Lanling Wang
Some Say There Was a Lack of Something Vital
Narration: 7:00 a.m.
Narration: The time when most Chaldean Servants begin going about their day.
Narration: While there are notable exceptions, such as the night owls and Servants who stay in their spirit forms...
Narration: ...our subject is apparently one of the many who start their day at 7:00 a.m.
Narration: Although Servants do not need to eat to survive, many of them choose to do so for the social and psychological benefits.
Prince of Lan Ling: Good morning, everyone.
Narration:
The subject takes a seat at the dining table.
Narration:
Of course, in his case, his “meal” consists of no more than a slice of bread and a glass of orange juice.
Narration:
After quickly finishing his “meal,” the subject strikes up a conversation with a nearby Servant.
Bartholomew: Well, what do you know? I'm a hidden eyes kind of guy too.
Prince of Lan Ling: I see.
Bartholomew: Guess this means the day's finally come for you to lower your bangs as well, huh?
Prince of Lan Ling: Hahaha. By the way, on a completely different subject...
Bartholomew: (Damn, he's a slippery one.)
Narration:
8:00 a.m.
Narration:
By this point, the more diligent Servants are already hard at work, whether that entails research, training, investigating, or any number of other fields.
Narration:
Our subject has chosen a simulator training regimen as though it were the most natural thing in the world.
Narration: His opponent...
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: I shall be your opponent today.
Prince of Lan Ling: You have my thanks, Lord Yagyu. Now then...have at you!
--BATTLE--:
Prince of Lan Ling: Okay, I think that's enough for today. Forgive me for cutting the proceedings short.
Prince of Lan Ling: I simply fear that if we go any further, I too may end up treating this like a genuine duel.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: ...I see.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: If I may, Prince of Lan Ling, your swordplay strikes me as similar to sword dancing.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: It retains all the grace and suppleness of dance...
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: ...without sacrificing the sword's weight or cutting edge.
Prince of Lan Ling: Haha, that's very kind of you, but my style is nothing to boast about. It's something I had to devise on my own.
Prince of Lan Ling: As a general, I was so busy studying politics and warfare that I only had time to learn the bare minimum of martial arts.
Prince of Lan Ling: All the techniques I use now were moves I developed on the battlefield. I turned out to be much more adept at dodging than defense, so that's what I tended to focus on.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: I see. So your sword dancing was forged in the heat of battle.
Prince of Lan Ling: Your swordplay, on the other hand, was breathtakingly refined, Lord Yagyu. I learned a great deal from this sparring session.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: My Otomeryu is not ordinarily meant to be seen by outside eyes...
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: But that was a concern for my living self. Now that I am a Servant–a shadow sworn to serve a new Master–it is no longer relevant.
Prince of Lan Ling: I see. Now that humanity itself is in crisis, we can't be choosy about how we fight back.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Be that as it may, I am afraid I cannot allow myself to copy your style.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: My son, Mitsuyoshi, would have no compunctions about claiming any technique he liked as his own, but no matter.
Prince of Lan Ling: Does that mean your son has a different style than you, Lord Yagyu?
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Oh yes, very different. His talent with the blade came to him naturally, and his technique can only be described as flawless.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Nonetheless, the world is a big place. There is surely someone somewhere strong enough to rend steel with their bare hands.
Prince of Lan Ling: Ah yes, like the ones descended from living, breathing gods.
Prince of Lan Ling: Good point. Then I suppose we will just have to train hard enough to keep up with them.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Indeed.
Prince of Lan Ling: Oh, it looks like the next group is here. I'd best be on my way then.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Very well. Until the next time.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Hmm. It seems he noticed my warrior's instincts getting the best of me. What a pity.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: Now then, you there.
Narration:
Urk.
Yagyu Tajima-no-kami: What have you been doing this whole time?
Narration:
After being called out by the nonsubject male, I decided to make a swift and quiet getaway.
--ARROW--:
Narration: 12:00 p.m. Lunchtime.
Narration: However, the subject heads to the underground library rather than the cafeteria.
Narration: Oh, just for the record...
Narration: I'd like you all to know that the library's name was recently changed to:
Narration: ...“The Great and Terrible Yet Beautiful Murasaki Shikibu Library” I've heard so much about!
Murasaki Shikibu: Oh, hello, Prince of Lan Ling. What sort of book are you looking for today?
Prince of Lan Ling: Good question...
Murasaki Shikibu: Well, we did just get in a few grimoires and valuable antique books thanks to a certain, um, anonymous donor...
Prince of Lan Ling: I see.
Prince of Lan Ling: (Despite getting new books, she seems rather preoccupied...)
Murasaki Shikibu: I'm afraid we have yet to receive the new shipment of military strategy books I've been expecting...
Prince of Lan Ling: Oh, I know. What about a book that Master would like?
Prince of Lan Ling: I could bring it with me the next time I visit [♂ him /♀️ her].
Murasaki Shikibu: Oh, what a lovely idea.
Murasaki Shikibu: Okay then, wait here, please.
Murasaki Shikibu: Um, let's see... I think it was above this shelf...
Prince of Lan Ling: Uh-oh.
Murasaki Shikibu: Aah!
Prince of Lan Ling: Forgive me. This was the only way I could think to help in the short time I had to act.
Murasaki Shikibu: O-o-oh gosh, I'm so terribly sorry!
Prince of Lan Ling: Not at all. The important thing is that you're okay.
Murasaki Shikibu: O-oh, yes, I'm fine. Besides, it's all my fault for not being more careful...
Prince of Lan Ling: Accidents happen to the best of us. Please, pay it no mind.
Prince of Lan Ling: So, is this the book you were looking for?
Murasaki Shikibu: Y-yes, that's it.
Prince of Lan Ling: Then I'll go ahead and check it out straight away. Thank you for your help.
Murasaki Shikibu: My pleasure.
Narration: ...And so our subject makes a graceful exit, apologizing for his intrusion in touching Murasaki Shikibu's body even as his gentle smile makes it clear he meant no harm.
Murasaki Shikibu: (Sigh)...
Murasaki Shikibu: That may well be the most beautiful man I've ever met, in multiple senses of the word.
Murasaki Shikibu: Even with the mask on, he had my heart pounding. I shudder to think of what may have happened had he not been wearing it.
Murasaki Shikibu: ...H-hang on. I think I might be able to use this feeling in a story! I'll go write it down in my idea notebook right now.
Narration: 4:00 p.m.
Narration: The subject strikes up a conversation with two passersby.
Paris: I see... So that's why you wear that mask.
Jason: Man, it's a good thing you weren't born in Greece.
Jason: Back there, good looks like that would either get you cursed or blessed, and there'd be hell to pay either way.
Prince of Lan Ling: I can understand the downside of being cursed... but wouldn't a blessing be a good thing?
Jason: Hardly. Sure, a blessing might mean you'd be living the good life for a while, but one wrong word and bam, the gods go divine retribution on your ass.
Jason: Hell, maybe they just decide to go retribution on you 'cause they think you're getting too full of yourself.
Jason: Either way, the only ending you'd get is a bad one!
Paris: Oh yeah, that sort of thing happened all the time!
Prince of Lan Ling: I see. It sounds like Greece had its fair share of troubles as well...
Jason: Then again, you wouldn't be the first to hide your face under a mask. Pency used to do the same thing.
Prince of Lan Ling: Pency?
Jason: You know, the Berserker who's always flying off the handle?
Jason: Real short? Abs that could grate cheese?
Paris: (Apollo's getting a bad feeling about this! Abort! Abort!)
Jason: What was her real name again? Oh, right!
Jason: Pencil-Lilia!
Penthesilea: You mangled my name on purpose! DIE!!!
Jason: Huh–WAAAH!
Penthesilea: (Huff, huff...)
Penthesilea: (Glare)
Prince of Lan Ling: For the record, I swear on my honor that I never said anything untoward about you.
Prince of Lan Ling: That said, I should have stopped Lord Jason before he shouted your mangled name. For that, I sincerely apologize.
Penthesilea: ...Very well. But I should mention that I have no desire for there to be any bad blood between us.
Penthesilea: Come with me to the simulator.
Prince of Lan Ling: Does that mean you wish to fight?
Penthesilea: I would have let you go if you were a Caster, but as you are a Saber, you should be capable of defending your honor yourself.
Penthesilea: Unless, of course, that sword of yours is just for show?
Prince of Lan Ling: ...I suppose you're right.
Prince of Lan Ling: Besides, I could learn a great deal by facing one of Greece's fiercest warriors in mortal combat.
Prince of Lan Ling: Very well then, let us do battle.
--BATTLE--:
Penthesilea: I have seen the truth of your words in the strength of your sword arm. Very well then, our battle is concluded!
Penthesilea: I accept you as a fellow warrior and now trust your word that you meant no disrespect!
Prince of Lan Ling: Thank you, Lady Penthesilea.
Penthesilea: By the way, that mask of yours...
Prince of Lan Ling: Yes?
Penthesilea: I assume you do not get moisture buildup on your face when you are fighting while wearing it? That must be nice.
Prince of Lan Ling: That's right, I don't. This mask only covers my eyes, so there's plenty of room for air to circulate.
Prince of Lan Ling: Of course, it also extends up past my face, so I have to be careful when going through doors and such.
Penthesilea: Hmm... I see.
Penthesilea: The climate may have been largely responsible for this, but I always found quite a lot of moisture built up in my mask when I wore it in battle.
Prince of Lan Ling: Was it the kind that covers your entire face?
Penthesilea: It was. I cannot tell you how terribly I felt the urge simply to scratch my nose on countless occasions.
Narration: And so Penthesilea and our subject continued their pleasant conversation about masks.
Narration:
When it was over, they both went merrily on their way, much to my relief.
Jason: I-I only mangled it on purpose a little bit...
Narration:
Jason, of course, remains clueless.
--ARROW--:
Narration: 6:00 p.m.
Prince of Lan Ling: ... ...
Narration:
The subject suddenly goes silent.
Prince of Lan Ling: I've been looking the other way since you didn't seem to mean any harm, but now that you've been following me around all day, I feel compelled to ask.
Prince of Lan Ling: What is it you want with me, Lord Blackbeard!?
Blackbeard: ... ...
Fujimaru 1: You wanna run that by me again?
Blackbeard: I just told you! What's the freaking deal with that pretty boy!?
Blackbeard: Prince of Lan Ling? More like Prince of OP Super Hotties!
Blackbeard: I mean, I know Chaldea's always had more than its fair share of hunks, but he just takes it too far!
Fou: Fou. Fooou...
Blackbeard: Take Bartholomew. He might act all dandy, but it doesn't take long to see he's a gross creepfest on the inside!
Blackbeard: So you just know that Lan Ling guy's got to be hiding something too!
Fujimaru 1: So you're jealous of him? Is that what this is about?
Blackbeard: Me? Jealous? Of him? Pfft. No way. Not in a million years.
Fou: Fou.
Blackbeard: I just figure nobody could actually be that perfect, so there must be something we're not seeing.
Fujimaru 1: I don't know. He seems pretty perfect to me.
Blackbeard: Well, I don't buy it. Guys like that always end up having some kind of weird fetish or something they don't wanna tell anyone else about, guaranteed.
Fujimaru 2: So what if there is?
Blackbeard: Well, if there's something we're not seeing, I wanna see it, dammit!
Blackbeard: Besides, it's just human nature to want to find fault with anyone who seems too good to be true!
Blackbeard: Which is why I'm not going to rest until I've uncovered the truth about him!
Blackbeard: Wooo, let's do this thing! Gimme a C! H! A! L! D! E! A! Gooo Chaldea!
Fujimaru 1: What was that all about...?
Blackbeard: And so, I have returned with my findings!
Blackbeard: Long story short:
Blackbeard: He's handsome on the inside too!!!
Blackbeard: (Sigh) What a letdown.
Prince of Lan Ling: Th-that's why you were following me around all day?
Fujimaru 1: I have to admit, you really were a perfect gentleman...
Prince of Lan Ling: Now don't you start too, Master!
Blackbeard: Right!? Just look at how carefully he placed his hands when he caught Murasaki!
Blackbeard: See how he did his best to avoid touching her skin even as he made sure to support her head?
Blackbeard: If I didn't know better, I'd have sworn I was watching a scene straight out of a visual romance novel (the kind that induces serious blushing).
Blackbeard: Incidentally, scenes like that are called “CGs” in some games, depending on the genre.
Blackbeard: The more you know, amirite!?
Fujimaru 1: I-it really is like poetry in motion...
Prince of Lan Ling: When did you even record that?
Blackbeard: Oh yes, I'm not too proud to admit that my inner badump circuit was running like crazy while this was going down.
Fujimaru 1: I didn't even know you had a...whatever that is.
Blackbeard: Oh sure. It's right between my heart and my stomach.
Blackbeard: Once it spins up, you get palpitations, flop sweat, fever, flushed skin, dizzy spells, weak knees, and hyperventilation, though not necessarily in that order.
Blackbeard: You know, now that I think about it, I really should look into getting that circuit removed!
Prince of Lan Ling: Um... Master? Could we please make that...man stop?
Fujimaru 1: Yeah, I guess we should. (That circuit sounds like seriously bad news)
Fujimaru 2: True, this has definitely gone on long enough.
Blackbeard: Oh yeah? Then let's take this outside! I know I might not look it, but I'm still an ultra badass pirate!
Prince of Lan Ling: (The fact that it's true only makes him that much more difficult to deal with...)
Blackbeard: Hehehe... What a lucky break for me, getting to fight on a ship.
Prince of Lan Ling: Are you sure you didn't touch the simulation's settings!?
Blackbeard: Heh heh heh.
Blackbeard: If you think that's all I've got in store for you, you're gravely mistaken.
Prince of Lan Ling: What?
Blackbeard: Let's just say that Blackbeard is never alone!
Fujimaru 1: You mean there's another one of you? Oh gods, please no.
Blackbeard: Thank you for your honesty, Master. It's much appreciated.
Blackbeard: We hope you'll continue to enjoy Blackbeard brand products for many years to come.
Fujimaru 2: You mean you've still got crew members!?
Blackbeard: Hehehe. You won't find the sad sack Blackbeard who used to lie on the ground weeping tears of loneliness here anymore.
Blackbeard: Er, not that he ever existed to begin with, of course.
Blackbeard: All right, tactician, come forth!
Chen Gong: Good day, everyone. I am Chen Gong, the tactician Lord Blackbeard just spoke of.
Chen Gong: I'm a busy man, of course, but as I was told this is a time-sensitive matter, I decided to leave my errant tasks for later and drop by.
Chen Gong: And by time-sensitive matter, well... I trust you know of what I speak?
Prince of Lan Ling: (Um, Master?)
Fujimaru 1: (I think I can already see where this is going...)
Fujimaru 2: (Just be ready to run for it at a moment's notice!)
Blackbeard: All right, let's do this thing! By the way, tactician, can I ask why you're standing directly behind me?
--BATTLE--:
Chen Gong: I know what you're thinking, so before you even ask: it was a necessary sacrifice.
Prince of Lan Ling: If you say so...
Blackbeard: Gaaah! I really thought I was done for!
Blackbeard: Who knew just activating Guts took so much energy...
Prince of Lan Ling: Easy there. Are you all right, Lord Blackbeard?
Blackbeard: ... ...
Fujimaru 1: THIS is the music they're playing now!?
Blackbeard: Oh man, I finally got that event CG I wanted after all...
Blackbeard: I can feel my badump circuit whirring around... Pretty soon, I'll be my own little Blackbeard Restoration Labyrinth...
Prince of Lan Ling: (No earthly idea what he's talking about)
Prince of Lan Ling: This has been a very tiring day...
Fujimaru 1: I bet!
Prince of Lan Ling: Lord Blackbeard seemed very dejected when he left...
Prince of Lan Ling: I do hope he'll be okay.
Fujimaru 2: It was kind of refreshing seeing you perturbed for once, though.
Prince of Lan Ling: You know, you can be kind of mean-spirited sometimes, Master.
Prince of Lan Ling: Still, I haven't had a day like this in a long time. For that, I owe Lord Blackbeard my thanks.
Prince of Lan Ling: Having your day turned upside down by someone you least expected may seem exhausting from the outside...
Prince of Lan Ling: ...but if nothing else, there's certainly never a dull moment.
Fujimaru 1: Welcome to my life.
Prince of Lan Ling: Oh, right! I guess you do experience that all the time, don't you?
Prince of Lan Ling: ... ...
Prince of Lan Ling: In that case, Master, would you like to swap war stories with me tonight?
Prince of Lan Ling: I suspect that both of us have plenty of tales of hardship we could tell.