet complete.
Hundred Personas: We've gotten about forty percent out. I'm impressed with how well Diarmuid has handled the women...
Hundred Personas: But there are still children and the elderly. It won't be easy evacuating them all.
Billy: Master! They're here! More incoming!
Diarmuid: The two of us will put the evacuations on hold for now and join you in battle.
Fujimaru 1: Thanks, Diarmuid!
Diarmuid: Leave it to me!
Fujimaru 2: Billy, are you ready!?
Billy: Of course! I'm done reloading my gun. Now, come at us, invaders!
Billy: This'll be like a shooting gallery!
--BATTLE--:
Hundred Personas: Next report. Good news: half of the town's population has been evacuated. However...
Hundred Personas: We have eagle-eyed enemies. Some of the Celts are trying to sneak ahead and ambush them.
Hundred Personas: Spartacus is intercepting their attacks and Mephistopheles is confusing the enemy to hold them back.
Hundred Personas: Still, it looks like the evacuees in the rear will come under attack.
Leonidas: Master. Leave this area to us! Please prioritize the evacuees!
Hektor: Get going, Master and Billy! This is the path that you two have chosen to take!
Billy: ...Okay! Master! Mount your horse! We're going together!
Fujimaru 1: Got it!
--ARROW--:
Mash: There's still so many townspeople left...!
Spartacus: OPPRESSOOOOOOOOORRRRRRSSS!!!
Billy: Crap, Spartacus is getting pinned down!
Celtic Soldier: Huh?
Mephistopheles: Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock. Ahhh, watching an explosion is always so exciting!
Mash: The townspeople are spooked by Mephistopheles, and they've slowed down even more...
Billy: Okay. Master, what should we do!?
Fujimaru 1: Rescue Spartacus!
Billy: Okay, Master. BANG! BANG! BANG!
Fujimaru 2: Fight alongside Mephistopheles!
Billy: Okay, Master. BANG! BANG! BANG!
--BATTLE--:
Billy: Master, give me the bandolier I handed you earlier!
Billy: Thanks! Okay! Let's keep going!
Mash: !
Mash: There are some Celtic soldiers trying to attack the evacuees! Please do something!
Billy: Why you...!
Billy: Crap...I misfired...!
Spartacus: Hahahaha! I shall be the anvil against which our oppressors are crushed!
Mash: Spartacus!
Spartacus: My love...is going to explode!
Celtic Soldier: Wha...!?
Spartacus: Oppression will not be suffered to continue... Now die...knowing that truth...!
Mash: Spartacus has disappeared while taking in the Celtic Soldiers around him...
Fujimaru 1: Damn...
Billy: I'm sorry. It was my mistake.
Mephistopheles: No. We were just unlucky. And you know, if you think that was as bad as things get...
Mephistopheles: ...then there's nowhere to go from here but up! Okay, here's another bomb!
Hundred Personas: We have about eighty percent of the civilians evacuated. Just a little bit more.
Diarmuid: Ungh...these are...!
Mash: Detecting two giant enemies right next to Diarmuid. A chimera and a Spriggan!
Mash: I didn't think those were still around...!
Billy: It just means that the Incineration of Humanity left that much of a mark here! Let's rescue everyone!
--BATTLE--:
Diarmuid: You saved us, my lord...!
Fujimaru 1: Don't worry about it!
Mash: Master! I'm still picking up the chimera!
Diarmuid: Please stand back!
Diarmuid: Ungh...nnnnnggggh!
Diarmuid: Twin spears!
Billy: Diarmuid!
Diarmuid: ...It seems this is the end for me. I leave the rest to you...
Fujimaru 1: ...Okay.
Diarmuid: I have regrets...but...this isn't...that bad...
Fujimaru 2: ...Good work.
Diarmuid: Hahahaha, I only did what is expected of a Servant. Thank you, Master.
Diarmuid: Though it was brief, I'm glad to have fought alongside you...
Billy: ...Let's go, Master!
Mash: There are no more giant enemy responses. Let's move forward!
--ARROW--:
Fujimaru 1: Mash, how are Hektor and the others doing!?
Mash: The Celts have broken through the barricade!
Mash: Leonidas is still holding them off, but he won't last much longer...!
Leonidas: All right! It seems this is the end for me!
Leonidas: Sir Hektor, this will be my final effort, so let us activate our Noble Phantasms together!
Hektor: Tch. I got the short end of the stick here. I'd rather trade places with you, Leonidas.
Leonidas: Hahahaha. Unfortunately, the rear guard in battle is what truly makes a fight shine. I cannot trade places with you now!
Hektor: ...It was an honor to have fought alongside you, Guardian of the Hot Gate.
Leonidas: And you, Sir Hektor of the Shining Helmet. It was a great honor...!
Hektor: Let's go...Durindana! Blow 'em away!
Mash: I've...lost Leonidas's signal... Hektor is still okay.
Hundred Personas: Everyone has been evacuated! We'll hold the enemy back so they don't chase after the civilians!
Mephistopheles: I shall string them along and toy with them! Ahhh, blowing them up will give me such a thrill!
Fujimaru 1: ...I'm counting on you, Hassan.
Hundred Personas: Why the sudden formality? It was always going to go like this. I was ready for this.
Hundred Personas: Now, there are only ten of us. Just don't make this a losing battle for us, Master!
Fujimaru 2: Thank you, Mephisto.
Mephistopheles: What are you talking about, my little Rabbit!? I simply wanted to explode my bombs. And you simply wanted to protect the town.
Mephistopheles: Isn't this a win-win situation?
Hundred Personas: Don't just stand there, Mephistopheles! To battle!
Mephistopheles: Okay! It's time for our final stand! Take care, you guys!
Billy: Okay, Master! Let's go. Let's leave this place to them!
Hundred Personas: So?
Mephistopheles: Oh? Whatever do you mean by “so”?
Hundred Personas: How many bombs do you have left? Aren't you running low?
Mephistopheles: Ah. Well, this may be a surprise, but I have a great many hidden pockets!
Mephistopheles: One...two...three... I have a total of five more.
Hundred Personas: And when you run out of those, our only option will be a suicide attack. An Assassin relying on a suicide attack... Ugh, how mortifying.
Hundred Personas: If this reached the ears of the First One, I'm sure to get a lecture more terrifying than death itself!
Mephistopheles: Ah, but our destiny is to gloriously bloom and scatter like flower petals. And that means we just need to go out with a BANG!
Mephistopheles: Let's go out in the flashiest way.
Hundred Personas: Unbelievable. I envy the jester his carelessness. Well, I suppose neither of us ever look back!
Billy: Hektor!
Hektor: Hey, Billy. I just set off the final trap.
Hektor: It's a simple oil barrel, but I bought enough time to chat. Are all the civilians evacuated?
Billy: A chase is inevitable, but don't worry about that for now.
Hektor: All right... This town is isolated and it stretches narrowly from north to south. Setting up a front line here to defend it wasn't an option.
Hektor: But now that the townspeople are gone, it's a different story. This old man is ready to go wild.
Hektor: You just need to hurry over and deal with the enemy's boss with Master.
Billy: Whoa, that's a big responsibility.
Hektor: No role is insignificant in this situation. So which is it? Are you going to do it, or not?
Fujimaru 1: Let's do it.
Hektor: Excellent, Master!
Fujimaru 2: What do you think, Billy?
Billy: Of course we'll do it! And Master seems to be on the same page!
Hektor: Yeah. That's the spirit.
Hektor: Got it. Now, go! I'll cover you!
Billy: Master, sit behind me! We're going to break through the enemy line!
Hektor: Now then...I don't have enough magical energy to shoot off Durindana...
Hektor: But as luck would have it, I'm skilled at throwing things! As long as I have a rock or two, you lot aren't long for this world!
Billy: Hang in there, Silver!
Fujimaru 1: Silver?
Billy: My horse's name! We're going to intercept the enemy here!
--BATTLE--:
Billy: Okay, we've broken through the enemy line completely! Run! Run!
Mash: I'm detecting enemies up ahead! Looks like they have a huge amount of magical energy, so please be careful!
Billy: I know! I feel it stinging! It feels like Pat Garrett's bloodlust!
Mash: Can a human possibly exude so much bloodlust!?
Billy: They can. Especially during the pioneering days!
Billy: ...Now tell us. Who the heck are you?
Billy: Ehh, doesn't really matter.
???: Why you...stupid Servants! I can't believe my ambitions have been halted by mere familiars...
???: My golden opportunity lay right after humanity was restored. I took over this land's leyline...and I will take my revenge against the Mage's Association...!
Mash: Based on what he's saying, I assume he's a mage who was expelled from the Mage's Association for political reasons.
Mage: With this vast land and the leyline spread throughout it...my clan will return to its former glory.
Mage: The United States just needs to disappear from the face of history. An insignificant mote of dust that knows nothing of magecraft.
Billy: America, huh? Well, I guess I call it my homeland.
Billy: But if you say it's not, I can't really argue that either.
Billy: This is not my land, and it's not yours either.
Billy: We're just transient caretakers of the land. Now, draw, mage!
Billy: Let's see who's faster.
Mage: Kill... I'll kill you! I will not let you get in the way of my golden revenge!
--BATTLE--:
Mage: Ungh!
Billy: This is the final shot, mage. I only have one bullet left.
Billy: And I take it that you only have one more magecraft use left before you need to rest up.
Billy: It'll be a duel. Ready?
Mage: ...Fine.
Billy: There'll be no signal. As soon as both of us are ready, we go.
Mage: Okay. Fine.
Mage: (Stupid.)
Mage: (I've already set up protective spells... That guy's bullets are low in Divinity. There's no chance they will–)
Mage: Eh?
Billy: Okay. I win.
Mage: Eh...wait...I haven't... No...what...I...wait...wait...wait...!
Mage: What? I'm...dead!? He penetrated my defense. How?
Mage: How? How? How?
Billy: Sorry 'bout that. I'm an outlaw. I'm a villainous kid who plays dirty and always has a trick up his sleeve.
Billy: Yep, yeah...
Billy: Well, I fired three shots almost simultaneously at the same target, so we can call that a single shot, right?
Fujimaru 1: You had me worried!
Billy: Oh, I didn't intend to scare you. Sorry 'bout that.
Fujimaru 2: I believed in you.
Billy: Uh...um...
Billy: Thanks, Master. What? Don't look over here.
Billy: I said don't look at me!
Hektor: Hey, is it over?
Billy: Thanks, Hektor.
Hektor: Don't sweat it. I was able to protect you this time. I'll always accept a role like this.
Hektor: ...Uh, well I take that back. Next time, summon me for easier battles.
Hundred Personas: Hmph. I never expected I would give an after-action report, even if I'm the only one left.
Hundred Personas: But it was a great contract, Master. You were true to your word, and it didn't end up being a losing battle.
Hundred Personas: Ah, and I have this: a parting gift from Mephistopheles.
Hundred Personas: That laughing man seemed to enjoy it till the very end.
Billy: A gift from Mephistopheles? Is that...
Billy: A bomb!?
Billy: Hyaaah!
Billy: ...Hm?
Fujimaru 1: It says “congratulations.”
Mash: It looks like they're just noisemakers.
Billy: That guy messed around until the very end. Man...
Mash: But if it wasn't for Mephistopheles, matters would have been much worse.
Billy: Right. He's definitely better to have as an ally than enemy.
Billy: Now then. Even after the heroes return, we have so much to do.
Billy: We need to bring all the civilians back, and I need to collect my reward from the sheriff. Otherwise this was all for nothing.
Billy: If someone asks us what happened to the house that got destroyed, we're gonna play dumb.
Billy: But first, let's go eat. I may not be hungry, but I still want to enjoy something delicious.
Billy: How about we have a few drinks at that saloon? Oh, but bear in mind that if you drink booze made in this time, it'll probably taste like horse piss.