Trial Quest - Miyamoto Musashi
A：???: I can't believe this!
A：???: Whoa, hold on! You were cheating! I didn't even see when you drew your sword!
A：???: Seriously, cut that out! What kind of nonsense is a move I can't see even after I already saw through your movement!? You think people can just swing their swords around like chopsticks or something!?
???: Strength is not from the body alone, but from a state of perfect zen, and absolute purity. That was the ultimate strike, one I spent my entire career as a swordsman perfecting.
???: And yet, you were able to parry it somehow. I didn't pay much attention to this twaddle about “the greatest swordsman under heaven,” since it sounded like you made it up...
???: ...But now, I must cut you down. No matter what, I must cut you down.
A：???: Wait! Waitwaitwait! No way, I don't fight when I can't win!
A：???: Besides, you tricked me! What do you mean the name “Yagyu of Edo” is meaningless!?
A：???: Your skill with a sword is godlike! The people who told me your style was child's play lied!
???: ...Of course. Only the one who rules our nation knows the truth of my skill. Such is not meant for the likes of lowly peasants.
???: If you want to curse anything for being cut down in the middle of the street, curse your own aura as a swordsman.
A：???: ...Well, I can't really complain since I was the one who picked a fight with you... Wait, no, I will complain!
A：???: Shouldn't a powerful swordsman and government official like you just ignore taunts from a wanderer like me!?
A：???: But no! Not only did you ambush me, but you weren't even taking the fight seriously!?
A：???: That's not fair! You bully! Bullying the weak is bad!
A：???: (...Looking at him, it seems nothing I say will matter anymore. This old geezer is unlike any opponent I've faced before.)
A：???: (I can't see his attacks. I can't win. I guess this is the end of the road for me... Hm?)
A：???: YES! It's that thing again! Thank you, O merciful bodhisattva!
A：???: Since it looks like luck is on my side, I better take advantage of it and run! Sorry, but our fight ends here, Yagyu...something!
A：???: I won't taunt you again, so just forget about me! Bye!
A：???: Phew, that worked! I'm getting so dizzy right noooooow!
???: ...She's gone. To think she would be versed in the demon arts as well as swordsmanship.
???: I may have injured her, but her head is still on her shoulders... To survive my secret technique not once, but twice...
???: Shinmen Musashi-no-Kami Fujiwara-no-Harunobu. I will never forget your name.
Fujimaru 1: ...Wait...
Fujimaru 2: ...This is...
Fujimaru 1: ...I've seen this place before?
Fujimaru 2: ...This looks familiar...
A：???: ...Ugh... Hmmm... Argh, my head hurts...
Fujimaru 1: Someone has collapsed!
Fujimaru 2: Hey, are you okay!?
A：???: ...! This is nothing, I can still fight!
A：???: Wait... Huh? Who...are you? Where's that scary old geezer?
Fujimaru 1: ...You... You were about to kill me...
A：???: Sorry about that! Y'know, if you tell me what's going on, I'll be even MORE apologetic. I'll even buy you a bowl of udon after!
A：???: But, before that...
Fujimaru 2: ...No, who are YOU?
A：???: I asked the question first. You're dressed funny... Hmm, looks like you're from another country?
A：???: In any case...
A：???: You, unfamiliar foreigner! Before you name yourself, you must answer this!
A：???: Who in the world am I!? And where exactly is this!?
Fujimaru 1: ...You lost your memories?
A：???: Yes, it seems that way. I must have hit my head hard, and forgot who I am.
A：???: So, I'd appreciate it if you could tell me my name. Oh, but if you don't know, that's fine too.
A：???: If you could just point me to a nearby tea shop, I'll handle the rest myself.
A：???: So? Do you know my name? Do you know anything about this place?
Fujimaru 1: ...I'm sorry...
Fujimaru 2: I'm afraid I don't know either...
A：???: I see... Yup, then nothing I can do. This stuff happens.
A：???: Sorry for asking so much. Anyway, let's get back to the introduction.
A：???: What's your name? My memories don't matter, but I can't call someone I just met “Hey You,” right?
Fujimaru 1: Fujimaru.
A：???: Okay, Fujimaru. I'm sorry about slashing at you just now.
A：???: You revived me, right? After I passed out? Well, it looks like no one stole anything off me...
A：???: It seems luck is on my side again this time. For someone as cute as you...
A：???: ...No, for someone as pure-hearted as you to wake me up.
Oni B: Heh...hehe! This new year is starting off great for us!
Oni B: Hey, partner! We've got some humans washed up over here! TWO OF THEM!
Oni B: Look at that one, tasty-looking meat and nice clothes! She even got swords around her waist!
Oni B: That [♂ guy /♀ girl] over there, though... No flair at all. No swords, no fancy getup...
Oni B: But perfect for physical labor! Let's grab [♂ him /♀ her] so [♂ he /♀ she] can make our meals!
Oni A: ...Not bad. It's about time we started aiming higher.
Oni A: A full-fledged oni has human slaves. It will keep those weirdos staying at the gate in check.
Oni A: Hey, you two humans there. If you don't want to die, come quietly and do as we say.
Oni A: If you resist, we won't have any choice: we'll have to hurt one of you. Real bad.
Fujimaru 1: ...Go on! Run!
A：???: Of course. If running would take care of it, I'd be happy to. But, it doesn't seem like running will do the trick.
Fujimaru 2: Can you fight?
A：???: Hmm... My memory's hazy... Can't even remember my own name... Still, I'm guessing this isn't something we can just run away from, so...
A：???: I mean, those are real oni, right? Here we go again... I always end up in weird places like this.
A：???: Fine, I shall fight! Fujimaru, I'll trust you to cover me!
A：???: I don't know where you idiots came from, but you sure have guts, talking weird trash like that to a couple of strangers who washed up on a beach!
A：???: I can tolerate thieves, miscreants, oni, centipede monsters...even Osakabe-hime! But I just can't stand evil jerks like you!
A：???: Now, an honest match, you oni-looking villains! Playtime is over. I'll send you back to hell!
Eeeeeek! What's with this human!? She's super strong!
Oni A: That dual sword stance... Ferocious, yet perfectly controlled... The flexibility and ability to adapt to any and all situations...
Oni A: This woman... Don't tell me... She's the famous Miyamoto Musashi! The one who killed off all the disciples of the Yoshioka school!
Whaaat!? You know of her, partner!?
Oni A: Indeed. I once devoted myself to the way of the sword. I'm familiar with all the famous swordsmen.
Oni A: This woman is Miyamoto Musashi, without a doubt! No, but... Woman... A woman...?
Fujimaru 1: Miyamoto Musashi...!
Musashi: ...Mmm, I guess that's my name. Sounds right to me.
Musashi: Do you know about me, Fujimaru? Is the name Miyamoto Musashi famous or something?
Fujimaru 2: Apparently your name is Musashi.
Musashi: Yeah. Sounds about right to me, so let's go with that.
Musashi: Although... I can't remember what kind of person this “Musashi” is... Well, she's probably a good-for-nothing person!
Musashi: In any case, we're still in the middle of a match. Hey, oni, thanks for telling me my name.
Eeek! If that's Musashi, there's no way we'd win! Sorry, Sukeroku, die for me!
Whoa, don't push me to the front! What are you, an evil oni!? Oh... Wait... Yeah...
Oni A: Ugh arrrgh! I'm going to die here!
Oni A: ...Hm? I'm not dead? I'm still alive?
Oni A: You mean Musashi let me live? The same Musashi they say kills everyone she meets?
Musashi: Where did you hear that?
Musashi: My memory is still hazy right now, but I won't cut down an opponent who's lost the will to fight.
Musashi: We're not at war or anything. Isn't it a bit barbaric to kill someone on first sight?
Musashi: If I can scare away my opponent through intimidation, that's a perfect victory.
Musashi: All I want's money and fame. Killing my opponents will only make people hate me!
Oni A: I-is that so...? You say that, but each of your attacks was powerful enough to kill...
Musashi: Well, yeah. Obviously. I didn't practice my bladework just so I could go easy on opponents.
Musashi: That said, I don't need a trail of blood and corpses following me. Only a true swordsman can stop a slash mid-strike.
Musashi: I don't fight if there's nothing in it for me. Lemme see...
Musashi: Weeell, if you have a bounty on your head, I'mma cut it off and get that bounty! But you don't... Do you?
Musashi: You don't look like you got a lotta money, or like someone'd be paying for your head.
Musashi: Okay, then! Hate the sin, not the...um...oni. You know what? Just consider yourself lucky, and forget about me!
Oni A: ...
Musashi: Right! Since I think I know my name now, let me reintroduce myself. I am Miyamoto Musashi! Probably.
Musashi: Nice to meetcha, Fujimaru! For now, let's head to the tea shop I see on top of that ridge!
Interlude : First Gate
Musashi: I see. Chaldea, Servants, and Rayshifts, oh my...
Musashi: I've never heard of any of those, but I have an idea of who you are now.
Musashi: And you're saying I'm one of those so-called Servants?
Fujimaru 1: With that dual-wielding stance? Definitely.
Fujimaru 2: Musashi was a famous hero and swordsman.
Musashi: ...Hmm... That doesn't sound right... I definitely don't remember getting treated like a hero, or a famed swordsman...
Musashi: And it's not just 'cause I don't remember much about myself, y'know?
Musashi: That kinda...makes my nose itchy. I can just feel that something about that's a bit off.
Musashi: I don't think I'm the same swordsman you know of, Fujimaru. That's for sure, but...
Musashi: Eh, the little stuff can wait! Let's fill up our tummies first!
Musashi: Miss, bring more dumplings! Also, bring me some udon! Plain or not doesn't matter, just gimme what you got!
Fujimaru 1: Losing your memory doesn't bother you?
Musashi: Tee hee hee. Just knowing my name's making this better.
Musashi: Besides, there's no use worrying about what you don't know, right?
Fujimaru 2: Do you have any money?
Musashi: ...! Don't tell me... Fujimaru, you don't have any money?
Musashi: Hmm... Okay, let's just sell the shop owner something of ours! This sword guard is quite well-crafted, no?
Musashi: Don't worry, if I sell it, it'll cover travel expenses for a while. I'll share some with you too, Fujimaru.
Musashi: I mean, selling it'll kinda ruin its legacy and stuff... Eh! Luckily, I still have other swords.
Musashi: Anywho, you woke up on this island, and you remember having being here before... Am I correct?
Musashi: How did you get back to your original world before? I wonder if that strange hole is somewhere on this island, too?
Fujimaru 1: Original world...?
Fujimaru 2: Don't tell me... You, too?
Musashi: Yep! Already got used to it. Happens to me a lot. I just kinda meander into weird worlds.
Musashi: Last time, I ended up in the western part of this place called “America.” I had to fight a bunch of guys with pistols.
Musashi: The priestess that took care of me then said that I was a stranger.
Musashi: Apparently, I'm the sort who gets spirited away all the time. That's why I end up in all sorts of places.
Musashi: Usually, there's a hole to return to the original world nearby. So, long as I can find it, I can get back to the previous world.
Fujimaru 1: A swordsman who Rayshifts without realizing it...
Fujimaru 2: Isn't that a big deal...?
Musashi: Naaah! That's just how things have always been for me! It's not like I'm dying or anything!
B：???: I see. Openhearted and cheerful like in all the stories.
B：???: Even in a predicament that would kill an ordinary person, she just shrugs it off... I'm at a loss for words.
Fujimaru 1: The oni from earlier!
B：???: No, hold on, Master from Chaldea.
Sukeroku: I am Sukeroku. Raiden-no-Sukeroku. Caretaker of the fields and farms on this island.
Sukeroku: An oni making a meager living in Onigashima, a land that lost its master and is now fated to disappear.
Sukeroku: I couldn't help but be concerned about that woman saying she was Musashi. That's why I followed you...
Musashi: Oh, right. Don't just stand there. Care to sit next to me?
Sukeroku: No, I can't sit next to Miyamoto Musashi, even if you're only claiming to be him. I'm afraid my head would come toppling off my shoulders at any moment.
Sukeroku: I think I'd prefer to stand. ...Also, I came here bearing good news.
Sukeroku: Onigashima is an island someone created, then abandoned. This place doesn't exist in the real world anymore.
Sukeroku: This is the boundary of dreams and illusions.
Sukeroku: These days, the only visitors we get are oni with nowhere else to go... Just like us...
Sukeroku: But today must be quite the special day. Many travelers have wandered into this dream.
Sukeroku: Three great oni occupying the gates. A Master of Chaldea washing up ashore.
Sukeroku: And, a lady swordsman calling herself Miyamoto Musashi tumbles into a place she's wholly unconnected to.
Sukeroku: Each of you with unknown origins, but doubtless foreigners. If so, you want to return to your native worlds, yes?
Musashi: Yes. The dumplings here suck!
Fujimaru 1: I really do need to get back to Chaldea...
Sukeroku: Well, then matters are simple. Head for the summit of Onigashima.
Sukeroku: “Her” shrine still sits on the summit of Onigashima. A sanctuary shrouded in her divine aura.
Sukeroku: This world's god will reject anything that's deemed unnecessary.
Sukeroku: Given that, foreigners like you should get “bounced back” to your original world the moment you reach the summit.
Musashi: That's splendid. Thanks for the advice, Lord Raiden-no-Sukeroku.
Sukeroku: S-sure, you did spare my life, so I owed you one. No need to than–
Musashi: Okay! I, Fujimaru, and Lord Sukeroku, shall proceed to the summit of Onigashima!
Musashi: We just need to go past that gate in the distance, right? You can guide us, hold our luggage, and make our meals!
Musashi: Oh, and I'm not really asking. I'm telling.
Musashi: Defy me, and I'll give you some PAIN! So, better just do what I say!
Fujimaru 1: (Politeness x oppression = Musashi's power...!)
Fujimaru 2: (And now we have yet another weirdo Saber...)
Sukeroku: In the first place, Miyamoto Musashi is known as the most powerful swordsman in the history of Japan. He is said to have lived in the early Edo period.
Sukeroku: The “Niten Ichiryu” he created is a style that utilized both long and short swords, and is considered the quintessential “dual-wielding style” in Japan.
Sukeroku: The many duels Musashi fought with other swordmasters while he was in his twenties are known across the land, and serve as inspiration for a great deal of literature and entertainment.
Sukeroku: Among us oni, Musashi is synonymous with the dual-wielding style, and is both feared and loved at the same time.
Sukeroku: So much so that many oni children would swing around two clubs pretending to be Musashi.
Musashi: The Niten Ichiryu... The Book of Five Rings... The Throne of Void... Ah... I am starting to remember things...
Musashi: I haven't reached the fifth blade yet.
Musashi: When I was out in the Sagami area in hopes of training, I met a strange old man in a gazebo while sheltering from the rain...
Sukeroku: ...I see. They say Musashi was born in Ohara, Sakushu.
Sukeroku: His father's name was Shinmen Munisai, the martial arts coach of the Shinmen clan in Takeyama Castle. His lord was the one who gave him the name “Shinmen.”
Sukeroku: Munisai set up a dojo for jitte skills in Miyamoto, Yoshino. Musashi considered this home, so later used Miyamoto as a surname...
Sukeroku: Stories of Miyamoto Musashi are popular, but Shinmen Munisai was incredibly skilled as well.
Sukeroku: Consider that the name he gave himself is “Muni,” which means “unique.” You have to be quite skilled to consider calling yourself that!
Sukeroku: To be unique is to be the singular, ultimate one. In other words, it's a show of a powerful ego asserting none follow in his footsteps.
Sukeroku: Musashi, his son, calling his own style “Niten” is surely respect for his great father—
Sukeroku: Hmm? I'm getting a chill somehow. Do oni catch colds as well?
Fujimaru 1: Musashi is totally glaring at you!
Fujimaru 2: I don't know why, but don't talk about her dad!
Sukeroku: Oh! Right! There's not much point in trying to recount Musashi's history with her standing right here, is there? It's certainly nothing she doesn't know!
Sukeroku: Sorry about that. A slip of the tongue. It's just, none of the oni are interested in stories of this sort, so...
Sukeroku: I... I can't help but be attracted to swords. Because of that, I've spent a lot of time rifling through books and documents alone.
Musashi: Well, I've never heard of any oni versed in swordsmanship. On the other hand, I have heard of people becoming oni-like in pursuit of swordsmanship.
Musashi: Oh well, I already knew that was the version of the story in your world.
Fujimaru 1: Wait, what do you mean?
Musashi: In my world, Shinmen Munisai was as violent as a storm,
Musashi: and his child was abandoned simply because she was a girl.
Musashi: But wait! She wasn't discouraged by the abandonment! Nope! She built a shed to live right under that bastard father's nose!
Musashi: I don't know what kind of swordsman Miyamoto Musashi was in the worlds of Lord Sukeroku or Fujimaru.
Musashi: But in MY world, “Miyamoto Musashi” is still a nameless swordsman that lives each day in self-indulgence.
Musashi: ...Well, someone once told me I was from a world that went toootally off the rails–a Pruning Theoretical Phenomenon. That's why I'm different than the other Musashi, they said.
Musashi: But the Musashi in your world became famous? That's pretty awesome.
Musashi: When you get down to it, Miyamoto Musashi is just a careless sorta fellow. But in his version, he was at least able to touch the Throne of Void.
Fujimaru 1: Pruning Theoretical Phenomenon?
Fujimaru 2: Throne of Void...?
Sukeroku: Pruning Theoretical Phenomenon...? I've never heard the term before. What does it mean?
Musashi: Who knows? Perhaps it's a destiny like the morning dew. I don't know all that much myself.
Sukeroku: This is the first great gate. This was the gate Kazakoemaru guarded in the past...
C：???: Hoooooohohoho! How dare you show up, seedy bald oni and country girl who doesn't even have a long-sleeved kimono!
C：???: It's the New Year! The first dawn of the year! The neighborhood overflows with New Year gifts and the pharaoh's sun!
C：???: No day is as joyous as today! In other words... Yes, in other words, it's MY turn!
Fujimaru 1: ...
Cleopatra: Eh... What is this... This quiet as if this was a mall where every store was shuttered and closed...
Cleopatra: ...That was a mistake. Making an elegant and conservative entrance just because it is the New Year... What was I thinking!?
Cleopatra: Right! A pharaoh must be brazen like the glimmering sun for any and every occasion!
Cleopatra: Just like the great Ozymandias! And Nitocris!
Nitocris: You know I'm not like that.
Cleopatra: Yes! I appreciate your support from the bottom of my heart, Pharaoh Nitocris!
Nitocris: That's... That's really not...what I meant...
Cleopatra: All right! Now that I have my support, let's try this again!
Cleopatra: Hooohohoho! Surprised you made it here, scrawny ugly oni and girl with three Buster Cards!
Cleopatra: But your advance ends here! I will not allow any further violence!
Cleopatra: That's because... Yes, that's because... I'm going to turn this island into my second castle!
Fujimaru 1: Second castle...!?
Fujimaru 2: She...she wouldn't repeat the nightmare of Castle Csejte!
Cleopatra: Right! I couldn't borrow a pyramid from Pharaoh Ozymandias this time...
Cleopatra: ...But I have superior money management skills! Give me three days, and this gate will be renovated into a classy spa!
Cleopatra: Once I'm done, you will all be able to rest to your heart's content! The first three days of the year are special, so take it easy!
Musashi: Really? We have no money but you'll let us stay in an inn?
Cleopatra: Heh, of course, samurai girl. That obi you have is quite exquisite! I am always looking for new girlfriends!
Musashi: So she says. No idea what she's talking about, but she seems awfully generous, I guess?
Musashi: It's the New Year, right? How about we forget about going to the summit and just rest here?
Fujimaru 1: You realize she's going to put you to work, right?
Cleopatra: Heh... To think you would call me out on that. I expect nothing less from the Master who saved humanity.
Cleopatra: Six hours per shift, two shifts a day, each separated by a six-hour break.
Cleopatra: With this miraculous labor law, I can turn a single working day into two. That's how you lot will build my new castle!
Fujimaru 2: Our New Year's vacation will end!
Cleopatra: N-no, you can take longer than those special three days. I mean, some schools are taking the entire week off, no?
Sukeroku: Who knows? I heard people are starting to work a lot sooner now.
Musashi: ...I knew it! She runs a shady business!
Musashi: The only real miracle in the world should be udon! Let's defeat her and move on!
Cleopatra: She holds her head so high...! Not only do you not go with my plan, but you accuse me of running a shady business! Now I MUST fight!
Cleopatra: I am the final heir of the Pharaoh Fighting Style... The very incarnation of beauty, Cleopatra VII Philopator!
Cleopatra: I don't know what Heroic Spirit you are, but I'm not just a supreme beauty!
Sukeroku: What... Pharaoh Fighting Style...!?
Fujimaru 1: You know of it, Raiden!?
Sukeroku: Yes... In a land far to the west, someone devised a magical attack strengthened by pompous acts and laughs!
Sukeroku: The more pompous and cocky you act, the greater king you become... To think those are the requirements to inherit such a fighting style...
Sukeroku: Obviously, I don't need to tell you that once you inherit the style, you always look at people with your head held—
Musashi: Okay, stand back, Lord Sukeroku! That girl's weapon is a sickle chain as big as Baiken's!
Sukeroku: Amazing! The match is over!
Fujimaru 1: Winner, Shinmen Musashi-no-Kami!
Musashi: Ah, hearing that declaration of the victor felt so good! Thanks, Fujimaru!
Cleopatra: Tch... You people don't know a good opportunity when you see one!
Cleopatra: This is where you should be praising me! This is your chance to receive the greatest New Year gift ever: my unparalleled beauty!
Cleopatra: But I will not give up! My dream of a fitness boot camp island—
Cleopatra: For the sake of my dear Caesar, I will make Cleopatra Fitness Island a reality!
Musashi: Huh? She disappeared. I didn't even hit her that hard, though...
Fujimaru 1: She went back to Chaldea.
Musashi: I see. Glad I didn't end up killing her. Okay, moving on!
Musashi: From the look of things, these, um... Servants, you call them? I bet they'll be at the other gates, too.
Musashi: It'll be good if we can talk things out with them, but if we have to fight, that's fine too!
Musashi: Wielding my sword will probably restore my memories, and I'm happy for any chance to fight a strong opponent!
Interlude : Second Gate
Tamamo Cat Woof: Hahaha! Master here on New Year's, welcome! I am the dream cat guarding the second gate.
Tamamo Cat Woof: My name is Tamamo Cat Woof! There will be no lounging around a kotatsu eating mandarin oranges here!
Musashi: Now it's a fox-girl? Fujimaru, your friends are weird.
Tamamo Cat Woof: Of course! Master has an A Rank in Endurance, and will listen to even the ramblings of a wild cat with patience!
Tamamo Cat Woof: However. However...! This cat is ticked!
Tamamo Cat Woof: I've been carefully getting ready for a nice traditional New Year's meal since the end of last year...
Tamamo Cat Woof: I was willing to skip the last battle for it. Honestly, being an all-star is so annoying.
Tamamo Cat Woof: So I was peeling my shrimp, resolved to duck out of any battles...
Tamamo Cat Woof: When Master... Master... Master ordered the New Years meal at a convenience store!
Tamamo Cat Woof: And [♂ he /♀ she] even ordered one for me! So considerate! But that turned out to just really make me angry!
Sukeroku: Ah... That's no good. Don't you know why New Year's meals are so elaborate, kid?
Sukeroku: They're made of food that lasts so that the lady of the house doesn't have to cook for three days straight.
Sukeroku: And they're made elaborately and lovingly with as many of the husband's favorite foods as possible. It's their way of showing their gratitude at the end of the year.
Fujimaru 1: Huh?
Musashi: Yes... They say New Year's Day dictates the rest of the year, you know. So traditionally for the wife, pleasing her significant other with a homemade New Year's meal...
Musashi: ...is a way to infuse the relationship with love, spirit, joy, and mutual support for the whole year ahead!
Musashi: And you just went out and got a store-bought one...? Even my jerk dad gets quiet in front of a New Year's meal...
Fujimaru 1: Huh!?
Tamamo Cat Woof: That's right! This kitty's chest is about to burst with sadness!
Tamamo Cat Woof: Actually, it did burst. And the result was—
Tamamo Cat Woof Woof: Happy New Year, Master! I am Tamamo Cat Woof Woof, the hawk!
Tamamo Cat Woof Woof Woof: Never get store-bought meals! I'm Tamamo Cat Woof Woof Woof, and I'm taking it to the danger zone!
Tamamo Cat Woof: As you can see, the sadness split my heart into three pieces! And the result was the raging feline, Tamamo Cat.
Tamamo Cat Woof Woof: Hehehe. One's good enough, and now there's two more of us. You're gonna need a whole lot of carrots!
Tamamo Cat Woof Woof: Now we have no choice but to open up a maid café, or rather a maid CATfé! But where do we get the cats?
Tamamo Cat Woof Woof Woof: Impressive, a maid enterprising enough to open up a café! How modern! Does that make Master the café owner?
Tamamo Cat Woof: That's right, kitties! So let's grab our Master!
Tamamo Cat Woof: Open Caaaaaats! Eagle, Jaguar, Bear... LET'S COMBINE!
Tamamo Cat Woof: Let's go, Master! It's time for some triple cat trouble!
Interlude : Third Gate
Sukeroku: Huh? The last gate's supposed to be here...
Sukeroku: But instead there's this weird field. And what's that funky steel tower...
Fujimaru 1: That rocket...!
Fujimaru 2: Watch out! You'll be ambushed!
Musashi: ...! A ghastly aura!
X: Heh. Not bad, new Saber! You guys just keep popping up like weeds, don't you?
X: I've been watching from afar... What's with that cool battle animation!?
X: A true Saber should only use a single beloved blade! Using two is so wrong... You should be ashamed of yourself!
Fujimaru 1: Yeah. Dual-wielding isn't a Saber style at all.
X: That is correct. I knew you were the type of Master who would understand, Fujimaru. Hello!
X: Here's your New Year's present. It's red bean paste balls they sell at a station on planet Guntama.
X: Anyway, did you hear that, newbie!? Dual-wielding is MY thing, so cut it out!
X: Even my self-control, which is reinforced as tightly as a plasma chain, is still about to snap!
Fujimaru 2: Musashi, that's a ninja.
Musashi: Huh? No way! Ninjas don't stand out like that.
Musashi: And her skill with the sword seems like the real deal. It's a style I've never seen before. I can tell that she's a master swordsman.
Musashi: Yeah. That girl looks really fun. How do I put it... I've never met anybody so deserving of my blade!
X: Umm... When you say that with a smile on your face, it's like you're telling me you like me. You're making me blush!
X: ...This is bad... I get the same sense from this Saber as I did from that kimono-clad street murderer!
X: Either way, I'm going to attack like I'm the victor of this fight! I am Heroine X, the Space Saber!
X: I work to maintain the balance of the Servant universe by defeating the ever growing number of Sabers! All things must be perfectly in balance!
X: Taste my ever-so-flashy Saber Ninja Technique!
Sukeroku: What...? Saber Ninja Technique, you say!?
Fujimaru 1: I knew you would know about this, Raiden.
Sukeroku: Yes, it's a demonic technique some traveler taught to the King of Knights–after the latter crossed the sea by mistake and got lost on Mt. Katsuragi.
Sukeroku: Though extraordinarily powerful, it's a cursed technique that becomes almost useless once its user joins your side.
Sukeroku: I never thought such a technique would ever get implemented... I mean, would actually exist!
X: Heh. I may not have Nameless Red or Babbagen with me this time, but I do have barbaric techniques that can only be used alone!
X: Get ready, dual-wielder! And be careful, Fujimaru!
X: Don't underestimate me just because it's New Year's! I'm kind of seriously strong right now!
Fujimaru 1: Fine! Bring it on!
Fujimaru 2: Please go easy since it's New Year's.
X: ...! This Saber's a pain!
X: Just like me, she'll do whatever it takes to win, and it really looks like ANYTHING goes!
Musashi: No way! Sure, I'll do whatever I need to in order to win, but my policy is to master a single technique!
Musashi: Niten Ichiryu is an attempt to challenge and overcome an absolute “one”!
Musashi: I've set my eyes on your weakness! I shall reach the apex of heaven. Now prepare yourself!
X: ...! She's after my left hand...! I know what she's doing, but I don't think I can stop her...!
X: Oww! Owwwww! I can't believe she destroyed the W. F. D. bracelet on my wrist!
X: This was specially made by the new engineer that joined my Knights of the Round Table team, Lionhead!
X: Very well! We'll finish this later! Actually, I'm running away because I'm scared!
X: But don't think you've won! A second and third me will appear one of these days! Just wait for it!
X: Until we meet again, Fujimaru! I'll see you in yet another spacey war someday!
Musashi: ...She also disappeared. Well, that was a strange opponent.
Musashi: Fujimaru, are all Servants like that?
Fujimaru 1: X is...special.
Fujimaru 2: Just forget about her.
Musashi: I see. So she's an exception among exceptions. That explains why we got along so well.
Sukeroku: ...Hm. What exactly does that mean?
Musashi: Neither she nor I are really part of this world. In a sense, we're alike that way.
Musashi: You know, I'm the kind of girl who randomly wanders into different worlds. I know how it feels to be left out no matter where you are.
Sukeroku: ...I knew it.
Sukeroku: Anyway, this is the final gate. We're almost to the top. Let's hurry before someone else stops us.
Musashi: Whoa... So that's what the Incineration of Humanity was...? You battled and went through a lot!
Musashi: That means you took back our history and future, right? That's amazing. I'm sure everyone praised you for that.
Musashi: So let me add in as a bonus: Good work, Fujimaru. I'm sure it was a long year for you.
Musashi: Oh, and another thing, Master of Chaldea... Happy New Year!
Musashi: Thanks to you, I can continue my journey!
Fujimaru 1: I was helped by so many around me.
Musashi: Aww, come on! Bonding with others is great and all, but that alone's not enough to do it justice!
Musashi: In the end, it was all about your potential!
Sukeroku: ...I'm very interested in you as well, Shinmen Musashi. Why have you continued your wandering journeys?
Fujimaru 2: What's your goal for your journey?
Musashi: My journey's goal? Um, that's...
Sukeroku: Yes. I would like to know as well. Shinmen Musashi, what do you seek?
Musashi: ...Hmm. My journey is just to perfect my skills, so there's no real goal.
Musashi: I guess if I had a goal, it's to get home to my world. And to master my bladework.
Musashi: My dad... Munisai's blade was about “one.” A perfected “one.” A “one” that reached heights that could never be exceeded.
Musashi: But I HAAATE that damn old man. So I want to surpass him no matter what it takes.
Musashi: So I want a sword that can exceed “one.” Before I die, I want to reach the Throne of the Void. I want to achieve “zero.”
Musashi: There it is! I feel it! Fujimaru, there's a hole there!
Fujimaru 1: I can't see it, but I can tell.
Fujimaru 2: We got here pretty anticlimactically.
Musashi: ...Well, you're right. It's too bad, since we got to know each other so well.
Musashi: I have my own world, and you have your own world of Chaldea.
Musashi: It's a shame, but we have to say goodbye. But if we have the chance, I'm sure we'll meet again somewhere—
Sukeroku: No, that will never happen. You will die here, Shinmen Musashi.
Sukeroku: You said you wanted to go home, right? But that was never going to happen in the first place.
Fujimaru 1: ...!?
Fujimaru 2: He's turning into... a Servant!?
Musashi: ...What? Did you know me, Sukeroku?
Musashi: Did you follow me around because you hated me for some reason?
???: ...That's right. For a long, long time, I had forgotten. I had forgotten how I became an oni.
???: On that day, I fought with you.
???: After I killed those monkey-like brats in the Miyamoto village, I just happened to pass you by on the mountain road.
???: What a beautiful sight you were, there in the twilight. The very embodiment of evil.
???: I knew instantly that I had to fight you or I would have regretted it.
???: That's how beautiful your demeanor was. It was enough to drive me mad, had I let you go.
???: ...And you defeated me. And now I'm finally able to remember your words you uttered at that time.
???: “If it's for money or honor, I'm going to run. If it's for hate or duty, I'll run then, too.”
???: “But...if you say your spirit can't survive unless you kill me, then I shall fight you.”
???: “If our lives cannot exist without killing each other, then I shall resign myself to this bloodshed.”
Musashi: Yeah, that sounds right. I'll kill someone for that reason.
???: Indeed. So then you defeated me, and I wandered the world harboring a grudge. The next thing I knew, I had become an oni that had forgotten everything.
???: But...meeting you brought back my rage. I will repeat what I said then.
???: “Fight me, flower that blossoms at the apex of heaven. Life is meaningless to me if I don't kill you.”
Musashi: ... (Sigh)
Musashi: Sorry, Fujimaru, can you help me out?
Musashi: I don't think I can slay him completely. But with you, I can let him move on to the next life. I know it's a pain, but—
Fujimaru 1: All right. It won't be for your sake...
Musashi: ...Yup. I knew I could count on the one who saved the world. It's impressive at your age.
Musashi: Very well, you obsessed oni. I don't know who you are.
Musashi: No, I don't even remember your name. You must be one of the many warriors I slew.
Musashi: I doubt I will remember this fight, either. But come.
Musashi: I am Shinmen Musashi-no-Kami Fujiwara-no-Harunobu! Master of the Niten Ichiryu! With my Fifth Force, I shall cut your obsession crosswise!
Musashi: Arima whatchamacallit, your life is mine...!
Oni: Gwaah... Oooohh...!
Oni: This inescapable declaration of death— This is it! This is the flower of the blade I saw on that day...!
Oni: Haha— But, how futile.
Oni: Poor Musashi. How sad, Musashi. The desire to return home—
Oni: You cannot return anywhere. You are the same as the Heroic Spirits.
Oni: I'm sure you've realized it already. Your world disappeared a long time ago.
Oni: You were ejected from your vanishing world, and you are going up a creek without a paddle through the worlds of others.
Oni: You'll be an outcast, forever and ever.
Oni: There is no world left for you to belong to.
Oni: You will never be able to return home, and your journey will continue forever. That is, until the time you meet the greatest foe of your life.
Oni: Thus, I pity you. For such a master of the arts does not exist.
Musashi: ...Hold it. I hate to criticize someone's dying words, but what are you talking about?
Musashi: I can encounter all kinds of “greatest foes.” I mean, I was almost killed by a scary old guy just recently.
Oni: ...No. That's not it. That's not it, Musashi.
Oni: There are no doubt better swordsmen, greater masters than you.
Oni: But that is not what I mean by your greatest foe.
Oni: It's the path that you seek. To a swordsman, the greatest foe is one who has mastered the path, the Origin opposite to their own.
Oni: But...but, that will never be fulfilled. Such a person doesn't even exist.
Oni: The Swordsman of the Heavenly Eye. That path where zero rivals one is, in other words, infinity.
Oni: No swordsman has ever reached infinity. Such a path is something no one can ever reach.
Oni: Thus...your journey will never end. You are just like a drifting boat—
Oni: Oh... How I pity you, Musashi. How sad you are, Musashi.
Oni: All your talent will never pay off. Even with all your training, you will never get a chance to truly use it...
Oni: Like a flower blooming in the twilight, you will only scatter idly.
Musashi: Begone to your next life. Someday, I will join you.
Fujimaru 1: ...
Fujimaru 2: ...Musashi.
Musashi: All right. Now that the pain in the neck is gone, it really is time to say goodbye.
Musashi: That oni said I can't go back to my old world, but don't let it bother you too much.
Musashi: If nothing else, I can go back to the world I was in before I came here. Just like how you'll wake up in Chaldea.
Musashi: Oh, if you do make it safely back, immortalize me in a journal or something.
Musashi: Well, we were companions for a while. A really, really short while, though...
Fujimaru 1: I want you to remember, too.
Musashi: ...Yes, of course! Anyway, goodbye, Master!
Musashi: ...Oh, right! I'm so dumb. How could I just realize this now?
Musashi: A once-a-year joyous and happy event— of course it was fun!
Musashi: This was the first dream you had in the new year!
Fujimaru 1: Yeah. See you later, Musashi!
Fou: Fou, foou?
Mash: Good morning, Senpai. Happy New Year.
Mash: As I promised last night, I am here for your seven o'clock wake-up call!
Mash: You're going to help Da Vinci with her mochi-making party, right?
Mash: I can't wait to—Master?
Mash: ...Um, is something wrong? It looks like you were crying...
Fujimaru 1: ...I don't know.
Fujimaru 2: ...I think I had a strange dream...
Fou: Fou, fooou?
Mash: I see. But it wasn't a bad one, was it?
Mash: How do I know, you ask? I can tell. You look very happy.
Mash: It was sad, but there was also something good... That's the look you always have when that happens.
Fou: Fou. Fou!
Fujimaru 1: ...I see. Happy New Year, Mash.
Fujimaru 2: Let's go see Da Vinci!
Right! I'll accompany you on our first mission of 2019, Master!
Fou: Fou, fouuu!