Sakata Kintoki

Kintoki's Bear Extermination on Mt. Ashigara

Sakata Kintoki: Bored. I'm so bored I might just nod off to sleep. Still, not that bad a night.

Sakata Kintoki: City noise isn't bad, but the silence of the wilderness at night is something else altogether.

Sakata Kintoki: Specifically, it's like, uh, you know...healing or therapeutic or whatever you call it?

Sakata Kintoki: Well, whatever, who cares. Which do you prefer, Boss?

Sakata Kintoki: A woman of the night, or a woman of the wilderness? A showy woman, or a reserved and quiet young lady?


Fujimaru 1: City nights.

Sakata Kintoki: That's surprising. Guess I didn't read you right.

Sakata Kintoki: But you know, I also like the cities of your era.

Sakata Kintoki: If we're lucky enough to save the world, I'll take you to a good place. Not quite gold, but platinum.

Sakata Kintoki: It's a favorite I found in a previous materialization. Nice place. Both the booze and the food were pretty good.


Fujimaru 2: Nights in the wild.

Sakata Kintoki: As expected! I had a feeling you did, buddy! We really do see eye to eye on everything!

Sakata Kintoki: But, aren't you a city mouse? Your face says you clearly weren't raised in the mountains.

Sakata Kintoki: I grew up in the mountains. You can say the forest was my garden. I used to run around all the time.


Sakata Kintoki: Anyway... That sky ring is such a nuisance.

Sakata Kintoki: The stupid thing ruins the night scenery. Really uncool.

Mash: Yes. We still don't know what the sky ring is. It's an unexplained phenomenon.

Mash: Both the Doctor and Da Vinci have been attempting to analyze it, but–

Fou: Fou, fou...

Dr. Roman: We can't figure it out. Not at all. That guy said that it was a Noble Phantasm, but...

Fou: Fou, foou, fou...

Sakata Kintoki: I don't like it. Geez, the moon and stars are all you need in a night sky.

Sakata Kintoki: That thing's up there, lookin' like the stars, the moon, and even the sun's getting in its way.

Sakata Kintoki: I don't know who, but–

Sakata Kintoki: Well, this ain't the time for idle chatter. Seems we got more insensitive dudes.

Sakata Kintoki: They do say the moon goes good with a drink, but what? Even monsters want something with their booze?

Mash: Huh?


Fujimaru 1: Is there something out there?


Fujimaru 2: I don't sense anything


Mash: No magical energy readings detected. It's just a quiet forest.

Dr. Roman: I don't think anyone's sensed us either. I mean, I guess there're a few wild animals out there,

Dr. Roman: but I don't sense anything that would be a particular threat to–

???: GAAAAAAAAA–!!

Dr. Roman: Huh!? What!?

Mash: Roaring of an unidentified creature confirmed from the southwest! It's outside of the magical energy detection radius, but...

Mash: There's no doubt! It's the roaring of dragonkin!

Dr. Roman: I-I see. So that's why! The reason why you, the Heroic Spirit Sakata Kintoki, were out “strolling” tonight!

Sakata Kintoki: ...Tch. It's bigger than I thought. And this job's a bigger pain in the ass now.

Sakata Kintoki: The Second Singularity, was it? I felt something roaring away in this era.

Sakata Kintoki: Man, it's gotta be—bears.

Mash: Bears?

Sakata Kintoki: The only huge beasts that roar in the mountains are bears. These ones are particularly noisy!

Dr. Roman: I wouldn't call them bears! Well, I guess it does no harm to perceive them that way?

Dr. Roman: Dragonkin, the strongest Phantasmals. In a way, they're at the top of the ecosystem...

Sakata Kintoki: Leave it to me! Time for a bear-extermination party. Boss. I'll lead you there!

Mash: –Multiple magical energy readings approaching at high speed! Judging from the speed and energy, most likely wyverns!

Dr. Roman: Perhaps they chain manifested due to the presence of the dragonkin. Unfortunately for us, there're a lot of them!


Fujimaru 1: Drive the bears off!


Fujimaru 2: Drive the wyverns off!


Mash: Yes, Master! –Preparing for battle!

Sakata Kintoki: Remember to roll up your sleeves! It's not cool to get splattered with blood during battle!

--BATTLE--:

Sakata Kintoki: That was boring. I don't think I even worked off my last meal.

Mash: Ending battle. ...All Phantasmals eliminated.

Dr. Roman: I don't think that was one of his skills, but Sakata Kintoki was just tearing those Phantasmals apart.

Dr. Roman: Stories say he's a hero that took a bear down as a child, so it makes sense that he's this strong as an adult.

Dr. Roman: Sakata Kintoki, are you hiding any Anti-Phantasmal skills?

Fou: Fou, foou.

Sakata Kintoki: Huh?

Sakata Kintoki: What're you talking 'bout, Doctor? I'm the source of my own strength.

Sakata Kintoki: I'm a golden man, glittering like gold. You need a different reason?

Dr. Roman: Uh, no, not really...

Sakata Kintoki: All right, we're good then. Oh, and stop calling me by my full name.

Dr. Roman: Huh? Wh-Why is that?

Sakata Kintoki: U-Umm, just try to get it, would you? ...I mean, “Kintoki.” It's a pretty lame name.

Mash: –An enormous magical energy reading is approaching! It must have noticed us during the last battle.

Dr. Roman: I can see it from here too! No doubt about it, it's huge, a Fafnir-type dragonkin!

Mash: Judging from its speed, it seems to be flying. Get ready for an attack!

Sakata Kintoki: This is so fun! I bet a flying bear is even stronger than a brown bear!


Fujimaru 1: How strong were brown bears in the Heian era!?


Fujimaru 2: Flying bears? Scary!


Mash: Only a few seconds left until encounter. –Senpai, orders please!

???: GAAAAAAAAA–!!

Sakata Kintoki: Oh, how bold! I'm totally awake now. I'll send you on a tour of hell as thanks!

--BATTLE--:

Mash: ...Target defeated! Ending combat. Disappearance of the large dragonkin confirmed!

Sakata Kintoki: Master, that was a good workout before a late-night snack! Western brown bears aren't that bad!

Dr. Roman: To be so calm against a dragonkin is really something... He must really be the child of a thunder god.

Dr. Roman: Or, perhaps in this case I should say, child of a red dragon? He's obviously not a run-of-the-mill Heroic Spirit–

Sakata Kintoki: I'm just me. Ugh, it's really too bad though.

Mash: What is?

Sakata Kintoki: My class, you know. Why did they summon me as a Berserker?

Sakata Kintoki: If I materialized as a Rider, I coulda clashed midair with them on my “Golden Bear.”

Dr. Roman: Huh, what's that!? What's this Golden Bear?


Fujimaru 1: Maybe a car?


Fujimaru 2: Maybe a robot?


Sakata Kintoki: You're close, Boss. Oh, so close!

Sakata Kintoki: You see, the Golden Bear can transform itself between car form–

Sakata Kintoki: –and bear form.

Dr. Roman: Wh-What! I want to see that! I really do! Doesn't a transforming Noble Phantasm sound amazing!?

Fou: Fou, fou, foou!!

Sakata Kintoki: Oh, even the blue squirrel here gets it. If I had the Bear, even Nikola Tesla would beg me in tears...

Sakata Kintoki: “I want that too!” he'd say, and I'd make him get mad like a sorry little brat.

Mash: Even Fou is quite excited... Senpai–


Fujimaru 1: I wanna see it! I totally wanna see it!


Fujimaru 2: Transfoorm!


Mash: ...also seems very happy.

Sakata Kintoki: Well, I'm sure there'll be a chance to show you all someday. Anyway, let's hurry on home and have a drink!

Sakata Kintoki: A celebration for driving off the bears! Doctor, get your best booze ready for us!

Kintoki's Oni Slaying at Mt. Ooe

Mash: Um, a clean...up?

Sakata Kintoki: Yah. Just a little business I've gotta do. I need Boss to come along with me.

Sakata Kintoki: Won't take long. It'll be a breeze.


Fujimaru 1: I don't mind. Let's go!

Sakata Kintoki: Alright! That's my Boss! You get me!


Fujimaru 2: Okay, but where're we going, and what're we doing?

Mash: You're going to Rayshift instead of using the training simulator, correct? What for?

Sakata Kintoki: You'll see soon. Mash, come on, let's do a cool golden shift!


Sakata Kintoki: Here's the specific coordinates. Right here.

Mash: Oh, you wrote it down? All right then, let's—

Mash: !?

Mash: Th-this place... A short-term Rayshift may be possible if it's not for a Holy Grail investigation... But...

Da Vinci: But I've taken all possible measures to prepare for this. You're going to THAT era, after all.

Mash: Da Vinci! Oh, so you know already.

Da Vinci: Yup. Kintoki came to talk to me about it last night. He seemed to have really given this some thought, which is not at all like him.

Sakata Kintoki: I ain't thinkin' too much about it. I just got feverish for half a day mullin' over it, that's all!

Sakata Kintoki: Y'all hate long explanations, right? So I just cut to the chase. Got a problem with that!?

Mash: No. But if you can at least tell us your reasoning...


Fujimaru 1: Is this really serious...?


Fujimaru 2: Where exactly are we going?


Mash: ...Oh right, Senpai. We are Rayshifting to the B.C. era.

Sakata Kintoki: There ya have it! And I told ya it was for a cleanup job. Gotta take care of a family matter.

Sakata Kintoki: Yo, Fuuma! If you're there, come on out! The more Servants, the better!

Fuuma Kotarou: ...Impressive, Lord Kintoki. You've detected me...

Fuuma Kotarou: As an Assassin, I am quite ashamed of this. But even my skills are no match for the legendary Lord Kintoki.

Sakata Kintoki: (Uh... Well, I just took a shot in the dark in case he was there... Lucky I said something.)

Sakata Kintoki: Whatever. That's my golden luck, I tell ya! We've gained a great ally!

Sakata Kintoki: Countin' on ya, Fuuma! Yo, Mash. Gimme a big-ass golden shift, got it!?

Mash: Senpai...


Fujimaru 1: I don't mind. Let's go!


Fujimaru 2: Family to Kintoki is family to Chaldea!


Mash: Right, Senpai. Understood. Rayshifting to the B.C. era, before the end of the battle at the Demonic Front!

Da Vinci: Sorry Mash, I need your help on my end. Like I said before, I'll have to do all I can to prove Fujimaru's existence.

Mash: Y-yes. I, Mash Kyrielight, shall support you with all I have!

Mash: Senpai, please come back safe! And don't forget your scarf!

Fou: Fooou!

Mash: Oh, Fou!? I was wondering where you'd gotten to... What are you doing in the circle...? Ah!

Fou: Foufou fooou!


Fujimaru 1: Oh, hey, Fou.

Fou: Kyaaau!


Fujimaru 2: Don't jump in at the last minute from now on.

Fou: Fooou...


Fuuma Kotarou: We're on...a mountain? And it looks quite steep.

Fuuma Kotarou: Thankfully, there is a path. Whether climbing up a mountain or going down one, the presence of a path is of the utmost importance.


Fujimaru 1: This place looks familiar.


Fujimaru 2: This looks like the sacred mountain even the gods feared...


Mash: That's right, Senpai. You've been there before. That's Mt. Ebih, the sacred mountain tied to Ishtar's myth.

Mash: Last time we, um...fought against some aesthetically disastrous–I mean, very strong demonic statues there.

Sakata Kintoki: Well, looks like they ain't around. And if they are, we'll just haveta take care of 'em!

Fuuma Kotarou: Please proceed with caution, Lord Kintoki. Those particular statues' kicks were beyond powerful...

Fuuma Kotarou: They were more destructive than a low-tier Servant's Noble Phantasm. They were certainly dangerous.

Sakata Kintoki: Well, yeah. Either way, if they do show up, it's not like we'll be able to just tiptoe arou—

Sakata Kintoki: Hm? Wait a moment. Those statues over there... Are they the ones you fought?


Fujimaru 1: They weren't Spriggan types, no.


Fujimaru 2: They were more erm...unique.


Mash: ...She should be a goddess who governs beauty, so why were they so hideous?

Mash: Unless the sense of beauty in the Age of Gods was very different than what we're used to...

Fou: Fou, fooou.

Sakata Kintoki: Hm?

Sakata Kintoki: Are looks that important? Don't bother me much.

Fuuma Kotarou: Are you speaking only about how a demonic statue looks? Or...

Sakata Kintoki: Demonic statues, humans, tsuchigumo, it doesn't matter. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Sakata Kintoki: Regardless of outward appearance, there's good, and then there's evil.

Sakata Kintoki: Strong folks're strong, and weak ones are weak. Some folks joke around, and some are serious.

Sakata Kintoki: ...There are even some who are beautiful, but scary at the same time.

G:???: Oh, my. There's no need to speak so harshly.

G:???: Why say such a thing when they're so adorably sweet. Don't you agree, heehee? This goddess of Sumer has wonderful taste.

Sakata Kintoki: ...That voice!

Mash: I-I'm sorry, she told me to keep my mouth shut! One more Servant Rayshifted with you!

Mash: But I didn't expect... No, she is approaching along with what looks like several hostile responses!

Mash: Shuten-Douji! You said you wanted to help Senpai!

Shuten-Douji: Heehee. Mash, don't be so harsh with me. I didn't do this maliciously.

Fuuma Kotarou: Three giant demonic statues incoming! And on one of their shoulders...that's...Shuten-Douji...!

Shuten-Douji: I saw these cuties lying around, so I gave them a sip of my wine.

Shuten-Douji: I did nothing wrong. I didn't turn it to poison like when I release my True Name. It's just wine.

Shuten-Douji: All I did was offer it to them.

Shuten-Douji: Heehee, they're so energetic. Look. Their arms, legs, and bodies are all so puffed up.

Shuten-Douji: If they're connected to the gods, see, it's only logical for them to spring to life or grow stronger.

Fuuma Kotarou: It's the Divine Wine... The Shinpen Kidoku! That's the oni's godly poison!

Fuuma Kotarou: B-but according to legend, it's only supposed to strengthen humans! I've never heard of any godly beings getting stronger...!

Sakata Kintoki: Zip it, boy. All we gotta do is smash 'em to pieces.

Sakata Kintoki: I don't care how pretty their faces are or how beautiful their skin is. I got business at the end of that mountain trail!

Sakata Kintoki: They'll be a good warm-up! Yo, Boss! We only just Rayshifted, and already we got a golden battle on our hands!


Fujimaru 1: Ready to battle!


Fujimaru 2: Golden battle... Begin!


Sakata Kintoki: Let's do this!!!

--BATTLE--:

Shuten-Douji: Oh, my. But those were three godly oni—

Shuten-Douji: How disappointing. Heehee. I see you are strong as ever, golden-haired, blue-eyed brat.

Sakata Kintoki: ...Shut up. The hell're you doin' here, anyway?

Mash: Wait, Kintoki! Shuten-Douji really does want to help you and Master out!

Mash: She voluntarily Rayshifted. She said she wanted to head out quickly, even if it could be dangerous.

Mash: Even for a tough Servant like her, a hastened Rayshift makes it very hard to maintain her existence.

Mash: Even then, she—

Sakata Kintoki: That ain't somethin' praiseworthy. That thing there's an oni. No matter how human she acts, she ain't.

Shuten-Douji: Oh, how could you be so cruel? You shouldn't say such a thing just because of how I look.

Sakata Kintoki: Ain't your looks. Not one bit. I'm sayin' it based on what's underneath.

Shuten-Douji: ...Heehee, like he's checking out my underthings...

Shuten-Douji: So, what? Want to keep at it until we die? I'm game, brat.

Fuuma Kotarou: Lord Kintoki. Unnecessary combat...

Sakata Kintoki: I know. She may be an oni, but she's still Boss's Servant. Besides, I'm not the leader of this marching troupe.

Sakata Kintoki: Boss, I'm leaving the decision to you. I'll play along.


Fujimaru 1: Let's take Shuten-Douji with us.

Sakata Kintoki: All right. Can't complain if Boss says so. Let's get goin'.


Fujimaru 2: I have a feeling Shuten-Douji's going to come in handy soon...

Sakata Kintoki: ...You serious, Boss? That thing there's quite a headache.

Sakata Kintoki: Actually, I had the same hunch... I guess... Well, at least I ain't the only one, then.


Shuten-Douji: What, what? Quit your whispering!

Shuten-Douji: Let me in! Me too, me too! Right, Master?

Sakata Kintoki: Too close! Don't you get near me...or Boss!

Shuten-Douji: Heehee. Oh, come on. What a wicked thing to say.

Minamoto-no-Raikou: ... (Gasp!) My mother's intuition is telling me something bad will happen!

Minamoto-no-Raikou: Something that will sadden this mother, something shameful and wanton... Somewhere...

Minamoto-no-Raikou: Could another pest...be bothering Master or Kintoki...?

Boudica: Yes, yes, snap out of it. Pay attention when you're holding a knife.

Boudica: You were the one who wanted to learn how to cook dishes from various countries and eras. You need to concentrate.

Boudica: Got it? Right now, we're the teachers, and you're the student.

Minamoto-no-Raikou: Y-yes. My apologies, teacher. What was I thinking...?

Emiya: Ready? Then let's move on to the next step. Though I have to admit, your knife skills are impressive.

Emiya: It's something of a unique technique, but in the end things are cut properly, so I really shouldn't criticize.

Boudica: No, no. We should be warning her about that, don't you think?

Boudica: Slicing ingredients by throwing them into the air is...you know...probably not ideal.

Boudica: Yeah... That's no good. Let's start over, with the basics.

Emiya: Right. Then let's begin with the proper handling of a knife.

Fuuma Kotarou: ...Yes, I have a bad feeling about this.

Fou: Foufou, fou. Kyuuu.

Fuuma Kotarou: I don't want to think about what's awaiting us when we return to Chaldea... No, no, it's just a wild hunch...

--ARROW--:

Shuten-Douji: Look at this. It's like a harem of my very own.

Shuten-Douji: I have a golden-haired, blue-eyed brat to my right. I have Master on my left. Ready to take me from behind, a red-eyed boy.

Shuten-Douji: I have good wine. All I need is a moon in the sky above, watching over it all...

Shuten-Douji: I can't ask for anything more. Heehee, what do you think? Why not spend a night with me like this?


Fujimaru 1: From behind...?

Shuten-Douji: You know, take me out. The red-eyed boy may look innocent, but in truth he is a savage.

Shuten-Douji: He has a kunai ready to slip between my ribs if I do anything silly.

Shuten-Douji: Or maybe he has a thing for me? Yours may be a bit diluted, but we are still of the same blood. Let's be friendly.

Fuuma Kotarou: N-no. I was simply admiring... (She's not wrong about me watching her, though...)


Fujimaru 2: Nonononono.

Sakata Kintoki: That's my Boss! Hit her where it hurts! Tell her you ain't listening to her hogwash!

Shuten-Douji: Oh, you two meanies are no fun. Well then, how about you? Kotarou, was it?

Shuten-Douji: Why not relax a bit? You are all so busy all the time. It wouldn't kill you to take it easy once in a while.


Fuuma Kotarou: No. Staying here too long would be dangerous. We must do what we came here to do, and return immediately.

Sakata Kintoki: That's a sound argument. Now, floor it. We're almost at the summit.

Fou: Fou, fooou!

Sakata Kintoki: Yeah, you're right. A long stay's a no-go since it's a short-term Rayshift.

Sakata Kintoki: We just came here to get some cleanup done. Nothing more, nothing less. Let's get this over with.

Sakata Kintoki: From what I heard, the history of the Singularity after the Grail gets retrieved is different.

Mash: Yes. The irregularities that occur in a Singularity do not get properly recorded into human history.

Mash: However, based on what King Gilgamesh said, they don't get entirely undone, either...

Sakata Kintoki: Right. It doesn't completely go away. It's not like tears and screams can just be erased.

Sakata Kintoki: Besides. If bad things are left behind, they might have an effect on the periods that come after.

Sakata Kintoki: That's what this cleanup is about. Just a little finishing touch on the Demonic Front. We gotta put a stop to the misdeeds of any family members who might be affiliated with us!

Mash: Affiliated with us? That means...

Shuten-Douji: Oh. How very odd.

Sakata Kintoki: ...Got a problem with that?

Shuten-Douji: No. I'm not sure what, but something in my chest... See, hold out your hand. Right or left side, doesn't matter. See?

Sakata Kintoki: Huh!?

Shuten-Douji: Cop a feel of my chest. Oh, Master. Master. I want Master to do it. See?


Fujimaru 1: I mean, if it's for the mission...

Sakata Kintoki: Boss, she'll eat you up. You better stop.


Fujimaru 2: Hard pass.

Sakata Kintoki: That's the right answer. She'll eat you right up if you just grope at her.


Shuten-Douji: Oh don't say that! I wouldn't just eat Master! Probably. Maybe.

Fuuma Kotarou: Wh-what do you mean maybe!?

Shuten-Douji: What the brat said just triggered me. I didn't know he thought about me that way, and so I...

Shuten-Douji: And so it made me a bit peckish and eating a human or two would be just the thing. My bad.

Shuten-Douji: I was serious, but not serious. Heehee. I'm sure Master won't understand.

Fuuma Kotarou: Please don't just eat us on a whim! Shuten-Douji is exactly what I had heard... Truly wicked, even for an oni!

Sakata Kintoki: That's right. She's an oni. Ain't no two ways about it, she's nothin' like a human.

Sakata Kintoki: Oni live as oni. They kill as oni. They live their lives however they want and don't change for anyone.

Sakata Kintoki: They ain't just mere beasts. They got some things in common with humans, but you better believe they ain't human!

Sakata Kintoki: That's probably why things turned out the way they did here. They don't give a rip what happens to human history.

Shuten-Douji: Teehee. You understand us well.

Shuten-Douji: How strange. The brat should be human, but...

Shuten-Douji: He understands us so well. More than a certain someone who would do just about anything for the promise of chocolate.

Shuten-Douji: You sure know what we're all about.

Sakata Kintoki: You guys weren't exactly subtle, either. Even if it's something you like, you destroy it. Kill. Backstab.

Mash: Enemy signals up ahead! I detect multiple large magical energy responses, Senpai!

Sakata Kintoki: ...They've finally made their appearance. Boss, let's have at 'em!

Ibaraki-Douji: ...?

Ibaraki-Douji: ...Who goes there?

Ibaraki-Douji: This mountain is mine. You don't seem to know what happens to those who trespass.

Ibaraki-Douji: I shall shred your bodies and devour your flesh. I shall gnaw at those bones of yours and toss them away!

Ibaraki-Douji: I am this mountain's master. I am also the leader of the very first group of bandits!


Fujimaru 1: Banana!


Fujimaru 2: Don't tell me you're still here from Gilgamesh's summoning...


Fuuma Kotarou: She's...! Ibaraki-Douji, one of the seven Servants summoned by King Gilgamesh!

Fuuma Kotarou: According to Chaldea's records about the Seventh Singularity, her whereabouts were unknown. But who would have thought...!

Ibaraki-Douji: Oh, it's you. You're that nasty king's friend!

Ibaraki-Douji: No, wait. Aren't you the red-eyed boy? Did you finally decide to work for me?

Ibaraki-Douji: Haha, I knew it! You finally realized that I am a much better master to serve than that stupid king!

Ibaraki-Douji: Tomoe was terrifying, but you're acceptable! As a foreign oni, let's rain terror on this kingdom together!

Fuuma Kotarou: ...Um, I hate to say this, but this is the first time we've met. The “me” that you're talking about is different than “me.”

Ibaraki-Douji: What? Hmmmm, now that you mention it, you smell different. Are you a ghost or something?

Ibaraki-Douji: No matter. I'll say it again: I won't obey anyone!

Ibaraki-Douji: I'm an oni, the master of this mountain! Tell your king that the king of oni rules here!

Sakata Kintoki: Uruk's king is not around anymore. He completed his task and died. He pulled back at the right time.

Sakata Kintoki: As for you... Well, I know you don't care about human history.

Sakata Kintoki: I bet you didn't form any bonds with the King of Heroes, so you don't feel any obligation to anyone.

Sakata Kintoki: Which means you just have to live on as an oni. And while that may work for you...

Sakata Kintoki: Quit roosting on someone else's mountain! You're the oni of Mt. Ooe! Master of the ten raging flames!

Ibaraki-Douji: Wh-what!? Why do you talk like you know me?

Sakata Kintoki: You may not know, but we know, you idiot!

Shuten-Douji: Now, now, she's still being true to who she is, so don't blame her.

Shuten-Douji: Right, Ibaraki? Is being on a different mountain really that fun?

Ibaraki-Douji: That form, that voice... Could it be Shuten? Shuten-Douji!? Wh-why are you here?

Ibaraki-Douji: Is this an illusion? A dream? No, no. Looking closer, the big brawny guy looks familiar...

Ibaraki-Douji: He looks like he has some colored plates over his eyes, but that golden hair and those thick arms that're too big for any human... YOU!

Ibaraki-Douji: SAKATA KINTOKI!?

Sakata Kintoki: Damn straight!!!


Fujimaru 1: Oh right, like Ushiwakamaru, Benkei, and Leonidas...


Fujimaru 2: She doesn't have any memories of Chaldea!


Mash: Yes, so it seems. How the Servants retain their memories in the Singularity...

Mash: ...is something the staff is looking into, but it seems like she has absolutely no memory of Chaldea!

Sakata Kintoki: Ain't no thing! A chance encounter is a sign of divine approval!

Sakata Kintoki: We can't just let a familiar face causin' trouble slide! We gotta do somethin' about it!

Ibaraki-Douji: ...Wh-what!?

Sakata Kintoki: You're just tryin' to live your life. Not your fault, really. I wonder what I would've done in your shoes.

Sakata Kintoki: But it ain't right for you to stay here forever!

Sakata Kintoki: Just think of human history as the surface of a pond. You bein' here's like someone tossin' a pebble in.

Sakata Kintoki: Y'know what happens on impact? Makes a splash, and every droplet in that splash represents a different person.

Sakata Kintoki: Can't really know what'll happen, to be honest. There may be people who will cry, or some might laugh.

Sakata Kintoki: But even so...

Sakata Kintoki: There's a possibility that someone who shouldn't've gotten hurt will get hurt.

Shuten-Douji: ...

Sakata Kintoki: ...No. Not just a possibility. People WILL get hurt. Then they'll scream. That's right. Someone definitely screamed. They wanted my help.

Sakata Kintoki: I heard it. I don't know how or why, but I heard a cry for help.

Sakata Kintoki: So... Sorry, Ibaraki-Douji. I've got no choice but to boot your ass back to the Throne of Heroes.

Ibaraki-Douji: I don't understand! Not at all! Not one bit! What are you even talking about!?

Ibaraki-Douji: You heard a voice? What? I don't hear anything at all!

Ibaraki-Douji: But yeah... One thing's clear. Sakata Kintoki. As long as I make a great show of killing you right here...

Ibaraki-Douji: ...Shuten over there will snap out of it. Good, good, that's good!

Ibaraki-Douji: ...I have to thank you, Kintoki! You brought my friend right to me!

Ibaraki-Douji: I shall slaughter you all, and create a new Mt. Ooe with Shuten!

Fuuma Kotarou: Ibaraki-Douji is approaching!

Mash: Senpai, please be careful! Ibaraki-Douji is not the only one there!

Sakata Kintoki: Hah! Demonic Beasts from the Age of Gods, I see! They're formidable opponents! Let's do this!

Sakata Kintoki: Behold my golden broadaxe shining in the distance! Watch as it suppresses celestial demons and strikes down yasha!

Sakata Kintoki: I'm goin' golden full throttle! This is gonna be Sakata Kintoki's great oni extermination!

--BATTLE--:

Mash: Defeat of the enemy Servant has been confirmed! Senpai, you won!

Ibaraki-Douji: Why... Why? Why must I disappear...?

Ibaraki-Douji: I didn't do anything wrong... I didn't even eat any of the humans who fled here from Uruk or whatever it was...

Ibaraki-Douji: They didn't think they'd survive there... All I did was make them my minions for a while...

Ibaraki-Douji: I was just...living my life... That's all...

Ibaraki-Douji: With the weaklings... With those unknown deformed beasts... Together... That's all...

Ibaraki-Douji: ...Oh, but... Yeah, that's right.

Ibaraki-Douji: For the longest time, it wasn't enough for me... It didn't matter that there were humans around or that those conniving beasts would slink over.

Ibaraki-Douji: There's nobody here. Do you understand? No one who knows me, or who talks to me...

Ibaraki-Douji: It wasn't long before the humans left. Said they were gonna check on Uruk–excuses like that–and just up and left.

Ibaraki-Douji: None of them ever came back. I'm sure they died.

Ibaraki-Douji: The deformed beasts are getting weaker by the day. Had they not been killed, they would've died out soon...

Ibaraki-Douji: ...They were all trembling with fear. They just treated me like a bonfire to huddle around for warmth.

Ibaraki-Douji: But really, I was trembling just like them.

Sakata Kintoki: ...

Ibaraki-Douji: Shuten... Kintoki...

Ibaraki-Douji: I... I...


Fujimaru 1: ...


Shuten-Douji: Hmmm? Say it, Ibaraki.

Ibaraki-Douji: Shuten... Oh, you're right there. Shuten-Douji...

Ibaraki-Douji: Atop this unfamiliar mountain, all by myself... I was...

Ibaraki-Douji: ...I was so lonely...

Mash: Confirmed disappearance of Ibaraki-Douji. Same with the demons.

Fuuma Kotarou: ...Lord Kintoki.

Sakata Kintoki: Yep. That'll do it. Sorry I roped you into my family problems.

Fuuma Kotarou: Oh, no need to apologize! I didn't... Please don't worry about it.

Fuuma Kotarou: You and Master made the right choice, Lord Kintoki. If you hadn't intervened, the incarnated Ibaraki-Douji would likely have affected history.

Shuten-Douji: Right. You had no choice. And if you were killed during this deadly battle, that would be the end of that.

Shuten-Douji: Besides... Heehee...teehee hee...

Shuten-Douji: I've never seen the brat be so... Heehee... Oh, too funny! This is too much, I just don't know what to do with myself!

Sakata Kintoki: ...The hell?

Shuten-Douji: That's the second time you've called us “family.” I wonder what I should tell Ibaraki once we get back to Chaldea.


Fujimaru 1: Oh, yeah...


Fujimaru 2: He did say that.


Sakata Kintoki: !!!

Sakata Kintoki: Well, that... Don't you dare! That's not golden at all!

Shuten-Douji: Oh that is absolutely not my problem. This has been such a treat. Mash, hurry and take us back.

Mash: Uh, okay. All right everyone, the temporary Rayshift ends here. Commencing return Rayshift from the Seventh Singularity!

Ibaraki-Douji: ...What? I have no business with you lot. Scram.

Ibaraki-Douji: I need to meet up with Nitocris. Move it or die. And die, Sakata Kintoki.

Sakata Kintoki: Shut up. Maybe you don't got business with us, but we got business with you!

Ibaraki-Douji: Oh???

Sakata Kintoki: You see... Um...

Ibaraki-Douji: What? Use your words. You're not just teasing me, are you?

Sakata Kintoki: Uh, well you see... Yeah... Just wanted to say sorry. I was trying to tell myself it's okay but it just didn't seem right to me.

Sakata Kintoki: I know it's pointless telling you this, but I won't be satisfied if I don't!

Sakata Kintoki: So... Sorry again. Sorry on a buncha levels.

Ibaraki-Douji: Fool! You're making no sense!

Sakata Kintoki: ...Yeah, guess not. At least take this. Here.

Ibaraki-Douji: A pouch? What's this? Something's inside...

Ibaraki-Douji: (Rustle rustle)

Ibaraki-Douji: ...What!? Could it be...!?

Sakata Kintoki: You like chocolates, right? I put in a buncha different kinds. Ain't exactly an apology gift or nothin', but...

Sakata Kintoki: At least I wrapped it in golden wrapping paper. Well, if you like it, have at it. See ya.

Ibaraki-Douji: Don't you dare come say you want it back! (Munch) (Nom nom)

Sakata Kintoki: Like hell I'd say that!

Minamoto-no-Raikou: Wh-wha-wha-what...!? What is going on? Why is my dear, sweet Kintoki giving that pest a present!?

Minamoto-no-Raikou: This...this is not acceptable! I didn't raise him right! I must act! I have no other choice but to assail— Hmmmf!? (Munch)


Fujimaru 1: Calm down, Mother.


Fujimaru 2: He had his reasons.


Minamoto-no-Raikou: Master, but...! No! They say that one mustn't get too attached!

Shuten-Douji: Heehee. Oh? Are we no more than household pets to you? That may be, but do try not to be so silly.

Shuten-Douji: But still... Whether that brat treats us like someone's child, or a dog or cat...

Shuten-Douji: He does have a few human qualities left to him...